2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
In practice, I come across what they say about my mother, and not about the parents: “I will go to my mother, I was with my mother,” and so on. I specify who lives in the house with mom, the answer is: "well, mom and dad." Where are the stories about dad? Where is the seat for dad? Why am I going to my mom and not my parents? I'll Skype my mom, not my parents. We begin to talk about the role of the father, but it is belittled, devalued and not given its due place.
- What about dad?
- Tell about him. What is your daddy?
- He's good, but not what he should be.
A curtain
And where does the child have such an opinion? At birth, the child does not know anything about himself and about others. He learns the world from the immediate environment: parents, grandmothers, grandfathers, relatives. The child absorbs and perceives criticism and approval as right and wrong, good and bad. At the same time, it does not matter in what situation the child absorbed it: they told him about his behavior or talked about someone in front of him. If the father was not criticized under the child, then in his paradigm of the world, the behavior, actions, words and actions of the father will not raise doubts. They will be true for the child, evoke the desire to imitate, learn and inherit.
Why does the child negate the role of the father?
We enter into certain forms of relationship with each person. For a child, there can only be parental relationships with parents. It is difficult for him to perceive mom and dad as a form of relationship between a man and a woman. It is difficult for him to hear from relatives that, as a man, dad does not take responsibility, cannot go to an agreement, does not make a lot of money. Hearing criticism and criticism of the father, the child forms the image of the father. I come across the fact that clients say the opinion of the father, but this opinion sounds the opinions of mothers, grandmothers, grandfathers, relatives.
In the modern world, many children are brought up without a father. Even if the father, as a man, acted badly with the mother as with a woman and does not pay attention to the child, this is not a reason to deprive the child of the father of additional criticism. It is not worth the mother and relatives to pass on to the child the pain that they experience as a result of the wrong attitude of a man to a woman.
The father can be:
- Real;
- Functional;
- Symbolic.
If there is no father, the mother can create the father symbol. The image of a worthy father to look up to. Women know very well what "real men" should be like. Through love, but not criticism (this is very important), a mother can raise a child, instilling certain qualities in boys and girls through the image of a father. Mom can give examples of masculinity and femininity through books and films. Male fathers from families of relatives and friends can also be examples of male behavior.
“And what about the father? He is not involved in my life. I haven't seen him since birth. Saying that a father just conceived is not just a word ONLY, it is a HUGE role of a father in our life. We came to this world through our biological father and mother. It was the combination of our such father and mother that gave birth to us. With another man it would be no longer us, but someone else. In addition, parents always give energy to their children. It doesn't matter where the father and mother are, they are connected with their child and energetically fill him with strength.
The father may not be in your life, but your life is!
Recommended:
The Father's Shadow: The Influence Of The Father On The Fate Of The Child
Much has been written about the influence of the mother on the fate of the child. Less commonly, the role of the father is spoken of. True, recently psychologists have been actively investigating the connection between father and child, the influence of a parent on the fate of his offspring.
MOTHER / FATHER'S HAND AND MOTHER AND FATHER'S HAND TECHNIQUES
The techniques are designed to explore relationships with mother / father, unconscious aspects of interaction in relationships, male and female aspects of personality, conflict zones in relationships with parents. In general, the diagnostic capabilities of the technique are quite wide.
Are Our Habits Our Lives?
Often, habits are contrasted with the conscious choice of an adult to do something or not to do something. On the one hand - there is truth in this - we are free to choose and control our actions. On the other hand, if we controlled our every action, every thought, every choice, we would constantly be in a situation of stress and heightened anxiety, since there are a lot of external stimuli in life.
Say A Word About A Poor Parent Or What We Bring To Our Relationship With Our Children From Our Childhood
Our ideas about the upbringing of children stem not so much from pedagogical and psychological literature as from our childhood experience. From those relationships that we developed with our own parents. We can relate to this in different ways:
Our Future Is In Our Hands As Well As In Our Thoughts. Affirmations
What is affirmation? Affirmation is a short statement phrase that, when repeated many times, fixes the required image or setting in the subconscious of a person. Affirmations use the power of positive thinking to help us achieve our goals and are like little reminders within ourselves.
