Author's Strategy For Removing Emotional Addiction

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

From the first lines of my publication, I want to confirm the immutability (including for myself) of the basic spiritual principle: LOVE is the fundamental value of the world, worthy of unconditional respect and support. To encroach on this sacred feeling is tantamount to fighting against God. Love requires the most delicate and highest attitude, as it relates to sacred matters. In this regard, I emphasize especially: my strategy has nothing to do with this heaven-blessed energy.

The technique I propose refers to the so-called painful forms of "love" that are essentially irrelevant to it. I'm talking about various types of emotional dependence that enslaves a person, makes him a "living zombie", deprives him of autonomy, self-respect, will, feeding on the suffering of others, destroying the self-worth of the giver … Such forms of "love" require psychological study and need healing.

I want to note that the strategy I propose has been successfully tested and is guaranteed to remove even long-term dependence in just a few hours of deep work.

So what are the milestones in my approach?

1. The first thing I ask a client who has come to therapy to do is to clearly formulate to me (and most importantly to myself) a balanced and firm intention to work out my addiction.

It is important to hear that the client has decided to get rid of the addiction and is ready to get started. Variants of hesitant, doubting and still hoping (and in fact not ready to work) people are filtered out and taken out of work at the first stage. The person must seriously weigh their situation, make their final choice and take personal responsibility for the upcoming therapeutic step.

2. The second stage of the work is as follows: I ask the client to give me (and most importantly - to myself) a convincing argument for the decision.

Removing addiction is giving up a big and strong feeling. This refusal must be justified by the circumstances, facts and examples of the impossibility of its promotion. Only in the case of destructive development of relations or their hopelessness ("road to nowhere" or "destructive, deceptive road"), the study of dependence has a basis, meaning. In addition, the client should be aware of the variability of the results achieved: where does his destructive attachment lead to, and what does therapy to remove emotional dependence lead to. In the case of a conscious focus on the desired result, the motivation for achievement is greatly enhanced.

3. The third step includes two stages. And it consists in alternately returning to oneself and to a partner, an imprinted (imprinted) part of oneself into the inner space of another.

We place an empty chair (or chair) in front of the client in which his codependent partner is supposedly located. And we open a sacramental dialogue between two dependent hearts.

- At the first substage of this step, we are trying to see (find) the abandoned and fixed part of our personality in someone else's heart and establish contact with it. It is important to understand what exactly makes her stay in the space of someone else's heart? For example, she really likes the passionate adoration on the part of this person, through this adoration, our part left in another person receives confirmation of its intrinsic value. Having realized the reasons for her presence in someone else's heart, we can regain our part, promising to compensate her for someone else's adoration with our own recognition and love. We ask forgiveness from our lost part for not giving her love and recognition in time, and we persuade her to return back, explaining that without her our personality will remain flawed, incomplete, and therefore unhappy. As a rule, the once lost part, having received confirmation of its value and importance to her dear heart, willingly returns home. It is necessary to accept it carefully and lovingly. Just as promised. Reimbursing her in the future the promised recognition, care, love. (In this regard, there are various techniques, for example, "Working with the inner child", which the client will do for some time necessary for him on his own after the session). Having received back our (once lost and lost in another person) part, we thank someone else's heart for so long and so diligently doing our own job of caring for the part of our subpersonality imprinted in it.

- On the second substage of the third step, by analogy with the previous work, we return the alien part of the personality imprinted in us, trying to understand what has kept it in our own heart for so long. For example, some properties of our soul that are not sufficiently represented in its native heart - purity, chastity, light. These energies were life-giving sources for the alien subpersonality and kept it in the space of our heart. Explain to the soul of the codependent partner what exactly was lacking in his subpersonality within his native space. Teach him to radiate such energies. Point to his own sources. Help them discover, open. And only then very carefully, carefully hand over to him its precious part. With assurances that from now on and forever, the returned alien subpersonality will find in its native heart everything that it so badly needed, having once left it.

The return of subpersonalities is a sacred act of transfer that requires a certain attitude and attitude. As a rule, such work is accompanied by strong emotion and is done with tears in the eyes and heart. At the same time, this is an extremely resourceful part of this strategy. First, we reclaim ourselves and become more whole. Secondly, we separate ourselves from the other, thereby removing addiction. Third, we train our unconscious in new, eco-friendly ways to retain sub-parts so that there will be no such loss in the future.

The third stage of this technique actually removes addiction, since the two former codependent partners are no longer connected by anything. The lost parts have been returned to their rightful owners, and the once disastrous channels of interaction will automatically atrophy - as unnecessary. A person who has worked through the stage of returning and exchanging parts of the personality with high quality no longer feels an acute need for a partner, the former connection remains in his memory, but not in his heart.

4. The next, fourth step of this strategy is to find ways to sublimate.

At the previous stage of work, we freed (took off) a pernicious addiction, but what to do with the long-term habit of investing in someone else, surrendering to our feelings completely, without a trace? The answer is simple: you need to find points of a new (constructive for yourself) application - in education, profession, creativity or hobby. In a field that is especially close and interesting to you. These points are acquired through self-exploration. We must remember or understand what kind of work brings us spiritual and spiritual pleasure. Having determined for ourselves a new area of possible application, we boldly and confidently implement our choice, projecting onto it our ability to dive into something with our heads, dissolving there without a trace. Usually such a realization bears fruit very soon. New love (for business, study or profession) reciprocates us. Through such nesting, we are guaranteed to be rewarded. Our passionate endeavors in this new field will justifiably bring great results. Previously, the main energy of the codependent personality was flowing into long-term suffering and sick "love", now it will work with a powerful stream for the renewed personality, rewarding its efforts.

5. Well, and the final step of this strategy is the program of finding a new formula for relational, partner love - happy, harmonious, resourceful.

At this stage, the analysis, processing and healing of the genetic (family) program is carried out. In the process of such work, destructive program schemes obtained as a result of unconscious generic transmission are investigated and cut off, and constructive schemes of generic influence are approved (strengthened). In the absence of harmonious and desirable patterns, they are specially formed and accepted by the client's personality through certain therapeutic practices.

That's the whole simple but extremely effective addiction recovery strategy. I invite everyone who wants to heal their love formula to themselves for personal therapy, and with a conscious client approach, I guarantee the maximum success of the therapeutic results.