Loose Relationship

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

An open (free) relationship is a type of relationship in which the participants want to be together, but at the same time agree to be non-monogamous. They allow romantic, sexual or other relationships with third parties. Each individual case of an open relationship may differ from another, since the specific conditions of such a relationship are determined by partners individually. Flirting, dating, kissing, or sexual intercourse can often be allowed

Most often, an open relationship can be found when the people involved in it have a romantic or sexual relationship with more than one partner at the same time. Such relationships can be both short-term (for example, dating other people) and long-term (like an open marriage).

The common opinion is that men are the initiators of free relationships. But I know of cases when women were the initiators of such relationships.

When someone declares that he / she is in an open relationship, this causes a lot of negative emotions - resentment and resentment - from those who do not accept this form of relationship.

However, if 100-200 years ago someone declared that he was a supporter of divorce and sex before marriage, it would have caused the same negative, condemning emotions from society.

That is, the current model of serial monogamy would have been immoral then, as for many now the system of open relationships is immoral.

In a pair of adults, anything that does not contradict the law is acceptable.

Price of freedom

An open relationship can be compared to walking on a tightrope over an abyss: it is exciting and very beautiful if you hold on and do not fall down. At the same time, the majority falls, and in this "fall" most often the relationship collapses, and sometimes the mental well-being of one of the partners, who was unable to cope with the surging emotions.

Fall insurance

In what case can you not fall? If you recognize the emotions that arise inside from the fact that your partner is now with someone else and, perhaps, you even see your partner's sex (for example, swinger clubs).

Quite natural emotions of pain, anger, jealousy arise from fear (often unconscious): "What if he / she likes it so much and he / she leaves me?"

If you allow yourself these feelings and allow yourself to experience them, then sooner or later you will be faced with one of two:

• you will accept for yourself that an open relationship is not for you. You deceived yourself into thinking that you were ready and coping with emotions and feelings of possessiveness towards your partner. In this case, most often it is not possible to maintain the relationship.
• you will reach a state of respect for your partner and a willingness to be with him / her, regardless of whether he / she has sex with someone else or not, but at the same time and willingness to let go of her / him.

Positive side

The feeling of possessiveness is the main reason for the extinction of sexual desire in a couple.

In couples in an open relationship, sexual interest in the partner does not diminish over time, or, if it weakens, the couple disperses in a more comfortable emotional state for each other.

But this is possible only if the partners do not deceive themselves and really lived through the emotions associated with a sense of possessiveness, and did not block them inside. Unfortunately, most people block and deceive themselves.

Have you had any experience of free relationships? If so, how did it end and is there anything that you, as a participant in such a relationship, would like to correct or add?