When You Have A New Relationship

Video: When You Have A New Relationship

Video: When You Have A New Relationship
Video: When you're new to a Relationship | Awesome Machi | English Subtitles 2024, May
When You Have A New Relationship
When You Have A New Relationship
Anonim

Sometimes good things come into your life.

For example, relationships.

And you begin to "storm" like a lonely tree on a rock during a storm.

And from the experiences it becomes so bad that you are no longer happy.

It begins to seem that it is easier to quit than to continue than to stay in this relationship, in this "horror" - surging fears, a whirlwind of desires, a whirlpool of claims and outbursts of rage that reality, despite its obvious advantages, does not coincide with expectations, frightens with memories of the failures of the past and does not turn into an ideal picture, at odds with fantasies about how you want everything to turn out.

And then you can come to a psychotherapist and share your feelings with him.

Your anxiety, your helplessness, your fears and resentments.

And to separate together with him the present from the past, the real from the fantasized, the frightening from the exciting, the secondary from the important.

And calm down, and regain the ground under your feet …

To move on.

Sometimes something desirable comes into your life.

For example, relationships.

And so everything starts well. And pictures of a wonderful future are drawn. And joint plans are eagerly built.

And then suddenly it turns out that you put different meanings into the same words. And in reality, in deeds, everything turns out quite differently than it sounded in words.

And then you can come to a psychotherapist and live with disappointment. And powerlessness. And anger. And sadness.

And figure out how it happened? And think, seek to find, how could it be otherwise? Hear yourself and others, communicate, learn, negotiate. This, and maybe not this, but next time …

And accept the status quo …

To move on.

Sometimes something nice comes into your life.

For example, relationships.

And it seems that life is about to go differently, differently, in a new way! Together with this person!

But for some reason a person decides otherwise. And leaves. And you stay with your dreams, fantasies, desires and plans. Alone.

And then you can come to a psychotherapist.

And share your pain. And anger. And despair. And sadness.

And to accept little by little the free choice of other people. And to realize that rejection is not pleasant, painful, but not fatal and life does not end.

And to notice that you are alive, but here, next to you, there is another person. Who is attentive to you, who listens to you, who cares about what is happening to you. And you are not alone.

And then notice that besides this person, there are other people around you. And some of them treat you with great interest and sympathy.

And it suddenly turns out to be interesting!

And there are strengths to move on.

*****

Maria Veresk, online psychologist, gestalt therapist.

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