2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
What is it like living a "good" life?
Are these apartments - cars - money - pleasure? I know many who can not deny themselves anything, but for some reason they do not consider their life "good", constant anxiety, the desire to run somewhere, what to do, to achieve something, more, more, more. AND? Hello depression or burnout.
This means that a "good" life is still not external.
Let me give you an example:
imagine that you are driving your car. You have to go to the right - you turn the steering wheel and go where you need to.
And here is the pit - you can see it perfectly and go around it, but here is a wonderful meadow and here you can stop and admire the nature.
And you CAN stop.
You need to overtake someone - choose the right moment for the maneuver and do it.
In general, you are driving your car. Yes, she's taking you. But you lead.
And imagine that the car does not obey you, not such a machine is controlled. Pit? well, okay, we go through the holes, the clearing - by, overtaking - you can and on the opposite lane.
How do you like this situation? It's no wonder to get nervous, and your head will ache, and your hands will shake and sink, and your stomach aches and it's difficult to breathe, the pressure goes off scale.
Panic. After all, I can't do anything, everything goes (goes) not where I need it.
I do not have time for anything.
I do not feel joy or enjoy life.
I am tense all the time, I feel worthless and frustrated.
And even panic attacks.
Everything is correct. And how else to feel if such a colossus as LIFE, rushes uncontrollably along the road and off-road. You can kill yourself …
What joy, what satisfaction, if life is constantly under threat. If there is no security.
This is what happens when you don't live your life. Life rushes by.
I think everyone knows the signs that life is not happy.
Do you know how to determine that you are living your life?
It's simple.
1. Space and freedom
You are free to express yourself, your opinion, even if it is very different from someone else's, you are free to talk about your feelings or not talk about them. You are free to choose with whom you go through life and if you are not satisfied with the people, you can drop them off. You can be free to make mistakes and give yourself the right to make mistakes, to be imperfect. You can even change the route and go the other way, and what difference does it make what people say.
2. You are YOU
You don't need to be someone smarter, more beautiful, more successful, younger, richer and all that. You are not at all interested in playing someone else's roles. You don't have to be strong and brave if you are not strong and brave at all. You can quite calmly admit that you are tired or do not know something. It doesn't make you any worse. You are you.
3. You feel the joy of life
Not "egegey", but simply "it's good that I am." It's great that I can hold this steering wheel, drive along the road, turn where I need to, stop where I want, watch and admire what interests me.
4. Other people need you
Just because you are. (Just because “It’s good that I exist”, remember?), As well as people need you as a specialist in your field. You feel this need. And this also gives the joy of life (p. 3)
5. Yes, life is not always sweet and smooth and cars sometimes need repair
But you calmly and confidently accept life as it is.
You agree that the road you are driving on has rules, speed limits, uneven surfaces, detours and turns. You don't run out of the car if you see a speed limit of 40 and you want to drive 120 km / h. You pass this section of the road calmly, don't you?
It's the same in life. We are very limited. And this is a fact that will have to learn to say YES.
6. You are friends with yourself
If a best friend comes to you, how do you feel about him? Are you happy to meet? Interested in how he is doing? Do you treat something delicious?
You treat yourself like your best friend. Even better. After all, you are your best friend.
YOU don't leave yourself in trouble. You do not run away from problems, because you have enough inner strength to face them.
7. You CAN
Not in the sense of when something, with someone, somewhere.
And the confidence that you - CAN. You can do it, you can handle it. It is important. Believe in yourself. You're your best friend, aren't you?
Alas, no one teaches us how to manage our lives. But you can and should learn. This is probably something that every person should try.
Learn to live your life.
This is in brief. I would be glad to have questions and comments.
And if you still do not have the feeling that you are in control of your life, come to consultations.
And also I conduct psychotherapy, seminars, trainings, field trainings, transformational games.
And all this little by little, gradually, teaches us to live well.
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