How Our Success Depends On The Environment

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Of course, a person's life depends primarily on himself - personal qualities, thinking, understanding, vision of the world, aspirations, desires, actions.

But man is a social being. We are born in society, live in society and die in society.

Regardless of whether we have a large circle of friends, acquaintances, how closely we are in contact with colleagues at work, whether we are sociable, or, on the contrary, lovers to be alone - we are all social beings. The society forms in us certain views - both conscious and subconscious (those that we are not aware of).

First, these are our parents, relatives, then - kindergarten, school, circle of friends, even further - college, work, and so on.

Reading this article, you may say: "What kind of society is there, I have my own head on my shoulders, I think what I want, and no one influences me."

Of course, there are a lot of logical thoughts that you and the environment have very different thoughts. But besides the logical part (mind), a person has an area of the unconscious - imprinted attitudes. They are meaningless, they are literal, and they work.

Society gives us certain norms of behavior that are not fully realized by our minds: what is good and what is bad, what is normal, what is beautiful, what is honest, what is shameful, what is right, what is mean, what is necessary, what is accepted, what is easy, what is hard, what is simple, what is difficult, what is scary …

Let's start simple.

Do you agree: if you were born in another country, for example, a Muslim, then your worldviews - how you see the world as it is for you, your thoughts - what is good, what is right, how to act, and so on - very would be very different from what you are now.

So much so that people who grew up in a different culture are fundamentally incomprehensible with close interaction. This is especially clearly seen and realized not by tourists who have visited such a country, but by those people who have moved there to live.

Let's go further.

Have you noticed that even living in the same country, in the same city, district of the city - children who grew up in different families: they look at the world in different ways, have different initiative, are successful?

A child who grew up in a family where dad is a small businessman, when he becomes an adult, also has a tendency to work not for his uncle, but not for himself.

He grew up in a family where, in order to get more money, you need to be able to think differently, you need to be able to interact well with people, you need to be able to draw conclusions from your unsuccessful actions, analyze and look for solutions, make non-standard decisions.

For such a child: risk is the norm, failure is the norm, and thinking on behalf of other people (putting yourself in their place) is the norm.

Note that the parental family also forms the child's living environment: parents have friends who are also similar to them - here are entrepreneurs, here people are leaders, and so on. The child, both in childhood and in later periods, came into contact with people who have certain forms: vision of the world, thinking, aspirations, actions, etc.

This child may not become a small businessman, like his father, but go, for example, to a good firm as a manager and become quite successful there, or first go to work as an ordinary employee in a large company, and eventually become a leader. This is because the “norms” received from the parental family help him to be more successful than the average person.

Let's take another example.

A family where dad is a builder, mom is an accountant. Dad was a builder all his life, mom was an accountant.

Both work hard and very hard, they also strive for success. Naturally, every family has its own concept of “success”.

For such parents, success is when the family has food, there are quite normal clothes, they have some kind of housing of their own, they have the opportunity to study their children at a university, go to the sea once a year, and, in general, be no worse than others.

Such a child, like most, has typical clothes, a modern mobile phone, he understands that he needs to learn, work hard to reach a certain level in the profession, and so on.

The scope of the thinking of such a person, his life goals, in general, revolve around the parental beliefs, as well as the environment with which the parents came in contact, and in which such a person is now. He will also strive to work hard at work, gain a foothold there as a good employee, will be able to have an average stable salary, which allows, apart from monthly needs, to gradually save for an apartment, to be able to travel within the country for 5 days once a year.

And if he achieves this (or a little better than his parents had) - this is his understanding of life, "the norm."

If this person has not yet reached such a level (for example, he works at work, where there is enough to live on, but not enough to save for his own home), then with his thoughts and actions he will strive:

- so that his superiors see him in this job as a good and important employee;

- as a result, his work, qualifications, diligence, reliability - were worthily appreciated in monetary terms (they gave a raise to his salary).

This is his understanding of success, a way of how to achieve financial stability, what to strive for in life.

Let's take a third example.

A poor family, my father died at the age of 30 from an accident, my mother could not find a life partner for the rest of her life, and she herself raised two children.

In childhood, money was not even always enough for food, not just clothes, or something else. Mom went through work, and over time found a more acceptable job in order to live better, so that the children were fed, dressed and also - there was an opportunity to educate the children.

She always encouraged children to develop, so that they look for the application of their talents, and find "their" job.

The son learned, worked in different jobs: as soon as he reached the ceiling in terms of professionalism or salary, he found another job where there was an opportunity for further growth in professionalism, as well as in salary.

As a result, he became a successful person: he found a life partner, earned an apartment, a car, and his wife travel to different countries once or twice a year, their children go to various circles.

Notice the influence of the environment. His childhood years were spent in poverty, the financial situation was much lower than the average family.

But the family background that this person absorbed:

- strive for the best;

- look for options, look ahead;

- not be afraid to take risks - change jobs, even the field of activity

allowed him to get out of poverty, then reach the average financial level, and go a little further.

After all, the one who takes such steps achieves more. For him, such thinking, such actions are the norm.

So now let's get back to us.

Our success to a certain extent depends on the environment in which we live.

And if the beginning of our life: the parental family, their social circle - we do not choose, then further, when we are already 18-20 years old - we just have the opportunity to choose the environment.

With whom we are friends, with whom we communicate, what kind of work environment (when choosing a job), what kind of recreation environment, hobbies, and so on we choose, then it affects us.

And there is a huge resource in this choice.

The environment can activate us to improve life, or vice versa - to sit down.

For example, we grew up in a family where the following attitudes prevailed:

- To have more money, you need to work harder.

- To be successful, you have to be a good specialist.

- Stability, reliability - that's the main thing in life.

- Rich people are unhappy, they are envied, they have no real sincere friends, they can be killed for money, they can be betrayed, they have to worry about money all the time - and this is a huge waste of nerves.

This is what your parents think, and to some extent you think so. And you work at work, you work hard, and you get $ 300. This is normal for you.

And then somewhere on vacation, you get to know a company that also happens to be from your city, you spend time together and then you start to contact upon arrival home.

It has different people, different professions, but in general, they are more successful than you.

Over time, communicating and spending leisure time with this company, you gain awareness of many things and rethink your life.

It turns out that for the work that you get at one job, working certain hours a month, in another, you can get the same amount, but work one and a half times less in time. And so you change work for another, where you also get $ 300, but it does not exhaust you so much, because less time is spent here, there is no overwork, there is no need to sit after work - to finish something, and also go to work on weekend when you need to do something urgent.

So, you realize the attitude “to have more money - you need to work harder”, you have it, and also that it is not true.

By changing your job, you can achieve such that you get the same amount and work less.

Further, when communicating with the environment, you notice that people change jobs and often discuss the fact of how to be able to present yourself to employers.

You understand what it turns out if:

- make a high-quality resume;

- be able to show yourself at the interview to the HR manager and then to the head

then you can find a job where you will receive even more, and do the same as in your current job.

And what stopped you from doing this before:

- fear that if I quit my current job and cannot find a new job, then how can I live;

- the installation that at work with a higher salary you need to give all the best, and you are not ready for this;

- the belief that working with a higher salary is more responsibility, which means more excitement, and for you it is uncomfortable.

You realized this being in an environment where such myths are easily debunked - WORKS ARE DIFFERENT:

- there are jobs where you need to work harder, more obligations, more responsibility for a higher salary;

- there are jobs where they pay more for the same volume of activity that you are doing now.

In your environment, where you were before, it is customary to communicate a lot on topics: that everything is bad, that everything is getting more expensive, that the bosses are bad, that the salary is not raised, that the government is to blame, and so on.

And in the new one it is accepted:

- if the job does not suit you - find options for how to find the best job;

- do not be afraid to take risks, because the one who takes risks gets more from life;

- to grow not only professionally, but also be able to present yourself, value yourself, be able to insist on a salary, be able to communicate with the authorities.

And over time, you change your beliefs, which were "merged" with you, for others.

And you become more successful.

As a result, I will say.

There is the first serious resource - work on yourself.

This resource helps to improve your life in various areas - from family relationships to financial success.

And there is a second serious resource - this is the ENVIRONMENT in which we live, communicate, work, relax. It carries certain stereotypes of thinking, forms of outlook on the world, on oneself, on the family, on self-realization, on success.

And this environment of our interaction significantly affects us. Substantial and IMPRINT.

I suggest you think about such a resource.

I would like to note that being in the environment carries not only mental influence - who does what, analysis, comparison, and so on. An even greater influence is exerted on us by subconscious programs that are in ourselves and which coincide or do not coincide with the environment.

If subconscious programs (attitudes, beliefs) coincide with the environment, then we are not aware of them. Therefore, we cannot change it in any way!

At the same time, being in a more successful environment than we grew up allows subconscious attitudes to emerge, to comprehend them, and then to change them to more positive ones for us.

So, if you want to become more successful you need to:

1. Want it! Very much.

2. Decide what qualities in myself I want to develop.

3. Think about where such people are who have what I want to develop in myself.

4. Find an opportunity to get into such an environment, communicate, watch, learn from such people.

I will note that often there is no energy for the above. Due to the fact that your current communication environment takes up all your energy.

And then you need to take a good and thoughtful look around, and begin to mark the people with whom you are in contact.

How much of your time is spent on this or that activity.

What sediment remains after communicating with your friend, girlfriend. What topics do you talk about, what conditions do you encounter.

For example, you have a friend with whom you like to meet and chat about how bad everything is, how the job got out, complain about your boss, your husband / wife.

You understand that this, in general, is not a good pastime, the habit of hanging in feelings of pity, condemnation - it certainly does not give you the energy to move forward.

And here, if you even want to change, you think, well, I'll start thinking a little differently. We tuned in somehow, started doing something. But here we meet again with a friend - and he again from our mood lowers us to his level. You then decided to change, he did not.

And until he decides, does not want to change himself, his life will not change. You can't really change the environment. And here it is - easily pulls you to the same level, normal for this environment.

So there is only one way out of this - to limit the circle of contacts with people who do not want to change, and to find that circle of friends that is higher than your current level.

This environment will also pull the person to a level that is normal for this environment, and insofar as this level is higher than your current one, it is for your good.

Yes, it’s not easy. These are those friends and acquaintances that are familiar to you. They will also, if possible, prevent you from changing (so you will now spend less time with them) - this is their right, but your choice is to move forward, or to stand still.

It is these people who will scare you that you are not good enough, professional, prepared to become successful. They are the ones who will tell you about the crisis and difficult times. Don't listen to them. Do not think that they deliberately wish you ill.

They simply protect you from the hardships of the world of achievement, from possible risks. Those risks that are uncomfortable for them are terrible, and so on.

But you can find other people, make acquaintances with them, communicate, even be friends with someone. We can find people who are optimistic about new beginnings, who will support you in your striving for the best, for spiritual, personal and physical self-development.

Surround yourself with people with whom you want to take an example, what you want to be, choose an environment where it will be more interesting for you, more joyful.

After all, you are the master of your life.

Use a resource like environment! Realize its power.

Realize that with the help of your environment, you can grow effectively in different aspects of life - family, creative, financial.

I wish everyone to move forward!