2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Why the coach doesn't advise"
"I don't know what to do with it … tell me what should I … how is it right … advise?"
⠀ "I don't know what about this, but I want to figure it out.."
How do you like the difference of options? In the first one, your immature part rules, which "wants a dress, on the arms and does not decide anything." And if you really let her "disperse", then there will always be someone who will decide for you: mom, boss, husband, etc. And then it will turn out, as in that cartoon about Vovka in the Far Away Kingdom: so what, will you eat for me? -
Aha, - two answer from the casket.)
And to some extent, the coach's task is to teach you to take responsibility for your life and for your decisions, to nurture and strengthen your mature part, authorship, and adulthood. Because the problem is not that you do not know the solution, but that something, for some reason, prevents you from making it. And it is important not so much to go around the "blockage" that appeared on your way, but to disassemble it, otherwise you will meet the same one later.
It does not advise, because, despite the fact that people come with similar problems, no one knows universal advice on how to cope with cheating, or how to find your Way. The coach's task is to hear what is superficial and obvious, to draw your attention to what you usually don’t pay attention to for some reason, to what kind of relationship arises between you and how it’s about your life, to ask questions that are not you always want to answer, or it will seem to you that you do not know and, most likely, you will have to face some other self and it may very well be that you will not like it. But this is a very important, crucial meeting, great if it happens. And the coach also gives you support, valuelessness. He just sees you in this way. In this period of time. And it's very cool when someone sees and accepts you for who you are. We are formed through relationships, hurt through relationships. and we are healed through them too.
And then, what is advice - it's always a story "about myself". About your experience, your map. Let's say a client comes with a request to save his family. And for a coach, family is not a value, he believes that it is even better without it and what will he advise the client? A coach is an ordinary person with knowledge, techniques, experience, but not Omnipotence. God forbid him from the desire to decide destinies and to dispose of the freedom of choice, which was originally given to each of us.
So no one except you knows which solution is the best for you, and in coaching there is an opportunity to hear it, if suddenly, amid the external rumble and cackle, your own inner voice suddenly ceased to be heard for you. Find answers. Decide on your own choices. See what's next and dare to go.
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