Moral And Ethical Standards Of The Manipulator

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Moral and ethical standards of the manipulator.

(in the process of editing and adding)

1. I don't care.

2. I do not do anything that people would not want and could do themselves.

3. I’m not lying, I’m just not telling the whole truth.

4. The one who knows a lot wants to know even more. Those who know little want to know even less.

5. Why should I care about the fate of people who do not want to learn.

The dumb ones are getting smarter, the clever ones are getting dumber. But, in spite of this, the distance between them is increasing

/ Stanislav Jerzy Lec /

If you want to establish quick and reliable contact / rapport with your opponent, earn unlimited trust and great love, then let him "teach you about life" a little.

I will not go into details and explain why, but people love it very much.

Many of us often hear and pronounce ourselves accusations such as: “does not know how to listen”; "Bad interlocutor"; “This is not a dialogue, but two monologues,” and so on.

So, let's take a mirror. Now I will try to formulate some principles that will help to guarantee the destruction of communication, loss of trust and dislike of the opponent.

1. The first group of principles

"Impudence is the second happiness"

[Well-known and well understood]

The result is guaranteed.

In any context.

1.1 Choose a mentoring tone for communication.

1.2 Give any advice and guidance when not asked to.

1.3 By all means "teach life"

1.4 Give definitions to the opponent - "Stick a label".

2. The second group of principles

[Famous and poorly understood by some]

The result is possible and highly probable.

Achtung! Attention! Attentie! Atención! Attenzione! Attention! Uwaga!

Context matters. It all depends on the context.

2.1 Phrases, the semantic meaning and hidden meaning of which: "You are a moron"

Even such seemingly innocent phrases as: “Thank you for saying / paying attention / notice / correcting / asking, etc.”, as well as “This is a very good question”, “How much can you repeat / show / ask / persuade / ask, etc. "," It is not - ethical / immoral / unprofessional / clumsy / clumsy, and - stupid / not clever, etc. " have proven themselves very well.

Any direct and indirect questions, answers and statements aimed at discrediting the mental abilities, moral, ethical and professional qualities of the opponent. And it doesn't matter whether the statement is fair or not.

2.2 "Ignore"

It doesn't matter what he says, what meaning he is trying to convey and what the opponent means. The only important thing is that we ourselves think about it. Our conclusions and interpretations, based on speculation, on our "Picture of the World" and subjective reality, are always correct and correct.

For example. “Where did you go on vacation this summer? - Nowhere! - What, there is no money? / It is clear - there is simply no money!"

2.3 "Evaluation"

To clearly and simply explain how a value judgment affects the inner state, I will call on the comparative metaphor to help.

I think that many in childhood, and some (to be honest) still love to ride on a swing.

So.

I will ask you to sit comfortably.

You can relax.

Whoever wants can close his eyes.

Those who do not want to do so may not.

Does not matter.

Good.

I ask you to remember that tender age when you first felt that unforgettable and delightful feeling, when your breath caught and your heart sank, when your body and soul rushed upward.

For some, it was three years old. For someone at five, for someone at seven, and for someone at twenty-seven. You can remember and hear how a light breeze rustles in your ears. Very well.

You can remember the feeling when the wind gently caresses your face and hair …

(But okay. Good. About the techniques of introducing into a trance and hypnotherapy, some other time).

Consider this mechanism (with a swing).

Figuratively speaking. The speaker (at the top) is internally leading. The listener (below) is forced to feel internal discomfort. But, when there are no reasonable objections and serious counterarguments, the simplest method is used to align (swing) positions, or to swap places. Namely - "Assessment".

This increases our self-esteem and supposedly aligns or changes our positions.

It is as if on a swing, all the time I wanted to quickly push myself off the ground and be on top. And how unpleasant it was to feel the "fall". Remember how some supposedly jokingly tried to balance the swing. And they remained standing on outstretched legs. And others, in order to quickly overthrow the boy or girl sitting opposite, and get themselves upstairs, sharply kicked off the ground with their feet. Why the opponent used to hit the swing with his ass.

So it is with the "Appraisal". At first glance, this is a natural mechanism for aligning positions.

"Positive Evaluation", such as - "That's right; Right; I support; Fair; I agree, etc. " - supposedly equalizes positions.

“Negative Assessment”, such as “Delirium; Nonsense; Nonsense, Not a fact; Doubtful, etc. - allegedly strengthens (raises) the position.

But this is "Pyrrhic Victory".

"A Pyrrhic victory is still Victoria: get rid of both enemies and our own in one fell swoop."

/ Stanislav Jerzy Lec /

2.4 "Self-centered skimping on the declared topic"

Using the opponent's information to talk about a topic of interest, useful and important, only for yourself.

For a more detailed consideration, I use the well-known formula about "Thomas and Erema" for a specific example.

Let's admit. The opponent says that he bought a BMW car, model X6 (married / expecting a child / got a dog or a cat / vacationed in Cyprus / whatever).

I tell him that the car is great, but better …

2.4.1 "He told me about Thomas, and I told him about Erema."

(different brand / different model / motorcycle / boat / scooter / airplane / etc. - another object)

(walking / lying on the couch / jumping rope / hang-gliding / scuba diving / etc. - another action with another object)

2.4.2 "He told me about Thomas, and I told him about certain details of Thomas, in particular"

(color / number of doors / engine size / etc - detail of this object)

2.4.3 "He told me about Thomas, and I told him about everyone in the world Thomas, in general"

(go fishing / glue heifers / plump in the garage / - another action with this object)

3. The third group of principles

[Little known and unrecognized]

The result is unpredictable.

In all contexts.

This group of not fully understood, genetic and social, verbal and non-verbal signs and differences of Homo.

There should be many letters at this place.

If the group of first principles is almost guaranteed to lead to the termination of communication, then the second group of principles does not always break communication, but significantly weakens the Rapport.