2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
One of the most important personal resources of a person is his ability to love, which is felt as a constantly present factor inside a person.
Abraham Maslow identifies two types of love with which a person gets acquainted during his life: genuine and fake.
Man has the capacity for true love from birth. Sensitive people, looking into the eyes of babies, can feel such a nagging feeling of tenderness and longing for something painfully familiar and important … but forgotten. After all, what is given to an infant from birth to a year is a temporary gift that must be lost in order to find what was lost through painstaking work of the entire subsequent life.
This wonderful feeling is lost with our first steps, the first words - with the development of our ego consciousness. After all, as soon as we begin to realize our “Ego” (our “I”), we immediately begin to experience an acute shortage of everything - a shortage of resources, time, attention, etc., and we develop in ourselves the ability to love that will help eliminate this deficit. We get scared that something is not enough. It seems to us that the resources in the world are limited and we need to fight for them. Bite your teeth into every piece to survive.
This deficiency love is selfish and selfish. It is addressed to others because they condition the satisfaction of our needs. And the more our needs are satisfied, the more this type of love becomes, because scarce love is insatiable.
But as we gain confidence in ourselves and in the world, we again begin to understand that we and the world are one whole and we have nothing to fear. That the world is abundant and there are enough resources for everyone. And only then do we begin to develop in ourselves the ability for true, perfect love - existential love.
Being love is love for the essence of another person or the World. This love is not characterized by the desire for complete possession of the object of love, it is more connected with the good that is in another person than with its own satisfaction. Often, when describing existential love, Maslow cites an example of non-interference adopted in Taoism or the principle "let everything be as it is" - approval of what is, without the desire to change or improve something. This love comes with a deep understanding that Live = Love. And all that was before - and not love at all.
With such love, love for nature, for example, can be expressed in the fact that a person admires the beauty of flowers and leaves them to grow in the garden (with scarce love, a person will most likely make a bouquet of them). Selfless love for one's child (when the child's shortcomings are loved and accepted) also belongs to being love.
Existence love is the love of a person who has managed to realize himself (whose needs for security, belonging, love, respect and self-esteem are satisfied). Such a person does not experience a deficit need and loves because love is inherent in him, it is a part of his being and he cannot do otherwise. He loves as if everything in this world is perfect.
Such love does not require and is able to admire the object of love, allowing him to be himself, surrounding him with care and not subjecting him to evaluation and criticism.
Existence love is richer, it gives more satisfaction and lasts longer, it always remains new, in contrast to scarce love, which eventually loses its novelty. She is creative and does not ask for anything in return. The reward in such love is the recognition of the very essence and beauty of the object of love.
At this moment, we, as a rule, suddenly realize that we have gained what was once lost - this is how the feelings of a small child who smiles at the World return to us. And the World smiles at him.
Recommended:
Ability To Say No, Boundaries
I CAN SAY NO, CAN YOU? You know, my dears, for me the ability to say “no” is one of the surest signs of a healthy human psyche. I do not take egoists and “consumers” as an example (they have the other extreme). After all, it is the ability to refuse that speaks of the adequate boundaries of a person.
Where Does The Ability To Love Yourself Come From. My Inner Child
I'm here. I'm near. I will see you I will hear you I will notice you Merry, sad, angry Don't be afraid, I'm with you. I'm happy that I have you. First of all, to love yourself is to be. I am, I am. At the level of sensations.
Types Of Love And Their Difference: Passion, Falling In Love, Love Addiction, Absolute, Mature Love
Love … A word familiar from childhood. Everyone understands that when you are loved is good, but when you are deprived of love, it is bad. Only everyone understands it in their own way. Often this word is used to refer to something that turns out to be not quite love or not love at all.
The Eternal Themes "Love" And "Money": How The Shadow Of The "Curmudgeon" Limits The Ability To "work, Create And Love"
For some time I have been actively working with the topic "Archetypes and Shadows" both in client requests and in my own. Some developments began to appear. I want to share. Perhaps you will find something interesting for yourself.
Love Is An Ability
Love is an ability. And not every person has it. Just like not everyone has an ear for music or good physical fitness. Love is actions, it has many manifestations besides words. Love is more than duty and responsibility. Love is the ability to care.
