2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Love is an ability. And not every person has it.
Just like not everyone has an ear for music or good physical fitness. Love is actions, it has many manifestations besides words.
Love is more than duty and responsibility. Love is the ability to care. When you are angry, choose words, make an effort on yourself, hold back steam, hands and voice. At the same time, say what is important. But carefully choosing the shape. Because you love and care.
When you are tired or feel bad, you make an inner effort, you understand your head. You disperse "cockroaches", you understand - you are tired, so I want to rest, so I can ask for help or calmly refuse. And not just feeling something unpleasant inside to come home and vomit it all on the one you “love”. No, love protects. First, I will understand what is with me, what I want and how I can alleviate my condition, and then I will approach my beloved. Because only I myself am responsible for what happens in my head and my body. It is my job to do myself well, not at the expense of another.
If I miss, I say so. And I don’t start to get angry, why is my partner so stupid that he still hasn’t done me well? I miss, so I talk about it and call. It is up to the other person to respond or not.
If I love, then I'm wondering about a person. What fairy tales did he love, what he was afraid of, whom he hated, whom he loved, what he dreamed of, what he wants now and who is he - my beloved person? I do not tell him what he needs to be in order for me to feel good. I wonder what he is. It's only children who don't care what kind of mother they are, they need their mother to satisfy all, all needs. And if an adult uncle / adult aunt, then in general it should be interesting if they are broadcasting about love.
Love forgives a lot. Because love is not power. When I own a thing, of course I make it as user-friendly as possible, otherwise why? And if I love a person, I see him as a whole: with his habits, character, desires and needs, with his limitations. And it is normal for me that he cannot do something, that he does not know how, that he does not cope well. Because I do not own, because this is not a thing and not a function. This is a living person with his own history.
Love is the desire to touch. I want to express love, to share. A loved one is someone who looks good, smells good, and feels good to touch. Can you imagine that the mother was unpleasant to touch the child, or did not want to? In true love, there is always bodily contact. Even if you are a visual, audial, and generally not used to calf tenderness. If love is true - then I WANT! And if something else, which is simply called the same word, then criticism, disgust, coldness, nagging. Because it is not loved.
Love is trust. When I can say what I think, I feel. And do not be afraid that it will "fly in" for it. I can show myself as a real person, and not only from beautiful sides. This is trust. And not self-confidence - "I am the queen", will not go anywhere from me. And when I can be not beautiful, not cheerful, not obsequious, sick, weak. And this will be accepted as simple human manifestations.
Love is intimacy. Emotional, warm, calm, gentle. This is when I react to his changes. Something happened to him - I will feel it when I see it. And even more so I will feel that the intimacy is gone. Many things cease to be noticeable when intimacy leaves and there is no love. If a lie appears, the trace of intimacy is gone. In proximity, everything is felt, everything is heard. Sometimes without words.
Love doesn't go away. When hormone levels decrease, passion subsides. But that warm, deep, tender - remains! The closeness will remain. There will be periods of increasing distance. But these are only periods, crises. Warm, tender affection, respect, desire to touch will remain unchanged, and passion and enthusiasm will return in waves. Only falling in love, nurtured by hormones and childhood traumas, is irrevocably gone. Recently I heard a story from an elderly woman: "I still have a yoke in my stomach when my grandfather takes my hand."
The present remains. Not by itself. Two keep it. Take care. If they have this ability.
Someone is lucky right away, someone after different experiences, and someone is still not able to …
Recommended:
Ability To Say No, Boundaries
I CAN SAY NO, CAN YOU? You know, my dears, for me the ability to say “no” is one of the surest signs of a healthy human psyche. I do not take egoists and “consumers” as an example (they have the other extreme). After all, it is the ability to refuse that speaks of the adequate boundaries of a person.
Ability To Love
One of the most important personal resources of a person is his ability to love, which is felt as a constantly present factor inside a person. Abraham Maslow identifies two types of love with which a person gets acquainted during his life:
Where Does The Ability To Love Yourself Come From. My Inner Child
I'm here. I'm near. I will see you I will hear you I will notice you Merry, sad, angry Don't be afraid, I'm with you. I'm happy that I have you. First of all, to love yourself is to be. I am, I am. At the level of sensations.
Types Of Love And Their Difference: Passion, Falling In Love, Love Addiction, Absolute, Mature Love
Love … A word familiar from childhood. Everyone understands that when you are loved is good, but when you are deprived of love, it is bad. Only everyone understands it in their own way. Often this word is used to refer to something that turns out to be not quite love or not love at all.
The Eternal Themes "Love" And "Money": How The Shadow Of The "Curmudgeon" Limits The Ability To "work, Create And Love"
For some time I have been actively working with the topic "Archetypes and Shadows" both in client requests and in my own. Some developments began to appear. I want to share. Perhaps you will find something interesting for yourself.
