2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
If a person is given a chance in a relationship, he will definitely use it. Especially if this is a chance this relationship is to screw up. Oh sorry. Let it go
I have not yet met a person who would not like to have a close relationship. I didn’t “couldn’t, tired of searching,” namely, I wouldn’t want to. No close relationship. At heart, even the most severe and skeptical needs someone close.
In fact, really screwing up close relationships is not an easy task. Here you still need to try. Because a truly close person is a stubborn individual and, right after the first call, he does not want to be pissed off and is persistently trying to understand, forgive and help you. But there would be a desire, right? If your motto is "fight and seek, find and hide," then here are a couple of simple rules for arming.
One of the proven rules is a system of double standards. This means that you can do what is shame and disgrace for your partner. For example, if you are a vivid carrier of testosterone and the scrotum, then you can flirt, sleep with other women, because this is just a call of nature. But your feminine - by no means, because she is a future mother (for example). Or you can safely buy the last iPhone on the very first day of sales for two thousand bucks, and a dress for your wife for two thousand, but hryvnia means living beyond your means, because she is not such a cool private entrepreneur, but a teacher at school.
You can still do this. Don't say anything directly. Let him figure it out. Because a loved one is like a mother, he knows you better than anyone else and is obliged to understand the whole gamut from just one raised eyebrow. Don't say that you are hurt, hurt, jealous, or angry. Passive aggression is the best way to induce active aggression and at the same time remain in a white coat and in the most advantageous position. Then, when the degree is already heating up well, accuse you of insensitivity, stubbornness, unwillingness and unwillingness to understand your subtle mental organization. Do not take your modest contribution to the escalation of the conflict under any guise.
Adopt gaslighting. Raised your voice, speak out aggressively? It seemed. Humiliating jokes, ridiculed in the presence of friends? You're overreacting, it's just a joke. In general, everything is all right with you, the second side needs to heal the nerves and generally go to a psychotherapist. This, by the way, can significantly reduce your efforts and the partner will fall off like an autumn leaf himself.
There is only one problem with all of these points. If you suddenly, by a happy coincidence, fell on a person with a well-defined masochistic radical, it will not be so easy to get rid of him.
But what if the relationship is just perfect? If you work and travel together, and you went through life crises together. If they understand you perfectly, they calmly relate to your weaknesses and frank shortcomings. Find another, more recent object for adoration, repeat like a mantra "it's not about you, but about me" or "just the feelings are not the same." So the partner will have no chance of influencing anything. But here remember: any lover (lover) is always better, more understanding, more loyal to a permanent partner, until the status on Facebook has changed from “everything is difficult” to “in a relationship” "Perhaps, after some time, this trick will have to be repeated.
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