2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Outwardly, the family has everything … Everything is beautifully "packed" and available: husband, wife, children, material wealth, in a word, everything seems to be safe.
But this is only a facade, a shell, so to speak. And inside there is emptiness, there is no spiritual closeness and truly common interests, there is no mutual dialogue, sparkling joint laughter, and for a long time there is no curiosity and surprise at each other.
It’s like a book that I’ve already read several times, far and wide. And nothing new … Doesn't ignite, does not captivate, does not inspire. And even causes boredom, body aches from the monotony and routine … Up to nausea.
And then there comes a way out, yes, quite a socially approved way out that can justify everything - work.
"Work, work go to Fedot …")
Working, earning money for a living, for a family, for the development of children, you can, after all, live your own life. And with your loved ones to be, for example, in a very superficial relationship.
Fulfilling, at the same time, his parental duty to children - to pay for their mugs, clothes, food, buying various toys. And not to have a really close relationship with them.
Relationships in which there is a place for trust, understanding, warmth, unhurried feeling of each other …
When you want to create something together, it doesn't matter what. And just to be close, to listen to each other. And … to hear what the other wanted to say.
Sometimes it's easier to "work hard" at work, bring money home and … how to pay off. Because there is nothing more to give. There is nothing to share. After all, the soul is empty. And next to it - inexpressibly boring, not interesting.
Why does this happen? Possibly a traumatic emotional experience. The experience of painful intimacy and unbearable childhood experiences. Or another banal option is cooling between spouses.
And then what - to get a divorce? What about children? And what has been acquired? And you can't divorce children either. And it happens that with them somehow it does not add up about intimacy.
Then work again "saves" from relationships, from the inability to clarify for oneself the difficulties associated with intimacy, trust and love …
Yes, there are such phenomena in family relationships, alas.
When it's more lonely together than apart …
In general, work in such cases distracts from personal difficulties and problems. And it can even promote career growth. After all, all the energy is directed at achieving and strengthening not close relationships, but professional ones.
At work, relationships are also built, but they are not family, not close. And therefore not so valuable. You can always leave them, interrupt them, and this is at least less painful than if you do it in the family.
The more tension arises in the family, misunderstandings, quarrels, alienation, the more you want and can grow and develop in work, directing there almost all your potential.
And … work thanks. She pays with money, recognition, encourages various benefits, interesting meetings, friendly contacts with colleagues, in which you can also draw some kind of closeness for yourself. Without which it is generally unthinkable to live.
Otherwise, you can become a robot, a functional. Who only eats, sleeps, works. And it works again … Works a lot. To go to work, as a salvation from intolerable, intolerable relationships with loved ones and at the same time, people so distant to you …
Feelings, emotions, experiences, at the same time, are hidden far, far inside. And it is not even possible to share them with someone in the family.
Work, in this case, acts as a kind of replacement or substitution for close relationships.
Is there anything you can do in this case?
Of course, only each star emits its light and warmth … And it lights up from its individual inner impulse, from its unique inspiring energy, nourished from within only by its own unique way.
Similarly, each problem can be resolved completely ambiguously and individually.
After all, she is connected, first of all, with her inner light and warmth …)
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