2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Instead of a constructive dialogue, again only complaints, accusations and quarrels?
So, you were talking wrong!
Where there are two, there is always a difference of opinion. If there are misunderstandings, or something you don't like in the partner's behavior, this should be clarified immediately.
This should be done without accusations and insults. After all, you really want to solve the problem and improve your relationship? Then you cannot manipulate and humiliate your partner!
Tune in positively. Formulate the discussion questions with confidence and clarity.
Remember, you want to resolve the conflict, not blame.
Almost everything can be fixed if you know how to talk. Talk only about yourself, about your emotions, desires and needs (I am a message), instead of claims (You are a message). Clearly indicate what you don't like, discuss issues that bother you. After all, not doing this on time, we accumulate grievances and claims, endure disappointment due to unjustified expectations and lower our self-esteem.
Do we remember how important healthy self-esteem is?
Think your partner is having a hard time, too. Maybe he has a difficult situation at work, which he does not tell you about, so as not to bother?
The conversation pattern is very important: for example, your partner works hard so that the family does not need anything, and you want him to spend more time with you.
Start not with reproach, but with the fact that you love him and miss him. And you want him to spend more time with you and the children. Show concern - say that you are worried, because he works so hard and this can badly affect his health. Invite your partner to think, maybe he will somehow revise his schedule.
Forgiveness begins when we stop following only the reactions of a partner, looking back at the assessment of our behavior, competing or proving something. Often, in stress, men do not take any action to solve the problem, because they do not know what can help you now and are afraid to make it worse. It's important to talk to your partner about what actions they take to make you feel more comfortable. And when he is sure that it will help, he will take action.
Remember - talking is about solving problems, not creating problems! There is no need to be afraid of the quarrels that sometimes arise. You are gaining the skill to resolve conflicts in relationships. The skill is very important, because people often leave because of the lack of the ability to conduct a conversation and discuss the issues that have arisen.
As a last resort, if you can't talk at all, write a letter to your partner
Letters are one of the most effective means of communication.
If it is difficult to cope on your own, then contact a specialist.
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