2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
The fifteenth habit of a healthy person is the habit of asking openly for what you need.
There was such a great blockbuster (though I don’t remember the name), and there was this phrase: “ask and it will be given to you”. I don’t remember the name of that blockbuster, but the phrase in my head was postponed one hundred percent. After all, this phrase reflects the behavior of a healthy person in a relationship. True, in real life, viruses interfere with this amazing phrase. The most natural viruses.
"I'll do it all myself" virus
In fact, many people in the modern world are carriers of the "I'll do it all myself" virus. I will break into a cake, I will break on the British flag, but I will not ask anyone for anything. Such a powerful free and independent pride. Which originates from … the usual limiting belief that parents hammer into their heads so that … a smaller child would ask them …
The request-is-weakness virus
And this virus is no longer about independence, it is already a virus of the illusion of power and strength. The carriers of this virus want to appear as strong as possible. And they ask “beggars on the porch”. Or “it's beneath my dignity” to ask for something. Or “I will not humiliate myself and cave in” to other people. That is, we are talking about the same limiting beliefs, but only about those that revolve around a mythical inner strength.
The "everything should be natural" virus
But this virus actively infects the champions of purity in relationships. More precisely, purity and initiative. These people are waiting. They expect those around them to guess what they need. Or waiters want to believe that those around them are as educated as they are waiting, and the same things are valuable to them. And that is why those around them will GIVE what the waiters want (and when they want it) sincerely and without unnecessary reminders. Why do others need it? The answer in their heads usually sounds like "so right" or "well, I do so."
What do you need to ask for something? Just realize your desire, voice it and give others the opportunity to participate in your desire. Yes, others can refuse. So what? A request is always a chance … Moreover, for two.
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