2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
There are people who choose to help others with their Life Path and their profession. True, they pretty soon understand, due to complete immersion in the process of helping their neighbor, that their initial motivations fail, do not always lead to positive changes and not in the quantities that they would like and that the "drowning man" is somehow not in a hurry … then … to grab onto the circle that is continually thrown at him. Then the rescuers reconsider their beliefs and, most likely, come to such surprising conclusions:
SALVATION OF THE DROWNERS is the work of the drowning people themselves. It is useless to help a person if he himself does not want to help himself. This can be seen quite quickly by the lack of positive changes in the life of this person. He has his own head on his shoulders, even if he uses it. Why wear his own? You give your time, money, health, hope…. and the results are scanty. But you could spend all this on yourself. Understand, this is HIS life, he himself chose it (No? Then he would have changed everything for a long time, and if he does not change, then there is no strength or desire, there is no way to help from the outside). And his choice, albeit so strange, must be respected and recognized.
HELPING someone who helps someone acts as an aggressor, and the one to whom he helps becomes a victim. When the victim has been helped, the game begins anew, only now the roles change. Therefore, they do not seek from goodness. Yes. And yet, on this occasion, it is better to remove the words "help, help" from the lexicon altogether, and veil the process of help so carefully and well that the "victim" thinks that she is doing everything herself. And of course, it's better not to think about any praise and gratitude in your address.
Weak people are weak because they do not have the strength to change something, inside they are empty, they constantly whine and whine. This process is eternal ….. Helping such people, a person will take more problems on his head than will really benefit another. Weak people are energy vampires, they will never have enough: your attention, time, money, strength …. They regard "donors" as nothing more than a resource, even if they do not realize it. With this in mind, do not allow a weak person to parasitize on yourself and do not confuse yourself with Mother Teresa, she had a completely unique mission on Earth. If God did not personally appear to you and did not give such a mission, then you have a different one.
By helping peers, you plead for their dignity and undermine self-confidence. Moreover, an adequate, reasonable person, equal to you in strength of mind, will get angry with you if you notice to help him actively presenting the very act of helping … and will do the right thing.
And the strong do not need help. They need moral, positive support and admiration.
How to be?
- Be healthy selfish and think of yourself first. This is an absolutely normal condition! You need to see your benefit in everything. If it is not there, then determine for yourself how long and in what quantities you are ready to engage in altruism, so that then there would be no one to blame except yourself. "Save yourself and thousands around you" (Bible) … because the prerogative of human salvation should remain only with God, if you do not believe in God, it is certainly not with you anyway.
- From the first conclusion follows the second: well, in any way, if you are not God, you cannot know for sure everything to the smallest detail about the life of another person, what is in his head, how he thinks, what kind of relationship he has with other people, even if it is yours blood relative with whom you live under the same roof. Therefore, if he found himself in a swamp or in a problem, then it is likely that he deserved it and does not need to sympathize with him, and he should bear the punishment for this alone and understand FOR HIM, HIS problem is not needed - in all three cases you will be tied to bear with him HIS cross (according to the principle of energy exchange and the formation of karmic connections), respectively, and "get on the head" from the Universe will be together, if you do not solve the problem.
- If you cannot one hundred percent refer yourself to a psychologist, guru, Teacher, etc. the most sensible reaction on your part towards your neighbor would be SUPPORT. Normal moral support, no fanaticism. Here, too, it is better to be guided by healthy egoism, because you can support in different ways and each time will depend on the situation.
This article is dedicated to everyone who loves themselves, who value personal time and who wants to stay healthy.
Recommended:
Why You Never Had A Relationship, Even If You Are Sure You Are And Have Been
Every time I come across a client's problem: distrust, distrust, fear of close relationships. I already want to scream, but I can't scream: most of you just never had a close relationship , there was never a relationship at all. How can you be afraid of a relationship if there was none?
How To Stop Criticizing Yourself And Start Supporting Yourself? And Why Can't The Therapist Tell You How Quickly He Can Help You?
The habit of self-criticism is one of the most destructive habits for a person's well-being. For internal well-being, first of all. On the outside, a person can look good and even successful. And inside - to feel like a nonentity that cannot cope with its life.
We Take Off The Masks. How To Learn To Accept Yourself, And Not Always Please Everyone And Remake Yourself
We are so stuffed with different patterns, strangers' expectations, strangers must and must, that in this maelstrom we lose touch with ourselves. We plunge into the eternal race “how to please everyone, please, be good for everyone,” that we do not notice how we ignore ourselves - true, genuine, living.
Do You Need To “understand” The Manipulator? And Is That Enough?
Manipulations arise at the place of unmet need. Manipulation is a roundabout, roundabout way of satisfying some internal need or desire. The method is energy-consuming, exhausting. Often a person has to spend the lion's share of his life energy on manipulation.
What Do You Allow Yourself !? And You Call Yourself A Psychologist
Good afternoon dear friends! We continue to develop the topic about therapy, about its stages, about the attitude to the client's therapy at its different stages. A couple of days ago I mentioned that there is a phase when the therapist and the client start working on the "