2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Growth is always about overcoming. Therefore, there is not a single child who would grow up without scratches and abrasions, who would not get into unpleasant stories. All this is normal and natural. However, today we will talk about those situations that do not transform into a useful experience for the baby, but, on the contrary, can become an obstacle to his development - about psychological trauma
What is trauma?
Trauma is those experiences of a child that he perceives as a threat to his life, when his internal psychological resources did not cope and could not process what he was forced to face.
Any, even not particularly significant, event that occurs at a difficult moment for a child (crisis, after an illness or conflict, etc.) can become traumatic for him. The realization that a child cannot control his personality, life, that he did not cope, is already a trauma for him. He loses strength and faith in himself, experiences his own helplessness. Trauma can happen to a three-year-old or to a schoolchild - there is no age limit.
A small person can receive deep trauma during a war, natural disasters, natural disasters, or with the loss of significant loved ones. You can face a traumatic situation once or many times - it all depends on the strength of the impact and the inner strength of the child.
It is important to understand that a traumatic situation can occur even in non-life-threatening conditions. This can be a manifestation of domestic violence, ridicule from classmates, a once heard quarrel between parents, or repeated humiliation.
Trauma can break character. But if it turns out to survive and work out, temper him. Unfortunately, parents cannot predict what the unpleasant situation for the child will result in - stressful or traumatic.
How to recognize psychological trauma in a child? How to understand whether the situation was traumatic for the baby or not?
The child overcomes stress if:
- continues to freely communicate and express their desires;
- sometimes it does not obey you and knows how to say no;
- rarely gets sick;
- does not avoid contact with relatives;
- he has friends or contemporaries close to him in spirit.
If the baby behaves like this, then there is nothing to worry about.
The child has suffered a traumatic situation that he could not survive if:
- changed their habits;
- started to eat more or refuses to eat;
shudders at night or has difficulty falling asleep;
- is very selective towards peers in communication and friendship;
- obeys you implicitly, agrees to everything;
- has become very loving or, conversely, prone to loneliness;
- has become aggressive or passive, lazy.
These are all alarm bells that cannot be ignored.
Over time, or immediately after the traumatic event, the child may develop symptoms of unlived trauma. They can be expressed through psychosomatics, illness, decreased interest in activities or "getting stuck" in gadgets, as well as emotionlessness, indifference to the emotions and pain of others.
Overcoming psychotrauma
If you notice signs of psychological trauma in your son or daughter, it is important to act the sooner the better.
The help of a specialist will not be superfluous, but there are things that parents can and should do on their own to help their child
1. An atmosphere of trust
To begin with, the main thing is to create the most trusting atmosphere, let the child know that he can safely talk to you about what is bothering him. When he's ready to talk, pause, don't interrupt or rush him.
If the child wants to cry, let him release all the emotions. This will be the beginning of healing. Through tears, those experiences can come out that are difficult for a child to understand and voice. Moreover, if the baby is not crying, this is a reason to worry.
2. The opportunity to speak out
Talking out is the next step. Don't block childhood memories, let your child talk about it as much as he needs to. It is better to remember and discuss what happened more often, explaining its reason, than to block these experiences. Clarity helps in overcoming.
3. Processing emotions
Anything that can transform negative experiences will help to recycle the traumatic experience. For example, art therapy: draw a picture, come up with a fairy tale, sculpt something out of plasticine. You can play a negative situation and just be with the child in this process. This may already calm him down.
4. Physical activity
An important condition for "recovery" is the removal of blocks and clamps from the body. They always appear in psychotrauma. This will help games in nature, sports, walks, etc.
If all this does not help, seek help from a specialist without delay. Old injuries are more difficult to treat, so don't delay.
Of course, as parents, we do not want our children to be traumatized. But we must come to terms with the fact that it does not always depend on us. Help your child live and gain new experience, believe in yourself and your strengths, be a support for him, and then any, even not the easiest, situation is surmountable. Love yourself and your children and be happy!
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