2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
People often have questions - what is manipulation? How is manipulation different from constructive advice, constructive criticism?
To understand these issues, first of all, let us define the fact that different people differ in their suggestability, i.e. suggestibility. Knowing these features of a person, a manipulator (in this context, a suggestion), using various tricks, can change a person's behavior (in this context, a suggestion).
Let us dwell on such a manipulative trick as destructive criticism.
Using his own, possibly selfish, mercantile goals, the suggestor can use destructive criticism, trying to disarm the suggestion. These can be phrases "shame on you", "you are always like this", "you always act meanly", "you will never change", etc. phrases that give peremptory value judgments that devalue the suggestion. It is necessary to understand that destructive criticism refers to manipulative tricks and includes techniques not only for devaluing the suggestion itself, his personality and his loved ones, unfounded reproaches ("all your relatives are like that", "you are from a family of alcoholics (drug addicts, parasites)", etc.). NS.
Constructive criticism at its core contains the desire of the suggestor to help the suggestion improve something without damaging his self-esteem and self-esteem. When carrying out constructive criticism, it is necessary to take into account the fact that at the beginning of the phrase there should be a characteristic (only necessarily not fictional, but real) of any character trait or personality trait of a person. For example, to the husband: "I like how well you cook pilaf, you can only cook pilaf so deliciously."
At the same time, constructive criticism includes an indication of one any shortcoming that can be corrected. For example, to your son: “Try to do it yourself, don't wait until I come home from work.
In a situation where you have been subjected to destructive criticism and it haunts you, it would be advisable to use the recommendations:
1. Listen to criticism that includes peremptory, devaluating criticism calmly.
2. Think - why the person told you negative information, what his intrapersonal problem provoked criticism.
3. Write down the words and phrases that threw you out of balance.
4. Analyze - whether there was such criticism from reference persons in childhood. (These phrases can be worked out under the guidance of a psychologist)
5. Write counterarguments to counter the phrases you said.
6. Write a letter to the Suggestor. Then burn it or tear it.
Dear readers, thank you for your attention to my articles
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