Who Stole The Joy Of Life?

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Writer and psychologist Sarah Hansen has compiled a list of 50 factors that always affect the psychological state negatively

You worry all the time

Worry is like a rocking chair that moves feverishly but doesn't go anywhere. You simply cannot control your actions. Relax and concentrate. Calmness will help you make the right decision. In the end, it is sung very faithfully in the famous song: “Don’t worry, be happy”.

You want to be in control

Sometimes people think they jumped straight out of superhero comics. They believe that they are able to control absolutely everything. Any plan of theirs must be implemented immediately. You know, such a task is hardly within the power of even Superman. The reality is that we have no way to control anything but ourselves. Accept it, and you can enjoy what is happening without constantly trying to do the impossible.

You are offended

Taking offense is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die. You only harm yourself by accumulating negative energy. Letting go of the situation is good for you. Understand that your abuser is most likely enjoying life and does not think about you at all, while you spend your precious hours on mentally sending him death rays.

You think everyone should play by your rules

News of the day: The world has no idea about your rules. The sooner you realize this, the happier you will be. No other person has received your memo on how to live, treat you, do their job, and build relationships. People are often angry that someone does not want to live up to their inner ideals. And, naturally, the solution to the daunting task - to make everyone live according to their own measure - brings a lot of disappointment. Accept people for who they are and appreciate the full range of ideas and perspectives.

You compare yourself to others

We all play this game - we take some tiny part of another person's life and compare it with ours. For example, I can compare myself with Plushenko and conclude that I am very bad at skating. But who knows, maybe I sing better or drive a car? That is why this kind of microscopic examination of yourself and others is a pointless exercise. The whole will always be larger than the part that you are considering, but you will constantly be dissatisfied with comparing only individual elements. If you can't resist the comparison, direct it inward: are you better today than you were yesterday?

You think that fulfilling your dreams will make you happy

One says: "I will be happy when I make one hundred million dollars," and the second: "I will be happy when my family gathers for a delicious dinner today." Which one is happier? Of course, having big goals is great. But when you associate your happiness only with future successes - which, by the way, may not happen - you cannot enjoy today. Find what will delight you today and let tomorrow surprise you.

You are "a glass that is half empty"

If you are a pessimist, you only notice the bad things in your life. Your perception becomes your reality. Try to focus on the best qualities of people and the good things around. The more you see sunlight, the less shadows you will notice.

You are alone

Man is a social being, and you can't get away from it. If you find yourself lonely and depressed one Saturday night, try to change that. How do you usually find friends? Try going to public places where there are people who share your interests and beliefs. Smile, reach out, and be truly interested in the other person. You will be surprised how much this will help you in building long-term relationships.

You attach too much importance to money

Money makes life better and easier, to be sure, but it doesn't bring happiness. Think if tomorrow was the last day of your life, would you really spend the rest of your time making money? Most likely, you would like to spend these hours with loved ones or doing what you love. Living in accordance with inner goals is more enjoyable than all the money in the world.

You don’t find time for the right things

Sometimes we all feel lost. But only building our activities in accordance with inner values makes us happier. Here's a simple exercise: List your values and rank them in order of importance to you. Then compare how many of your daily activities align with your values. Are there any deviations? What can you do to change this?

You are surrounded by unhappy people

You are the sum of the five people you spend the most time with. If your friends are a constant source of negativity, then it's time to look for more positive people.

You haven't found your destination

Lots of people have signed up to the lie that their raison d'être is to live until the weekend. No wonder there are so many unfortunate life-breeders in the world. Stop existing and start living. Find your destiny and strive for it with all your passion. Sometimes it will be difficult, sometimes it will be scary, but believe me - this will be the most exciting adventure on your way.

You are an actor, not an author

You are doing the world a disservice when you try to be who you are not. By playing someone else's role, you can never live up to your own expectations. Some part of your consciousness will always know that you have suppressed yourself in order to read lines that you did not write and - even worse - that you do not believe in.

You are stuck in your past

Many people become a product of their past - the sum of regrets, sorrows and all kinds of "what ifs." Yes, you can learn from the mistakes of the past, but you cannot change or relive it. Live in the present - this is the only way to get to the future.

You live with thoughts of the future

Some people think that happiness is the destination, although in reality it is only the road to it that gives us a sense of the fullness of life. Think of it as an adventure. If you don’t do this, then you will be unhappy, waiting for your wonderful "tomorrow." But life is one endless "today", right?

You are unwell

Yes, exercise, proper nutrition, and healthy sleep directly affect your happiness. Emotions depend on many physical factors. The mind-body connection is so strong that sometimes a couple of exercises, a walk in the fresh air, and an extra hour of sleep can improve your mood tremendously.

You are a perfectionist

There are three types of perfectionism: self-perfectionism - when you expect yourself to be perfect, social perfectionism - when you feel like others expect you to be perfect, and perfectionism toward others - when you expect others to be perfect. All three types make you unhappy. Let's just accept the fact that perfection is unattainable - and to be honest, it's also boring - and life will become much easier.

You are afraid of failure

Some people are so afraid of making a mistake that they choose to do nothing. Imagine doing this when you first learned to walk. You would still be crawling. Unfortunately, as we grow up, we sometimes lose courage and are afraid to try new things. If you accept this way of thinking, your life will never be complete - accordingly, you will not see happiness as your ears.

You cling to the familiar

Growth takes place outside of our comfort zone. If you do not dare to go beyond the usual, you will never know the joy of conquering fears and gaining wings. One day the bird has to jump to learn how to fly. You cannot stay in the nest and be happy watching others fly.

You owe someone

Debt triggers stress, relationship breakdown, and financial hardship. Develop a plan for how you will settle accounts with creditors, and you will immediately feel much calmer.

You crave for an assessment

If you expect others to appreciate you, you will always be unhappy. No one, except yourself, has the right to determine your significance and value.

You neglect close relationships

Do you know what people regret on their deathbed? No, not at all about the fact that they made little money and did not spend enough time in the office. Most people think of a relationship that was destroyed in the pursuit of unnecessary things. Don't neglect family and friends. After all, love is still the greatest value in the world.

You procrastinate endlessly

Procrastination is an endless spiral of frustration. You put things off until later, and the more you do this, the heavier your load. It's like trying to run a marathon and collect rocks along the way. In the end, the weight becomes simply unbearable.

You must finish what you started and throw these stones away in order to remain light and ready to maneuver, without dragging 20 cases from yesterday into tomorrow.

You are not learning

Learning new things brings the joy of discovery. Find a hobby, look for a new interest in life. While studying, you will learn the world anew - which means that you remain young, able to be surprised and happy.

You have unfulfilled dreams

The ghosts of unfulfilled desires may haunt us. Fortunately, we can always breathe life into our attitude if we can find the courage to move for new opportunities.

Are you bored

Many people's lives are unchanged, and this can lead to boredom. We have the latest achievements in science and technology, the world around is simple and relatively safe, and there is no place for adventure. Routine sucks. But there are many ways to bring variety to life. Set a goal for yourself to do what knocks you out of your usual rut and even scares you - believe me, there are so many things that can wake you up, shake you up, surprise and charm you.

You are too busy

You are busy all the time, so you don't have time to feel alive. What kind of happiness can we talk about here? Review your schedule. You will surely find many things there that take your time, but give nothing in return.

You sleep little

People who suffer from insomnia are 10 times more likely to become depressed than those who sleep well. Get enough sleep - and you will be happy.

You are not spending enough time with yourself

Sometimes you need to give your ears a break from the noise of life and focus on your inner monologue. Spending time alone with yourself is natural and normal. It doesn't matter if it's a cup of coffee on a park bench or a weeklong mountain climbing trip. Your psyche will be very grateful to you for such moments of solitude.

You have no purpose

A goalless life is an endless source of frustration. Rather than just letting things happen to you, create your future by setting goals and achieving them. Seeing that a goal has been successfully achieved is one of the greatest joys in life.

You are addicted

It is easier to depend on others, but independence is a trait of an adult. Those who cling to others and do not plan to be free are doomed to struggle with low self-esteem. It is impossible to fly on your own wings if you are burdened with the need to constantly "drag" someone else with you.

You think you don't deserve to be happy

Some people have a distorted belief that they don't deserve to be happy. They are gnawed at by guilt for past actions, or they simply feel that they are not worthy of such an emotion. But happiness is an experience that everyone should experience. Cross out the “not” in your “I don't deserve” and see what changes.

You are always a little bit missing

To feel the fullness of life, you always lack something else. And further. And also this - a little bit, just a little. If you are constantly one step away from satisfaction, your chances of happiness are significantly reduced. It will never end, the greed monster will gnaw you from the inside. You will lie to yourself all the time that you are about to find the last thing that will make you happy. In fact, this pit has no bottom. Try to feel the joy of every moment, and you will feel an unprecedented rise.

You ignore opportunities

When opportunity knocks on the door, many of us simply turn up the volume on the TV and make ourselves comfortable on the couch. Indeed, this opportunity looks like work or pushes you out of your comfort zone, and you don't need it. It's easier to sit out, right? But if this behavior becomes a habit, one day you will wake up deeply disappointed when you realize that you have missed every chance. It's hard to be happy if you don't let the good things happen in your life.

You are complacent

Complacency gives the illusion of calmness. Everything is going well, life does not beat you, you are as beautiful as God - what else is needed? In fact, you just go with the current, and one day it can carry you to a very unfriendly shore. Fight, overcome yourself, do not allow yourself to ossify in a passive existence.

You hate your job

Whatever one may say, at work you spend most of your life. It's hard to keep a happy smile if you hate this place and the people you meet there every day with every fiber of your soul. Still, work should bring joy and satisfaction, not just the ability to pay the bills.

You are chasing unnecessary things

Sometimes we forget what is really important to us. Just think - do you really need this new car if it requires working three jobs and sacrificing time that you could spend with your family?

You have no spiritual life

Modern research shows the relationship between spirituality and happiness. This is due to the fact that meditation or prayer, as well as communication with positively minded like-minded people, soothe, help to relax and tune in to change for the better.

You have no real friends

You may be surrounded by hundreds of friends and acquaintances, but if among them there is not a single close friend who would be with you even in the strongest storm, then you will be unhappy. Life is about constantly interacting with people, and if you are not sure if your bonds are strong, you may want to look for friends. You will feel more confident knowing that you always have support.

Are you afraid of yourself

It is strange, but many are afraid of themselves and do not trust their instincts. But if you don't even trust yourself, then who can you trust at all? Learn to believe in your decisions and not doubt your own path in life. This is what is called "harmony".

You are too worried about what others think

As soon as you accept the fact that it is impossible to please everyone, life immediately sparkles with bright colors. Trying to please everyone and everyone will one day drive you crazy. There is no point in living constantly trying to fit in with someone.

You don't relax

After all, life is a game, and we all need a time out from time to time. If you don't allow yourself to rest, stress and frustration will accompany you all the time. Learn to relax and recuperate, and then your mental and physical health will improve markedly.

You take no risk

Many people do not make the most of their life opportunities. If you feel that you are capable of more, take risks, challenge fate. You can feel the delight of the discoverer, while your friends will continue to wallow lazily in the swamp of everyday life. Overcoming boundaries makes life so much more attractive.

You are impatient

Oh, how hard it is to be patient, how hard it is to wait, but sometimes that's all you can do. Sometimes circumstances force us to slow down and wait, you just need to come to terms with it. In the end, you can choose to calm down and take your time with the decision.