How To Survive The Departure Of A Mistress: A Letter From A Cheating Husband

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

How to survive the departure of a mistress: a letter from a cheating husband. Through social media and email, I receive daily reviews of my books and my consultations. Some of the letters turn out to be so interesting that (of course, with the consent of their authors) they should be read by very many men and women. The letter from the cheating man, whom I renamed Vladimir, is from this series. Get to know him and you won't regret it! It will definitely make you better comprehend life, and your own behavior, especially in the family.

Note: The text has been edited to soften the curse words and make it a little more logical. All characters' names have been changed for confidentiality purposes. Removed all data on the age of people and their city of residence.

LETTER

Hello Andrey. My name is Vladimir! I have not been to your consultation, we do not know each other personally. But my mistress, Natalya, came to see you. Went secretly from me at the beginning of the summer. You made her the layout of our relationship and told her that nothing would shine for her. Despite the fact that we have been together for more than four years, and we are ideal in sex, I still cannot leave my wife and two small children. No matter how they force me to do this, I will not go for a divorce and will never become Natalia's legal husband.

I am still angry as a dog about what happened, but you definitely concluded that it is useless to wait for any decision from me. Because I really can't do it. Because if I could, I would have done it a long time ago. But I couldn't do it. Therefore, the decision about our relationship for me will have to be made only by my women themselves. You can't expect this from me. And all this is, in fact, true!

I am writing this, having slightly drunk whiskey and myself in shock. I am an adult rich man who has fucked a lot of women, and then I found myself in a dead end! For many years now I can neither choose one of my wife and mistress, nor abandon one of them, nor continue my life further, when they both cry and then hysteria. What still pisses me off that I drove myself into this hell only myself, without the help of outsiders. The wife has known for two whole years that her husband is sleeping with the other, the mistress knows that the wife knows about her, and I myself - neither here nor there. I don't care about myself. Time passes, but no one is doing anything, everyone is in a hurry.

I read it on your website:

When a man has a wife, he has a family.

When a man has a mistress, life has him.

Really said! Only instead of "has", I would have written "fucks"! And not just yet, but to all places at once! As it is, so it should be written, let people be smarter! Because, being drawn into an affair with a mistress, who by her qualities is quite worthy of becoming a wife, having fallen in love with her, in the end, I really fucked myself! He made himself hell with a brazier and lied in front of everyone for two hundred percent. Moreover, I almost lost my business.

I understood everything with my mind: I had no choice but to part with Natalia. I knew it like two or two, but I pulled it to the last, I could not help myself. Instead of honestly saying that we won't have anything, every year he said that I was about to leave my wife, only the children would grow up … If only to retain the right to be her master, take her with me on business trips and fuck her when I'm comfortable. But she's already thirty-three, she could not sit in girls until forty! And she loved me, I really understood and understand that. Therefore, you correctly told her that not only I would not abandon her, but she herself would not abandon me, unless she found an alternative for herself - another, unmarried option. A man who will not warm her head, but will quickly marry. Moreover, she will be able to find such a fellow only by doing this on purpose, in a different way - in no way. Because while she has violent sex and gifts with me, she has no reason to take someone else's attention. Everything is just like that. It couldn't be better.

She says that after talking with you, she cried and suffered. But I thought about my future and accepted your assessment of my situation. I started looking. Who seeks will always find. Especially when, at my expense, the gym and beauty salons, stylishly dressed, learned to fuck like a goddess. I found myself poorer, but younger and not married. Only after hearing "love" from him, she told me that it was time to leave and moved out of the pontovo apartment that I rented to her, to the unknown address of her new pepper.

But I could not lose her at once, I could not do it, because before death you will not breathe! I howled like a wolf and ran after her around the city for a whole week. I tried to locate her phone, but she changed the number and did not go online. I drank from grief for another week and read your site. I reread it all. Recognized myself, recognized her. I realized that we are not special, like us - a dime a dozen. Then I lay in bed for a week, and my wife looked after me and patiently listened as I confessed my love to Natasha, who had abandoned me. Thank her for that! What did she endure during this time ?! I certainly would not have been able to hear this from her, I would have killed right away! And all this month, my team was waiting for the rag-boss to come to his senses! During this time, two contracts for big millions were pissed away. We lost a long-term customer, everything was paralyzed. Lost face in front of people.

But all for the best! Through pain, I realized this. I realized this pain is bullshit compared to losing my two kids in a divorce. Or we would give birth with Natasha, as she asked, and she would leave me with my child, without waiting for my divorce. Or my children would grow up and say that I am an asshole because my mother died from the fact that I left her. And my wife is like that, really without me will wither away from melancholy.

How to survive the departure, it still hurts me, but I am already being treated. I'm a shitty family man, but now I still try to give my children and my wife the time that I stole from them for almost five years. Children are crazy about happiness when dad, who always lied to them that he works a lot, suddenly began to walk with them and go to the cinema. The wife doesn’t seem to believe that it’s over. She must be in great pain. But now I am treating her with our communication.

The day before yesterday Natalya called me herself and said "thank you" for everything. She said that they applied to the registry office and we will never see each other again. We both cried. I still cry. But you also have it written correctly:

Better to let adults cry than their children cry!

All this pain and parting is for the best. Stop living furtively! Stop deceiving everyone. Stop deceiving yourself that you dream of a new family and children, but in reality you just want to fuck and are afraid of losing your property, the money invested in her silicone. It is necessary to do business, no one will do it without me. You need to take care of the children, they grow up, and dad runs on the sly on dates, like a high school student, secretly from their parents. One must become an adult. Apparently, you become an adult only by learning how to make difficult, but correct decisions. I don't want to be an adult anyway, I want to love, run, fuck and lie like a young fool. I don’t want to even now! I want to be young and live in highs. But all the same, even though I can't, I will become an adult! Even if I have to go through all this to the end.

Today my wife and children are returning from the dacha from their mother. We went on this Saturday. I didn’t go, because after Natalya’s call I was lying in bed. Taking advantage of his loneliness, he deleted all the correspondence with Natalia, all our photos. To avoid pain, he threw out all her small gifts: key chains, belts, ties, pens, etc. I finish reading your website, I finish drinking whiskey, I finish crying, I say goodbye to the five-year double life forever. Even - triple and quadruple and fivefold. Because, I always managed to cheat on Natalia. Even though he loved her. Although I still love my wife. Natalya called it male invincibility, she read it somewhere on the Internet.

In short, I lived completely confused. Tomorrow everyone will see the usual Vladimir Nikolaevich, whose word is law. Life is not limited to violent sex with a mistress, no matter how clever and beautiful she is, life is wider. It's time to get out of this deeply fucked rut and live on as before, without lies and love addiction. Without jealousy for a woman who is still not yours, and you are not hers. So, let Natalia live on without me, and my children and my wife - with me. Letting her go with heartache, but still in peace! Good luck with her marriage, healthy children and a husband who will not cheat like me. Although, I think that after the experience with me, she will keep her husband's balls in her fist. And this will be useful not only for her, but also for himself. This is my wife Anna, she herself dismissed me with her kindness and chronic lack of weariness. Anyway. You know all this without me, you have described it on your website.

If you want, use my letter, just remove the mats and change the names. Let other people know how painful it is to become entangled in a relationship with two women, where each is worth living with her a lifetime, until death. Let others not pass my pain. Let them say goodbye to their mistresses in time, let them live their own, and not someone else's life. Or better, they don't get turned on at all. In fact, masturbation is cheaper and more beneficial for the family and health than love and divorce, which you don't want anyway.

Thank you. For helping Natalia and in fact helping me. Not even me, but my children. Would be there, would have poured you whiskey and drank to the men. So that we are smarter and know how to look beyond our own penis. Help people like me and those women who suffer next to us. Well, for the men and for those who suffer from their love and their indecision! Good luck with your work! And it's time for me to take on mine.

Commentary from psychologist Andrey Zberovsky. Despite a certain rudeness, I consider this letter in its own way a masterpiece of male creativity. Through the pain of his loss, a completely intelligent and, apparently, quite successful man, was able to very accurately describe what millions of men all over the earth actually experience, regardless of age, citizenship, education and condition. This image will clearly be recognizable for many men and women. It can even be called typical for a situation with many years of "left" love relationships, which in my work as a family psychologist I define as "secret" or "parallel marriage." And may my readers get the most out of reading it.

I consider it necessary to say "Thank you" to this man, to wish him resilience in adapting after a very stressful situation! I also consider it necessary to answer this letter, to give a detailed answer to it.