2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
I walk out of the store and notice the joy.
I am glad that I have already learned to notice myself and my interests and defend them.
It used to be different …
Before, I could notice that my soul was somehow hard …
But why it was so hard for me to understand right away …
So. The case in the store was like this.
This is a small shop.
I went there to buy fish.
The salesperson left the department, and I stand and wait for her to come back and I can buy fish.
She's coming back. And before I have time to turn to her, a man enters and swiftly addresses her in his own way: "Star, weigh me a dried fish."
I feel annoyed that the man is ignoring the fact that I am standing right there in the store. And he is going to make a purchase, ignoring other people, namely me.
I also address the seller with the words: “I would also like you to serve me. I approached earlier."
The seller says: "Yes, please, what do you want?"
I answer: "I have pollock, please."
She says: "Only small pollock."
I pause. It is important for me to understand whether I need a small pollock and if so, how much.
During this pause, the man says: “Well, I'm going from work here, tired. While you are thinking, I would have bought it already."
Earlier, these words could hurt me. Well, like, ah-yay, I detain a man, he is tired, and here I am bothering him to buy fish. How not ashamed …”And I would feel ashamed and guilty that I prevent a tired person from buying a fish.
What would I do before?
I would say something like "of course, of course, you are tired, buy what you need, I will wait."
And now…
I notice that the man does not look so tired and, in fact, it is he who prevents me from making a purchase, distracting me with his remarks, trying to make me feel guilty or ashamed.
And I tell him so confidently and calmly: “So what? I am a customer just like you."
Everything.
I buy fish and leave the store pleased with myself.
Why am I happy with myself?
Because it was not easy for me to walk this path - from falling into guilt and shame to being calm and confident and noticing my interests. And learned to defend them.
On this path, there were many times just those situations when, after what happened, I noticed my painful emotional state. And in him there was a lot of anger at himself that he did not defend himself.
And how glad I am now that I have learned to use this anger, directing not at myself, but at the situation and circumstances. And this energy of anger gives me the opportunity to do things to change this situation and circumstances for the better for me.
Are you familiar with such situations and experiences?
If you find it difficult to defend yourself, if it is difficult for you to use your anger for your own good, if you are used to being dissatisfied with yourself and you don’t like it, then come to me for consultations and I will be happy to help you go the same path that I went through …
And come to the point where you don't have to destroy your body by blaming yourself.
Because anger directed at ourselves destroys our health.
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