2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Emotions are mental processes in which a person experiences his attitude to certain phenomena of the surrounding reality. Emotions also reflect various states of the human body, his attitude to his own behavior and to his activities.
How does a man who is unable to control his emotions behave? He has insufficiently developed emotional intelligence, when making serious decisions, such people are not inclined to analyze the situation, cannot hesitate for a long time, are not able to compromise, in a dispute or conflict situation they do not put themselves in the place of another person, and distort reality for themselves. Such people live in a world of illusions, fantasies and childish naivety. In their view, they are the most important person, better and more worthy than other people. It is believed that in their absence the world would have ceased to exist long ago. Being sure that it is they who set this planet in motion, then of course everyone owes them for it.
Inside view
Nobody loves me, there are too many people around, this is so unbearable. I have to be significant and no one else. I am ready to give, but on condition that I receive unconditional love, exceptional support for it, even if my beginnings and ideas are doomed to failure, and there have already been mistakes and failures. I'm not ready for a sincere relationship. I do not trust anyone, there are too many enemies around, everyone wants to use me, humiliate, devalue, destroy me. The mistakes I made, the wrong decisions, the actions I have done that have negative consequences, this is the fault of other people and circumstances.
What people around them see
A separate topic is the relationship of such a person with his family. As a rule, in the families of such people, there is no concept of love, respect, sincerity, care and attention to each other are not manifested. They do not know how to put themselves in the place of another, to empathize, to sincerely help.
Relationships with work colleagues are built on conflicts and misunderstandings. There are frequent disputes with the management and disagreement with decisions taken from above. Having friends usually comes down to common interests, mainly at work. Such people are characterized by irascibility, aggressive behavior, anger. They often run from problems, unresolved situations and people who are caught in unpleasant or difficult life circumstances. As a rule, they often end relationships with their parents, abandon families in which they claimed autocracy, and not partnerships, leave women if they do not meet their needs in understanding, support and love, but then they often regret their actions.
Causes of the conflict
Each of us comes into the world ready to open up to new things. Already in the womb, we get the first emotional experience.
The main emotional experience of a child is formed through interaction with parents. The way parents react to the child, to his behavior, temperament and the future picture of ideas about the world will be laid. And here the most important thing is with what feelings the parents communicate with the child, what emotional response he receives from them.
According to Eric Berne's concept of transactional analysis, each person has three personality states - Parent Child and Adult. At a certain point in time, we are in one of these ego states. Transactional analysis helps to distinguish between these ego states and use them effectively in communication. It is in stressful situations or recalling the traumatic experience of the past that any of us can stay in one of these ego states, falling out of the reality of what is happening. Internal conflict occurs precisely when one of the ego states is in confrontation with the other, or prevails over the other two.
How psychotherapy works
A request for consultation will sound like this - "I can not make a final decision, I am confused in life, I have lost my bearings." Thanks to the transactional analysis model, you can learn to better understand yourself, build harmonious and effective relationships with people around you in your personal and professional spheres. Accept the presence of this conflict, realize your feelings, desires and needs. Find ways to release negative emotions, detoxify them. Transform energy in a positive direction, towards creation, not destruction. Learn to accept the versatility of other people's views. Focus on yourself and your problem, learning self-reflection. Develop critical thinking, responsibility for your actions.
Sokolova Alexandra (c)
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