2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Why does a relationship that was initially turbulent and emotionally intense fade over time? Most often, explaining this, people, without delving into their own experiences, say that they are simply tired or that they have ceased to feel something in relation to their partner or partner. They are quite satisfied with such explanations, but the difficulty is that over and over again a similar situation, in the development of relations, is repeated with them.
In my opinion, one of the reasons for this state of affairs, and the explanation, is fear. Moreover, both men and women experience it (especially if people already have a negative experience of relationships), the speech is that a person begins to understand that if the relationship develops, then he will have to change his life principles and habits. In other words, the whole adjusted life will have to be changed. And you also have to change your level of responsibility and plans for the future. Such adjustments in relation to the familiar (and so familiar) outlook on life is a very difficult process for some people. And most importantly, it is impossible to accurately predict or predict the result. And everything that a person does not know scares him. Of course, everyone has a different strength of this fear and someone can pass it, while the other is not able to do it. To admit, in such fear, a partner or partner is considered unworthy, people say in such cases that this can be perceived as distrust of someone who is nearby. A person, when something frightens him, is inclined to feel sorry for himself and to justify his behavior, such thoughts are unpleasant to him. Therefore, for someone the best way out is to end the relationship. The reason may be, in such cases, completely insignificant.
One more point. A healthy and harmonious relationship is always based on the “I give” principle. That is, a person first of all strives not to receive something from a partner or a partner, namely to give. Often people, on the contrary, perceive relationships from the point of view of only obtaining satisfaction of their needs. It doesn't matter what kind, whether it's sex, gifts, attention, or something else. Moreover, this model of relations is supported by the morality of society. But, as you know, morality is a changeable thing. If in the Middle Ages it was believed that a beautiful woman was a witch, she was burned, morality changed, and the attitude towards women, too. In cases where a relationship is built on expectations, first of all, of the benefits from a partner or a partner, then a person has a feeling that they owe him, as it were implied by default. But here's the trick, often a human want has no boundaries, then a moment comes when a person begins to feel that he is not being given something. Accordingly, this is unpleasant for him, but he only blames the partner, because he should have, there is resentment and disappointment. Against this background, attempts to manipulate others are not uncommon, forcing him to "run" after his partner (s) in order to make amends. But not everyone agrees to this. As a result, the breakup of relations. It happens in some cases that someone gets tired of giving all the time and not seeing "justice" he leaves the relationship. Preferring to leave his life unchanged.
It happens that both of the above options take place at the same time. People often do not even dare to admit to themselves the true reasons for the breakup, and this unawareness of the problem continues to govern their behavior. In my opinion, a mature person, be it a man or a woman, needs to define goals for himself that will be a priority for him in the process of building relationships. At the same time, it is good to remember that this process, by and large, lasts all the time of the relationship.
Live with joy! Anton Chernykh.
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