8 Myths About Narcissism

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

It is surprising that people associate narcissism with different, sometimes even opposite, characteristics. Some narcissists have been described as charming, confident people who are liked by others and tend to be in the spotlight. Other narcissists, by contrast, have been described as arrogant, exploitative, and rather aggressive in general. In keeping with such opposing descriptions, researchers have long recognized that narcissists can have very different characteristics, such confusion makes the topic of narcissism in society more attractive, because it becomes much easier to speculate with it. So, let's look at the main myths about narcissism.

Myth 1. "All around" daffodils"

In common parlance, we call people with high self-esteem narcissists, but true narcissistic disorder is a rare disorder that affects about 1 in 100 people, and all people can be placed on a continuum showing the extent to which a person has narcissistic tendencies.

Myth 2. "Narcissists" are growing from year to year"

Most psychologists say this is not the case. True pathological narcissism has always been rare and remains so: it affects about 1 percent of the population, and this prevalence has not changed since clinicians began to measure it. Most (but not all) alleged "narcissists" today are innocent victims of label abuse. They are normal people with healthy egos who can love selfies and talk about their accomplishments, even if they are not always true.

Myth 3. "Narcissism is selfishness"

Many narcissists have a sense of grandeur and can really feel like they are in the top 0.1%. But it is a mistake to think that all narcissists will be like that. Not all narcissists care about appearance, fame, or money; some narcissists may devote their lives to others. They may even agree with statements such as "I am the most helpful person I know" or "I will be known for my good deeds." Dr. Craig Malkin, an expert on narcissism, says: "Everyone has met grand altruistic martyrs, sacrificing themselves to the point where you cannot stand in a room with them."

Myth 4. "All narcissists are opinionated and narcissistic."

The narcissist lives in a world of two poles - worthlessness and grandeur. The feeling of grandiosity is often described as a reactionary superstructure over the feeling of insignificance, in which case it is difficult to talk about self-confidence, or narcissism. Most narcissists respond poorly to even mild criticism and need constant encouragement. Narcissists are more likely to feel exceptional, even if they describe themselves as typical, then they are "the most typical." These thoughts of their exclusivity soothes them because they otherwise struggle with an unstable sense of self.

Myth 5. "It is good to be a narcissist, because they are happy"

Seth Rosenthal, a Yale University scholar who wrote his Ph. D. on narcissism, says: “They have a constant need to be validated by the world around them for their greatness. When reality catches up with them, they may react with depression."

Myth 6. "Narcissists don't see themselves"

A 2011 study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology reported that narcissists tended to understand their identity: they called themselves arrogant and knew that others saw them less positively than they saw in themselves.

Myth 7. "Narcissists are incapable of empathy"

The empathy aspect of narcissistic personality disorder can be confusing to those who have not been trained to diagnose it. A complete lack of empathy identifies a psychopathic personality, but people with high narcissism show outbursts of compassion.“Higher-level narcissists have the ability and capacity to empathize,” says Hooprich, but ultimately their own needs come first. "Empathy is often superficial and short-lived."

Myth 8. "Narcissists are made because of bad parenting"

Childhood experiences can play an important role, but most experts agree that high levels of narcissistic traits arise from the combined influences of nature and nurture, which likely begin in the genes. “There are personality traits that we come into the world with,” says Kali Tresniewski, a social development psychologist at the University of California, Davis.

One study of twins showed that narcissism was a hereditary trait. It can also show up at an early age: Another study found that dramatic, aggressive, attention-grabbing preschoolers were more likely to be narcissistic adults.

Parenting styles, influences from other relationships, and social and cultural environments can contribute to (or inhibit) the development of narcissism. Brummelman says that when mothers and fathers are warm and affectionate, spend time with their children and show interest in their activities, “children gradually learn the belief that they are worthy people - and this does not spill over into narcissism.” And vice versa - staging children on a pedestal - really contributes to the emergence of narcissistic traits To avoid favoring malignant narcissistic traits, parents are better off saying, "You did a good job," rather than - "You deserve to win" or "Why are you not as good as Vera from 5-B? ".

Based on articles:

- Rebecca Webber Meet the Real Narcissists.

- Ingo Zettler "Do Different Types of Narcissists Exist?"