2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Enough is the magic word.
Enough is freedom from addictions, fears, anxieties, obsessions, envy, useless comparison of oneself with others, perfectionism and discomfort.
Enough - this is acceptance of the present moment, consent to live with what you have now.
Enough - this is your calmness and balance between want, can and should.
And at the same time “ enough »Does not mean your abandonment of goals and plans, does not become an obstacle on your way. On the contrary, “enough” today gives you the opportunity to focus and think about who you want to be, what you want to get and how you will do it tomorrow.
When I speak " enough", I mean all spheres of your being: feelings, desires, knowledge, skills, entertainment, work, money, care, loved ones, friends …
When I speak " enough", I mean enough today, now, in these conditions. Tomorrow or elsewhere, there may be another enough. But it will be tomorrow. And tomorrow you will direct all your strength and energy to achieve a new "enough". Well, if not tomorrow, then the day after tomorrow.
What happens when you are in short supply? You only focus on him. You depend on him. Your worldview and worldview are narrowed to the limits of lack. You cannot think of anything else. And the longer you do not get what you want, the stronger your deprivation, the more damaged you feel, the more anxiety. It cuts off access to fresh ideas and forces you to seek protection.
And the sooner you receive less, the more terrible the tragedy of your existence.
I'm going to tell you a scary story. But it is she who perfectly illustrates where the feeling that you are always missing something comes from.
Remember the maniac Chikatilo? For ten years, he ruined dozens of lives of children and women. When he was caught and examined, he was declared sane. Although many experts did not think so. An additional examination was carried out at the Moscow Institute of Practical Psychology. Maniac managed to slow down until the age of one year. The result is the same: we are sane. And only a conversation with my mother put everything in its place.
It was an unwanted child for her. Most likely, due to her illiteracy, she saw her pregnancy too late and gave birth. For six months she did not take the baby in her arms. Bottle-fed in the crib, turning away from him. Over time, she got used to the idea that she had a son, her feelings thawed, but it was too late: the personality of the maniac was formed.
In his victims, women, Chikatilo cut off the upper eyelid and bit off the nipples. In each of them he saw his mother and seemed to say: “Turn your eyes on me. Hold me to your chest. The lack of love was so great, so irreplaceable that he could no longer leave them alive: he wanted these women to belong only to him.
And love is never in abundance. And the more you give it, especially to a very small one man, the more secure he feels, the greater the likelihood that he will learn early to understand what it means “ enough . And he will not have to make up for love with its substitutes: food, sweets, drugs, alcohol, things, lovers, hundreds of acquaintances, money, jewelry, apartments …
You have already grown up and you can quite determine if everything is enough for you. But you have a great opportunity to give love to your child, so that he does not stumble through life in search of it and does not freeze in his psychological development at the level of six months.
Enough is not self-restraint. This is the understanding that now you can live with this set of necessary and desirable things
Enough is the preservation of your inner comfort and release from the "must, must, so must" press
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