2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Dialogue is when I throw the ball to you, and you throw it back to me. That being said, we both know that this is a ball, not a jar of jam or a rotten tomato. We know, we voice it: why we throw it and why exactly to each other and what kind of answer we expect. We give ourselves time to think about our partner's throw so that with the next throw we can inform him about our reaction to him. We give our partner time to reflect on what they have received and respond to the shot. This is a very leisurely game.
What happens in life.
- Without realizing whether the partner wants to play the ball, the person throws it to him. The partner is not ready and does not know at all.
- Not understanding what I have in my hands, I throw him rotten tomatoes and jars of jam (resentment against people in the past, my projections, both positive and negative). - I don’t throw anything at all, expecting that my partner will start first (I believe that I’m not interesting, I do everything to remain invisible, then I’m convinced that yes, I’m not interesting, although the truth is I was very good at disguising myself in the roadside bushes).
- My partner throws a ball to me, but my projections shout to me "this is a rotten tomato!" and I brutally beat him back, hitting my partner in the most sore spot.
- My partner is throwing me a rotten tomato, I believe that this is a jar of jam, having gotten dirty, I am terribly disappointed and offended by my partner (this is about unjustified expectations and the inability to carefully consider what they are throwing at me).
- I throw, throw, throw, not expecting an answer, in fact, forgetting that they somehow react to my throw every time … I threw a partner. The partner got scared from such an attack and fled. When I am asked to take my time and wait for the same return throw, I take offense, taking this request as rejection.
- They throw at me, throw, throw … and I am silent. Then I am offended that my silence was taken as a sign of consent. I feel like a victim of an attack "he should have understood that this does not suit me!" Sorry, the other person does not know how to read your thoughts and your receptors are not on his body.
- Every time they throw something at me, I see something of my own there, without asking my partner what it actually was and what he wanted. I thought it up myself - I was offended myself, I myself was glad.
- We throw our eyes closed, wherever it is, there it is.
- I think I'm throwing the ball, but in fact I don't even look at it, I throw whatever is horrible as a result. - I think I'm throwing, but in fact, the throw only happens in my head.
- I don’t tell my partner that I’m in pain (and I don’t know at all that it hurts me and most importantly why), but, on the contrary, in a defensive rage, I start attacking him. The partner did not understand anything. Didn't ask what it was. Come up with a reason and react accordingly. ("Did you go to the store?" - "You always find fault with me!"
- "You do not love me!" (the projection “I don’t love myself, I’m always dissatisfied with myself, when I hear dissatisfaction, I perceive it as rejection”). Isn't it easier to just learn the rules of the game and learn how to serve and hit correctly? Share with your friends! This is important to know!
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