2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Many are afraid of their conflicting feelings towards loved ones.
Just now there was love, tenderness spilled over the body, and in the next moment there is no more strength: everything in a person's behavior infuriates, it seems, you hate with all your heart. The run-up from one extreme to another reaches several minutes: it becomes incomprehensible if this is a loved one, why the force of irritation, hatred, pain, fatigue is so great. Why to strangers, in such situations, we react more calmly, while loved ones get the full program.
Common situation?
Me, very much.
Once, too, I was very scared of this emotional swing, sometimes falling into a feeling of my own badness.
What kind of mother am I if I shout at children.
What a daughter, if I can't stand long-term communication with my parents.
What a wife, if from time to time there are thoughts of parting.
Relief came when I figured out the nature of experiences.
Feelings are always driven by the relationship, and emotions are always driven by the situation.
We get angry, offended, scared next to loved ones and these emotions are due to a specific situation. Since we objectively spend more time with loved ones, situations are very different, the range of emotions is the widest.
Emotions are generated by the situation and they signal to us that something is happening that we cannot stand. They are “here and now”, changeable, short-lived, often, very superficial. It is worth talking about them, tying them to the situation, and not to the person. Talking about what you are experiencing right now, emphasizing that this does not at all cancel, does not diminish our relationship to a person.
Yes, you can be angry and love at the same time.
Do not understand, but do not devalue the opinion of another.
Unlike emotions, feelings are stable. They are directed, develop in time, belong to relationships and are not destroyed “here and now”. We can experience different emotions, but this does not mean that we devalue all the good that still remains in a loved one, in our joint history with him.
It is a great myth that in close relationships there is always an idyll and love, everything is easy and smooth.
It just so happened that relatives and friends "get" the most emotions. Different. Nobody can be kind, accepting, patient non stop. Each has its own dark sides, limits of possibilities and impossibilities. To accumulate emotions, endure, restrain, means gradually destroy the relationship, and therefore the feelings that belong to them.
There is no good relationship where at least one of them is bad.
Recommended:
The Essence Of Psychotherapy Is Short And Succinct - Competent Work With Emotions And Feelings
In this article I will share my vision of how, in a systematic approach, you can quickly and efficiently work with the emotional sphere of a person. I have already written an article about what feelings are, what they are for, what you need to understand in order to learn how to manage your emotional sphere.
Cheat Sheet On Feelings And Emotions For Non-psychologists
If you are well versed in your own emotions, you can easily say what you feel, name these experiences, then you already know everything that is written here. And this is written for another category of people. For those who don't know exactly what they feel.
“I Don’t Care About Your Feelings. And I Lived For Many Years Without Any Feelings. Why Should I Change Now ?! " Case From Practice
Oksana, a young unmarried woman of 30 years old, turned for psychotherapy due to a general feeling of emptiness, the loss of any meaning and a vacuum in values. According to her, she was "completely confused", did not know "what she wants in life and from life.
Manifestation Of Feelings And Emotions - A Difficult Science Or A Must-have Of The Modern World?
Manifestation of feelings and emotions - a difficult science or a must-have of the modern world? I notice from my clients that rarely does anyone come to therapy when they have a question about how to earn money for food or for the treatment of some serious illness.
About Emotions And Feelings. How Important It Is To Live And Feel
Many of us have not been taught to feel. And this is an important part of us, which signals states and reactions to events and our environment. Unfortunately, we are trained to do and not to feel. Otherwise, how can we control us? No way.
