Cheat Sheet On Feelings And Emotions For Non-psychologists

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

If you are well versed in your own emotions, you can easily say what you feel, name these experiences, then you already know everything that is written here. And this is written for another category of people. For those who don't know exactly what they feel. More precisely, he does not know how to name his emotions, to distinguish them, and who, as a result, is afraid of his own and others' feelings. Poorly copes with their course, prefers to run, fence off, rationalize.

To begin with, please answer the question: what are you feeling now? Write down your answer.

Now, perhaps, let's start to understand.

In response to a similar question, people usually name different conditions that they can define. It can be

Feel something that happens in the human body. For example, I'm tense. Or I feel my hands are shaking. I feel a lump in my chest. My knees buckle. I'm all over the place. Dry mouth. Cheeks are burning. The hard edge of the table rests on the hand.

emotions - a quick subjective integral assessment of what is now and the forecast for the future.

For example, colleagues come into the office and tell you that unexpectedly the department was given a big bonus and you need to go urgently to get it. Your inner response - joy, surprise or fear that you were joking - will be the current emotions. Instantly, your brain judged the situation as favorable, and judged what would happen next.

Emotions ensured the survival of our species. They provide not only an instant holistic assessment of the situation and its development, they also provide the necessary energy for action.

Therefore, the strength, intensity of emotions can be different, from the lightest, barely noticeable to saturated, to affect.

The ancestor of man saw the tiger, felt a terrible paralyzing fear, fell like a stone, the tiger (well-fed) passed by. Or, he saw a tiger, remembered the devoured half of the tribe, experienced wild rage, anger, nailed a striped one, became a leader. I'm exaggerating, of course, but this is how emotions work.

In a state of passion, all the body's resources are spent on the struggle for survival. No analysis. A person burns himself for the sake of the most effective action, victory.

Mood informs us about the general condition. For example, you have a great mood in the morning. You are healthy, everything is fine in your family, you are going on vacation, a promotion is awaiting at work … and then some bad man, passing by in his car, forced a puddle and splashed your favorite shoes. Are you upset? Probably yes. Strongly? Hardly. You will experience emotions - for example, anger. But overall, your mood will continue to be great. After all, the general condition and the forecast of further events are encouraging.

The most serious and deepest manifestation of our emotional sphere is feelings … Feelings reflect our assessment of social relationships, relationships between people, attitudes towards meanings created by people. Love for the paintings of Salvador Dali, love for a specific person, love for music … Feeling, as a rule, is long enough in time, and strong in the intensity of the experience. How an extreme degree of feeling can be called passion.

So, the answer to the question "how are you feeling now?" will be instant assessment of what is and the forecast for the future, which we experience as an emotion, feeling, passion, affect, mood.

This experience has a color, tone - it is perceived as pleasant, neutral or unpleasant. And it gives us the vital energy to act. More precisely, emotional manifestations are the simultaneous assessment of events, the readiness to act and the energy to be active.

It may be that a person skips the awareness of his experiences, and immediately gives out something like: I want to hit him, I would have nailed him, I want to drop everything and leave, I want to lie down, fall asleep and never wake up, I don’t feel anything at all, etc. … Such people are very tough and straightforward in their actions, they are, as they say, emotionally deaf, both to their souls and to other people.

Or maybe, on the contrary, a person experiences many, many different emotions, but does not think over their signals rationally, does not realize the available energy for the well-being of himself and his loved ones. It turns out a kind of light in the wind, it seems to be burning, but it does not really warm anyone, why it is burning is not clear, and the risk of fire is huge. And, yes, with this way of dealing with your emotions, the likelihood of emotional burnout is high.

Having dealt a little with the intensity, focus and duration of the manifestations of the emotional sphere, let's move on to the practical part: what emotions and feelings are and what to do with them?

In psychology, there are many theories explaining the various manifestations of human feelings. We will not consider them, let alone discuss the reliability and correctness of the allocation of a specific number of basic emotions, etc. We will follow the principle of information usability and practical value.

1. So, very broadly, you either feel good, or bad, or "nothing". And, the fourth option - do not understand what, or, ambivalent.

To reiterate: in a very rough approximation, you can tell you

1.good

2.bad

3.neither good nor bad

4. In some places it is good, in some places it is bad

2. Now we separate the sensations in the body from the actual emotional experiences.

Yes Yes Yes! They are connected. And they are directly related. In case of severe hunger or pain, irritability is guaranteed. When the body is tired, the pressure has dropped, the person wants to sleep - he becomes calm, sad, etc.

However, is your “good, bad, unappreciated, and in any way” related to the body? Or with some real or imaginary events?

Are you tense because the muscles are stagnant, too long? Or did something happen and you tensed up?

We determine where and how you feel:

- sensations in the body, - emotions and feelings.

3 … We decipher the experience, name it, determine its intensity. In the beginning, while you are learning to name your feelings, you can use the list of emotions. Of course, you can add your own individual experience names to the list of feelings and emotions. You can put them on the list, taking into account the intensity of the experience.

Disgust

Slight disgust, slight contempt, disgust, disgust, dislike, antipathy, disgust, contempt, disgust, hatred

Fear

Shadow of Doubt, Flickering Fear, Doubt, Light Fear, Awe, Fear, Fear, Light Anxiety, Excitement, Anxiety, Strong Anxiety, Strong Fear, FEAR !, Light Horror, Horror, HORROR! HORROR! HORROR !, Paralyzing Horror, Horror, Mind-blowing Horror, Panic

Anger

Slight irritation, displeasure, slight annoyance, discontent, annoyance, irritation, indignation, anger, boiling anger, anger, anger, passion, indignation, anger, rage, fury, ferocity, frenzy, frenzy, white rage

Grief

Light grief, disappointment, grief, grief, grief, depression, sadness, sadness, pity, ruin, pain, regret, grief, sorrow, bitter grief, real grief

Shame

Light shame, embarrassment, inconvenience, embarrassment, shame, humiliation, shame, shame (transcendental shame), guilt *

Astonishment

Confusion, helplessness, powerlessness, confusion, surprise, amazement, shock, shock

Interest

Apathy, boredom, indifference, excitement, cheerfulness, interest, inspiration, inspiration, envy, interest, dedication, curiosity, composure, enthusiasm, energy

Pleasure

Serenity, calmness, gratitude, pacification, affection, contentment, drive, exultation, irony, tenderness, joy, delight, admiration, pride, pride, happiness, euphoria, exaltation, ecstasy, love

There are emotions that are experienced by all people, regardless of their culture, country, upbringing. They are called basic … There are simple, elementary emotions in which it is no longer possible to distinguish the constituent parts. For example, fear. They are called elementary.

Quite often, we experience complex, compound feelings and emotions, for example, resentment (a mixture of upset, disappointment and anger), gloating (anger and satisfaction), * guilt (fear, shame, anger and grief) or complex, subtle experiences, such as light sadness or joy with notes of sadness.

Please look at the answer you wrote down. Now answer the question “how do you feel?” Again using the cheat sheet with a list of emotions.

4. You have identified how you feel. What can you do about it?

- ignore

We understand that this is a very unfortunate choice? You can ignore your feelings when the situation calls for it. But in this way it is better to do it occasionally, and in the short term.

- to emotionalize

Here, the same "light in the wind", which we talked about above.

- express

The difference from the previous point is in awareness and meaningfulness. For example, you don't just express your love for someone, but do it in their language, making their life better, making them happy.

You are not chasing a child who has brought a deuce with an evil grin on his face and a slipper in his hands, but express your feelings: anger, pain, disappointment, fear for his future, care for him and love for him - in words, sincerely and simply … And this has an amazing effect - the child hears you.

- survive (endure)

Sometimes in life we experience feelings that can only be experienced. Over time, they will pass, but this does not happen immediately. And not always. For example, homesickness in exile or when moving to another place of residence. The very existence of such experiences makes us human, real and alive.

- analyze and effectively use

- to live

Immerse yourself in a feeling and actively live it, expressing, experiencing, using, realizing activity in various, even unrelated areas of life. Many creative personalities strive for the state of love, then, to the delight of their viewers and admirers, living it like this - sparklingly, beautifully, creating.

By understanding exactly what we are feeling, we get the opportunity to manage our emotional sphere and hear its messages, think and act more effectively. We are in harmony with our soul, with our heart.