2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Many have lived with a wound in their souls for decades. It hurts, aches, bleeds, reminds of itself through shame and guilt, which passes through all spheres of a person's life, through a feeling of helplessness and defenselessness that rolls over suddenly and unexpectedly. After all, when it bleeds, it means that a person's strength flows into emptiness, and weakness becomes greater.
Someone with hatred recalls how his parents treated him in childhood, someone devotes their whole life to their revenge and persecutes them mentally or with words. And someone is silent, keeping their personal secret about the cruelty experienced, because you cannot tell everyone about humiliation, insults, beatings, about the inhumanity with which the child had to meet. And someone no longer has the strength to talk, the soul is beaten as well as the body, mutilated just like the perception of the world around.
Someone still retains a childish belief that a cold and cruel mother will change, it is worth doing something good for her or achieving something in life. Because the pain from broken childhood fantasies is a hundred times stronger than the pain from the truth - cruel people remain cruel forever, they are not capable of change.
In the trauma of violence, there is a lot about loneliness and betrayal. When a person comes into this world through his parents, he least of all expects that it is they, the parents, who will be the most cruel and rejecting. This bitter disappointment can accompany a person for the rest of his life. The feeling of deception, the fear of being helpless or humiliated again pushes a person to many decisions and choices that further burden life. Namely:
- no one can be trusted
- everyone wishes me bad
- he (she) tells me this on purpose, but he thinks differently
- everyone just laughs at me
- I'm not interesting to anyone
- no one will ever love me
- I don't deserve the best
And many more and many others. All these attitudes and decisions form the coping strategy or the traumatized perception. A person seems to stop living, he is not up to joy and pleasure, his task is simply to survive, to stay alive among cruel and vile people, in whom he sees the reflection of his parents like in a mirror. And life again goes in a circle: deception - betrayal - loneliness, betrayal - deception - loneliness. This is a personal recurring life scenario, in order to rewrite it - it is important to face the truth about yourself, about what happened in the past, with your experiences with abusive parents. To stop running from yourself, from your pain is to take the first step towards a new life, towards healing, towards healing a spiritual wound.
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