Back To School

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

1. The modern school makes rather high demands on children and it is important that the child is ready for these tests. Why is school adaptation important? What is this process?

Adaptation includes two aspects: biological and psychological.

The biological aspect of a child's adaptation to school includes the child's adaptation to new environmental conditions: a new daily routine, school discipline, new sounds, smells and nutrition in the school cafeteria, to new requirements for self-control and behavior in class and during breaks, to the need to wear a school uniform etc.

The psychological aspect of adaptation is the adaptation of the child as a person to new requirements for behavior and self-control, inclusion in a new group of classmates and establishing relationships with the first teacher.

From the listing of the components of adaptation, it becomes obvious that this process includes many factors.

Parents of first graders should now take care of the child's day regimen and take care of a certain time for going to bed and waking up. Of course, now the restructuring of the child's daily routine will affect the daily routine of the whole family, but by the beginning of the school year the child will get used to early awakening and will be active and collected in the classroom.

A new period of life, such as starting school, requires a child to be collected, interested and willing to learn. For example, the main criterion for determining a child's readiness for school and his motivation are the questions: "Do you want to go to school?", "What will you do at school, why go there?" Seven-year-old children openly answer such questions and from their answers it is possible to learn a lot about the child's readiness and even clarify the possibility of some problems and difficulties at the beginning of learning.

Adapting to any new environment takes time. Almost all adults, upon employment, find themselves in a situation where the employer first offers a contract for a probationary period for one and a half to two months, and after that - an employment contract. When applying for a new place of work, an adult also finds himself in a situation of adaptation and during the first weeks in a new place he can decide for himself whether this organization suits him, whether it is worth continuing to work or looking for another place.

The same thing happens to a first grader. Only a child cannot refuse to attend school, this is a "compulsory program", a certain long stage in life. Once in school, the child gradually gets used to the new requirements and rules of life, gets to know classmates and the teacher. For a small child, entering school is a significant change in life and the adaptation period also takes several months. The transformation of a small child into a schoolboy is read.

2. Components of any adaptation process

Let's consider the example of adaptation of a first grader to school:

-physical - getting used to the daily routine, to a decrease in mobility and the need to behave quietly and calmly during lessons, instead of your favorite and comfortable clothes to wear a school uniform, a mandatory attribute appears - a heavy backpack or a bag with textbooks and a bag with removable shoes;

-psychological - a decrease in spontaneous manifestations and the need to strengthen self-control, following the instructions of the teacher, the ability to control voluntary attention and maintain concentration on the educational material during the lesson;

-social - communication and building relationships with new children (classmates) and adults (the first teacher and other school staff), making new friends.

3. Stages of adaptation

The periodization of these stages is almost universal and is applicable to various situations where a person is faced with new long-term living conditions.

- We can talk about good adaptation if within a month - one and a half first graders get used to school. He goes to classes with joy and interest, talks about what he does at school, about classmates and a teacher. He has friends and his behavior outside of school is calm and spontaneous.

- Average adaptation takes up to 6 months. After this period of study, the child goes to school with interest, and the teacher does not notice his difficulties. He also has good relationships with classmates, has friends and does not disturb the parents in the child's behavior.

- You can talk about problems with adaptation if the entire first grade of the child is not motivated to study, he does not like going to school, friends in the class have not appeared. Also, the child may often catch colds or have fears, sleep disturbances and complaints of nausea, diarrhea, frequent headaches or fever in the morning or during the day.

4. When else do parents need to prepare their child for tests within the walls of the school?

It is not easy for both children and their parents to have periods associated with various exams and tests. The first exams are taken by schoolchildren during the transition from primary school to the secondary level, then, testing after the 9th and after the 11th grade.

If the parents are ambitious, then the child can pass qualifying tests when entering specialized classes. In a situation of preparation for exams, various qualifying tests or olympiads, it is important to help your own child. If necessary, it is worth contacting qualified tutors and maintaining an atmosphere of support, acceptance and care at home. For many children today, examinations and assessments are extremely difficult. Parents should take into account that severe stress and negative experiences affect memory and the ability to think logically. In a calm and relaxed state, any person shows higher scores in solving problems on logic, he has higher creativity and scores on intelligence tests. And therefore, if parents know about emotional vulnerability, low stress resistance and the difficulties of their own child in some school subjects, then it is much more effective to find a tutor than to criticize or frighten with terrible consequences after failing an exam, an Olympiad or performing at a competition that did not bring a prize.

5. What mistakes do parents most often make when sending a child to school (in the light of psychological adaptation in different school periods)?

The most common mistake parents make is overestimating their child's performance in school. Of course, I really want my own child to be special and the best: capable, gifted and not faced with difficulties. In fact, each child develops at his own pace, he has his own interests and abilities, and also has certain problem areas. There are no people, and even children, without problems and difficulties! Therefore, it is very important for parents to remain attentive, loving, patient and accepting of the child with his imperfection.

Child psychologists often cite a metaphor for growing up and raising a child by parents: if carrots are constantly pulled by the tops, then they will not grow faster or better, but there are much more chances to damage the vegetable and not get a harvest. Therefore, it is important for parents to remain considerate and patient and not compare their own children with anyone else. In a modern school, it is much more important to preserve the psychological well-being and health of the child, by all means to "make" an excellent student and a medalist out of the child.

Summarizing what was said above and from our own practical experience, the following common mistakes of parents can be distinguished:

- high expectations from their own children;

- the desire to overdevelop the intellectual sphere;

- one-sided development of the child. For example, “my child is an athlete,” “my child is the smartest, and everything else is unimportant,” “it’s better to let him sit at the computer at home than get in touch with a bad company,” etc.

- attitude to the interests of the child as to something frivolous and unimportant;

- the expectation that there will be no difficulties with the child in the process of growth and maturation;

- categoricalness and authoritarianism when dealing with children and especially with adolescents;

- excessive care and guardianship, or, conversely, connivance and expectation that the child will be able to cope with difficult tasks on their own. Even conflicted and ruffled teenagers readily accept help in resolving difficult situations. During questionnaires and surveys, high school students indicate that they lack the knowledge and life experience to effectively deal with the difficulties they face. And the lack of help and support from parents can push a growing up child to rash actions that will have the most dire consequences. The main thing is that parents help the teenager without reproach and instilling feelings of guilt and helplessness. Then, in a few years, the young man will feel enough strength and experience for responsible decision-making and independent life.

I have listed the most common mistakes. Of course, during the school years, there can be much more problems and difficulties.

6. Lack of readiness to make a conscious choice of a future specialty and Burnout Syndrome in high school students

In recent years, many parents are faced with a situation where their own child, no matter whether a son or a daughter, who did not cause any particular difficulties and problems at school, shows good academic performance, in the future does not know which university and specialty to choose or does not want to continue his studies at all. Some young men who graduated from school choose to join the army in order to be able to think about their future life, get to know themselves better and make a more responsible and adult choice of their future field of activity and specialty.

As a result of various psychological studies of senior pupils and university students, it was found that at the age of 17-18 less than 10% of girls and about 5% of boys have persistent professional interests. All other graduates face serious difficulties answering the question: "Who do I want to be?", "Where to study and what specialty to choose?" Parents should know and take into account this psychological immaturity at this age. In a high-tech world, mastering a demanded and well-paid profession requires a serious investment of time and large intellectual investments. Also in these areas there is serious competition already at the stage of entering a university for an attractive specialty. And some of the graduates, who for the last three years of the school "worked" for high scores in the final exams, after graduation do not feel the strength and desire to continue this exhausting marathon.

The syndrome of emotional burnout in a school graduate is manifested precisely in the fact that, against the background of an apparent (!) Complete well-being and high academic performance, a young man (or girl) does not feel the strength and desire for further education, obtaining a prestigious and highly competitive profession. All efforts were concentrated and spent on passing the final exams well. The young man did not have a long-term life perspective and, due to excessive fatigue, did not develop the ability to distribute his efforts, to highlight important and unimportant stages in obtaining a future specialty.

Both parents and the high school student themselves should remember that the shortest path to a goal is not the fastest or most achievable. It is good if it is possible to discuss not only the basic action plan for obtaining the necessary education and possible employment (the shortest), but also to develop “Plan B”, “C” and so on (depending on the family's capabilities, personal and professional resources of the parents). A more flexible approach to the future of one's own child is more effective precisely because there is no need to concentrate as much as possible on only one opportunity and a possible first failure will not become catastrophic and fatal in the life and fate of a young man and his parents.

7. Recommendations for parents of schoolchildren

- Be authoritative, not authoritarian for your own children.

- The choice of school should be based on the interests and capabilities of the child, and not on their own ambitions.

- The priority should be a good relationship with your own child! This is what will allow you to effectively cope with various difficulties in the process of growing up a child.

- Parents need to adapt to a constantly changing world. For this, it should be borne in mind that at school it is much more important to motivate the child to study and maintain his interest in any area of knowledge. If the child retains the motivation and desire to learn new things in something, to read additionally, then in the future this area can become a profession! And this is much more important than school performance. Deep knowledge, professionalism and quality of work are much more important than the marks in the certificate and points on the exam, and the prestige of the university where your own child will study.

- It is important to maintain your own health and well-being, to attract children to an active lifestyle: observe the daily routine, be outdoors, choose active rest for yourself. Children learn the way of life of their parents and learn only from real examples. You can speak a lot and correctly, and the child can sincerely agree with the opinion of the parents, and behave the way the parents do.

- Life is not a fighting ring, but movement on ever-changing waters. Therefore, it is important to have long-term goals and remember to live in the present moment. Then both you and your children will have enough strength to implement the most ambitious plans.

The problems of children are almost always the problems of their parents … If a child has any difficulties and the family cannot cope with them on their own, then it is worth contacting professional psychologists. It is much faster to get rid of "fresh" problems. If the difficulties have become chronic, then it may take more time to eliminate them.

If parents are afraid to contact a psychologist with the problems that have arisen with the child, then it is worth finding special literature on child psychology. Then it will be possible to understand some of the reasons for the difficulties that parents faced in raising a child. Perhaps, after reading psychological literature on parenting, it is much easier to choose a specialist with whom to work on changing the situation with the child.