"I DON'T WANT TO ADAPT TO THE GENERAL IDEAL!" INTROVERTS HAVE THE RIGHT TO THEIR APPEARANCE

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

"I DON'T WANT TO ADAPT TO THE GENERAL IDEAL!" INTROVERTS HAVE THE RIGHT TO THEIR APPEARANCE.

Only those who are confident, sociable and active can be successful? Or are sensitive, sometimes shy and thoughtful, capable of reaching the top?

Today, extraversion is considered a more attractive personality style than introversion. Cultivated companionship, "hanging tongue", a demonstration of happiness. And sensitivity, seriousness, thoughtfulness are relegated to the background.

Sometimes introverts feel the pressure of society. As if something was wrong with them. If you are more silent, do not come into contact easily and quickly, then this is alarming. Although in reality everything is fine with you. There are various reasons why introverts may not "run" into contact at great speed: selectivity in communication, the absence of the need for general conversations (how are things, like the weather, etc.), immersion in inner experiences, etc.

Most of us are so used to information noise and clip thinking that it has become a part of social culture. Accordingly, fluent communication at the top takes root more and more. For many people, it is more difficult to see and feel the "quiet beauty" than to admire the outer brilliance.

What kind of person is considered to be successful? Active, bright, sociable, demonstrating confidence, busy. And if a person does not have a hundred things to do, and he does not constantly run somewhere, but calmly, thoughtfully goes about his business. Can't such a person be successful?

Sometimes introverts, because of the generally accepted ideal, begin to distort themselves and try to be what they are not, even without knowing it. Sometimes it can start as early as childhood. For example, a child sees that they communicate more and want to be friends with those children who communicate with many, demonstrate openness, and tell fascinatingly about their life. And when you are more silent, shy, you feel more alone. Then the child can decide to be more open, sociable, in spite of his peculiarities.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to be more sociable, but the question is the reason for this desire and the way of realization. If this happens through the devaluation of their qualities and characteristics, and is a forced measure, then the realization of this desire will occur through violence against oneself. And violence against oneself is a strong distortion of oneself. Therefore, if you feel that it is difficult for you to interact with the outside world because of your silence, modesty, isolation, fear of communication, then you should not forcefully change yourself in order to be accepted by others. The best thing is to come to a psychologist and in joint work - to understand yourself deeper, see your strengths, feel and appropriate your own value, work through fears and clamps, and find the right way to interact with the world around you.

Of course, the qualities of introverts are just as valuable as those of extroverts. And the distribution of qualities is conditional. After all, extroverts can be sensitive and thoughtful. But in our time, a certain ideal is being formed and imposed. As a result, such valuable qualities as sensitivity, silence, thoughtfulness, the ability to concentrate on one thing, the ability to immerse yourself in inner experiences fade into the background. And in vain, “after all, numerous brilliant ideas, works of art and inventions, from the theory of evolution and Van Gogh's“Sunflowers”to personal computers, were born in the minds of calm and thoughtful people who knew how to tune in to the inner world and what treasures to look for there. Without introverts, the world would be devoid of: the theory of relativity, Chopin's nocturnes, "In Search of Lost Time" by Proust, "Peter Pan", "1984" and "Animal Collective Farm" by Orwell, Google, a series of books about Harry Potter, etc. " - Susan Kane, The Power of Introverts.

Whether you are an extrovert or an introvert, listen to your personality and needs. Build your eco-friendly way of interacting with the world around you.

Psychologist Linda Papitchenko