2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
In LOVE, it can be difficult to appropriate what you see in another. Realize that it is yours.
All this excitement, all this sunshine and butterflies around the person you fall in love with - these are not his butterflies, but mine.
It can be difficult to separate, to understand that it is me who is applying the filter and I see you beautiful.
It's mine. My light from within, with which I illuminate you.
My condition.
And then if it can be appropriated, then it is somehow easier.
Somehow freer.
When you understand that these are butterflies and fireworks created by me.
Separating this from the person you are imposing on, it is easier not to depend on whether he calls or does not call, caresses, promises or not.
There is an opportunity to experience the state itself. Rise, euphoria, pleasant excitement.
Of course, you can grieve in parallel, if it doesn't work out, because you wanted to. But it certainly doesn't destroy totally.
But the main thing is freedom from the other. The ability to survive rejection, imperfection, well, in general, something that does not fit into the ideal image that was created with his own hand (actually hormonal)))
Return the focus of attention to yourself when it has been sticking out for a long time in another. Because they themselves moved it there. It is very important to understand that I myself organized this way, simply shifted the focus of attention from myself to another, and now I am fascinated with it with terrible force. Does this mean complete disappointment in the person? Of course not. A lover can be really very good, and everything can work out for you as a couple, and a long-term marriage, and a bunch of kids. But the appropriation of one's state to oneself is still very useful, it is like regaining self-worth.
And it happens that, having appropriated a state for yourself, you understand that there was nothing interesting in the person on the contrary, that all this was your fantasy. In any case, it helps to separate reality from illusion.
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