Effective And Ineffective Dealing With Alcoholism - A Metaphor

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

At one time, I stopped consulting patients with alcoholism when it became obvious that work with addictions is a multi-layered, multi-vector, global work, and it cannot be dealt with as if between cases. However, codependent alcoholic families are often rich in various kinds of psychosomatic pathologies. Therefore, sooner or later, psychotherapy of codependent psychosomatic relatives of alcoholic patients poses the question of how to explain to my client that the situation of family struggle with alcoholism cannot be solved by coding, threats, etc. For this, I came up with a metaphor that not only explains why such methods are ineffective, but also expands the relative's understanding of the problem of alcoholism as a psychosomatic pathology.

*****

Imagine a large plot of land - a field planted with exotic fruits. On one side of this site there is a metro station, on the other side a high-rise building in which many people live. There is other transport, but the stops are far away, the transport is constantly clogged, it takes a long time to wait, it is more expensive, etc. And the metro is nearby, it always has free space, because there are few people, it is cool in summer, warm in winter, the only inconvenience is that you can only get to it through this private field. Therefore, the owner fenced him off with a fence, but people realized that he was rarely there, made a hole in the fence and began to gradually trample the road. One passed, the other - the road becomes wider, expensive fruits are trampled, etc. But people are different. Someone looks at all this, he is ashamed and he goes to the minibus, despite the fact that it is not very convenient, and the other brazenly walks across the field, the third (child) does not know at all that you can get to school differently, etc. The owner of the field discovers this whole situation, and patches holes, hangs signs with an inscription about fines, appeals to conscience, writes that there is a hidden camera, etc. But the people still make a new hole in another place and trample a new path. In the police and in court, such a person will always give bribes, and will always find how to get out. In summer, people leave for summer cottages and on vacation, the path is overgrown, but only until they return again. Thus, the situation can be solved in two ways - either remove the subway, or remove the house. But the owner is a simple person and he cannot do this, so the maximum that he can do is a stronger fence with barbed wire under tension. Otherwise, his whole life is a continuous struggle with the crowd.

*****

large plot of land - planted field = it's part of the brain

Metro station = this is alcohol (starting the "drink" program). Just as the metro helps a person to get somewhere, so alcohol helps a person to reach the state to which he aspires.

high-rise building = this is the reason. Nobody understands why it was in this place and who and when built it, but it exists. So the reason, no one knows what, no one knows where and who is to blame for it, but it is.

many people = these are catalysts. As completely different people live in the house, with different fates, etc., so exactly in the chain from cause to alcohol there can be many contributing factors. These are friends (residents of apartment 2), and holidays (apartment 3), and the wife of a bitch (apartment 4), and poor work (apartment 5), lack of money (apartment 6), friends (apartment 7), like-minded people (square, hobby (square 9), lack of faith (square 10), etc., etc.

other transport = alternative methods by which a person solves his problems. Sports, hobbies, communication, church, psychologist, etc.

someone looks at all this, he is ashamed and he goes to the minibus = it is willpower. It is different for everyone, but no one is deprived of it.

the owner fenced him = the ban of loved ones on drinking, which, as necessary, breaks down at the first opportunity

one passed, the other, the road gets wider, the fruits are trampled = this is how any habit is formed. In the brain, there is a connection between events, and the more often this is repeated, the stronger this connection becomes, right down to the reflex. As long as this connection exists, a weak-willed person will use it, and even if a new connection appears, this will be a priority. This is how the brain works. That. if there is a desire to remove this connection, figuratively it is necessary to make it impossible to move along this path.

hangs signs about fines, writes that there is a hidden camera = one of the methods to break this link is encoding. More often than not, coding is nothing more than intimidation. That. the one who more fearfully lends itself to coding, stops drinking and "stops walking this path."

in the police and court, such a person will always give bribes = this is a relationship with codependent loved ones. The tougher the "guard", the higher the likelihood that at some point no one will crawl through the hole. But the "guard" cannot stand there forever. Similarly, loved ones cannot constantly control and there will always be some reason.

the most he can do is a tighter fence with energized barbed wire = drug treatment. Its purpose is to prevent the brain from using this connection, and to stimulate activity to use alternative options. Therefore, doctors always say “we can make the road to the metro inaccessible, but if a person CAM does not want to use minibuses, trams, etc., it will be ineffective, short-lived”, i.e. we can help to heal, but if the person himself wants it.

people leave for summer cottages and vacations = a rehabilitation center, which is tantamount to the fact that a person moves to a place where there is no metro, and most importantly there is no home with its residents (no bad company, no constant stress, etc.). But after that he comes back and first drives the minibus out of habit, and then he looks that all the neighbors are wandering across the field and says to himself "well, just once, otherwise I'm very late today" and starts all over again.

remove the subway = almost unrealistic option. Just as no one will clean the metro station because of someone's garden, so no one will destroy alcohol from the face of the earth because of someone's alcoholism.

clean the house = in general, it is possible to redeem a house, given its incomprehensible and illogical origin, constant conflict and the value of the owner's fruits. This is a psychotherapeutic approach, which consists in finding and leveling each of the causes. There will be no home, there will be no people, there will be no need to go to the metro through someone else's garden, there will be no person facing the choice of a convenient metro and an inconvenient but correct minibus, etc. There will be no reason to drink, there will be no catalysts in the form of bad company, society, problems, etc.

Just as it is not easy to clean a house all at once, it is not easy to find and eliminate psychological causes. Therefore, only the complex work of "strong fence and parallel resettlement of residents" becomes effective (you can start with a "vacation" in a rehabilitation center). Drug treatment alone does not give a lasting result if a person does not solve his psychological problems that make him drink, and methods of intimidation, distraction and long-term psychotherapy cannot be effective when a constantly open field of options is in front of our eyes.

It is important to remember that in a global sense, alcoholism is incurable precisely because the nerve connections from the brain do not disappear anywhere, they can only fade away, but at the first opportunity they can resume. Therefore, a person can drink down and drink in 20-30 years, when suddenly "one of the residents of the old house, for nostalgia, wants to walk across the field and rush to the metro." And a person begins to feel nostalgic when his life loses color, taste and interest.