How Insecurity Steals Your Desires

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

For life to be enjoyable and fulfilling, we need our desires to come true. Even if not often, and for their implementation, we need to make certain efforts, but desires (dreams) can still come true.

But in order for them to come true, they must, at least, have, and it is our own sincere desires that make life better. Self-confident people with adequate self-esteem usually have no problems with this. Such people, soberly assess the situation and their capabilities, this allows them to want what they themselves and their loved ones need.

When a person has problems with self-confidence, things look completely different. An insecure person over time simply abandons most of his desires. This happens when a positive assessment from others is very important for a person. For an insecure person, it is often this assessment that becomes the yardstick of what can and cannot be desired.

The trouble is that desire by itself does not disappear anywhere. The person himself, as it were, fenced off from him, over time it becomes a habit and the person begins to forget about them. Or his desires, these are desires that others approve. If an insecure person is asked what he wants or what his own (cherished) desires are, then most likely there will be a pause in the conversation.

Our desires are based on the need to feel something. After all, when they come true, we feel joy, satisfaction, emotional uplift. An insecure person with positive feelings is not doing well either. Very often such people cannot establish contact with themselves. It can be extremely difficult for them to praise themselves for something. For them, praise is either something forbidden, or they believe that others should praise them, but not themselves.

As a rule, the feelings of such people, especially in relation to themselves, have a negative connotation. Add to this the habit of doubting the correctness of your decisions, there can be no big positive, and, accordingly, desires under such conditions. An exception may be the desire not to be mistaken, so as not to receive condemnation from others.

But, such a desire makes a person dependent on the opinions of others, on their values and life aspirations. In a similar situation, insecure people acquire addiction, which, under certain conditions, can turn into a depressive state. At the same time, uncertainty is sometimes perceived by people as something familiar, even if it interferes with "a little" living condition. But, in fact, the worst thing is that self-doubt deprives a person of his own desires.

You can develop self-confidence, although you will have to change many of your beliefs, thinking patterns, and habits. However, without this, it is almost impossible for a person to make his life happy. Of course, this takes time, but it is better to spend it on yourself than on the realization of other people's desires.

Live with joy! Anton Chernykh.