2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Self-confidence is closely related to how much a person has developed the ability to communicate with himself. This is the ability to understand your desires, to distinguish them from needs. A confident person not only knows what he wants, but also understands what actions he needs to take to achieve the desired result.
Often such actions can be associated with the solution of some controversial or conflict situations. At the same time, a person who has adequate self-esteem and a level of aspirations goes to the solution of such conflict situations, I understand that without this he will not get what he wants.
With an insecure person, everything is completely different. For him, any conflict is, in fact, a very unpleasant emotional experience. Moreover, the discomfort that such a person can experience sometimes becomes for him almost the main reason not to enter into conflict.
At the same time, it should be understood that solving a conflict situation is not a rejection of one's claims and acceptance of the opponent's position, but a search for solutions that will satisfy both parties.
Quite often, an insecure person, fearing and not wanting to experience such a state of emotional discomfort, finds himself in conditions where he has to give up, for this reason, his own desires. But the point is that we cannot completely abandon desire. Then a person with low self-esteem has desires that he can achieve without getting into conflict. Often, these are not even his own desires, but borrowed from someone. Simply put, this is something that can be obtained without much effort.
At the same time, such a person develops such a feature as the accumulation of experience in avoiding conflicts. He not only justifies his fear of emotional discomfort, he also justifies it (often very logically), first of all, of course, for himself. And over the years, this experience becomes more and more.
But the acquisition of such experience often leads to sad consequences. Uncertainty deprives a person of contact with himself. He ceases to desire something himself. Moreover, quite often such people answer a simple question "What do you want?" find it difficult straightaway to answer.
In addition, such consequences of self-doubt lead to the fact that a person begins to feel that he has little internal energy. And this, first of all, suggests that a person has an emotional connection with himself at a very low level. After all, it is emotions that are responsible for our internal energy. And if a person lacks satisfaction from the fulfillment of his desires, then there are few positive experiences (emotions), to put it mildly.
Self-doubt not only negatively affects the quality of a person's life in the present, depriving him of desires, but can also lead to more serious consequences, in the form of depressive states.
Live with joy! Anton Chernykh
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