"The Husband Is Returning From A Business Trip " Or A Folk Story Of Treason

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

"The husband is returning from a business trip …" or the People's story of treason

The people are wise and do not always believe that the "forbidden fruit", that is, intrigues outside of marriage, frees relationships from routine and everyday life, gives a feeling of novelty and internal uplift, and allows surprisingly pleasant alternation of "weekdays" and "holidays". The main thing is not to forget with whom what. Not certainly in that way. Familiar to all of us anecdotes about betrayal reveal many pitfalls of popular perception, in which instructive thoughts are heard.

1. About indifference

A woman says to her lover:

- Dear, my husband is such a lazy person, does nothing at home, sharpen my knives, please.

The lover sits, sharpens knives and thinks:

- I wonder who sharpens knives in my house?

The wife explains to her husband why she cheated on him with a random young man.

- He came in so thin, dirty, ragged, hungry … Well, I allowed him to wash, fed him, gave him drink, gave your old shirt and suit … And he asks: "Tell me, do you have anything else than your husband enjoys"

It is sometimes useful to look at the situation and yourself from the outside. Shake up the dressing room and think - do I really need all these countless inexpensive, bought "on the occasion" blouses with sequins, or should I stop at something worthwhile? So it is with betrayal: often one is replaced by another, for fleeting relationships on the side, we forget why we, in fact, needed a marriage? If the epiphany has come, then it is worth summing up valuable assets and deciding for ourselves what is really important to us in a relationship, what has ceased to suit, or even did not suit at all initially? Why are we "undercover", what are we running from? Or maybe "sharpening knives" is just what we have always appreciated in our marriage, and by depriving ourselves of this, we are depriving ourselves of something important? And if there is no longer the slightest desire to "sharpen knives" but the situation is fine - keep the status quo, accept that someone else might be doing this in your home.

2. About freedom

Before going on vacation to Turkey, a woman asks her husband:

- Dear, what should I bring you?

- I do not care. Now everyone is treating"

Freedom in marriage is needed only as much as it suits both. Much better do not suffer from remorse, do not feel like a traitor, do not hide your eyes and unforeseen expenses, but define with your partner the boundaries of what is permissible. Unless otherwise suggested, anything that is not prohibited is permitted.… However, if the calmness to each other goes off scale and does not bind anything except obligations, then you can safely pack your bags and enjoy freedom without hurting the other. Although if both like such games and after each episode a stormy reconciliation follows, giving unforgettable emotions of passion, then why not?

3. About goals

Courtroom. Divorce proceedings in progress.

Referee:

- Why do you want to divorce your husband?

- And he does not suit me in bed!

Female voices from the audience:

- Everyone is happy, but she is not happy!

Male voices:

- Yes, nobody suits her at all!"

Somewhere in us there is a persistent conviction that our half is obliged to accept us as we are, while we ourselves rarely bother to work on ourselves and cherish our exclusivity and originality. This is a slippery slope, because there is always a chance to face the same beliefs in your partner and sincerely wonder how such a misunderstanding as marriage "with this terrible insensitive person" became possible. This is also the case when it would be nice to "bring debit with credit" and try to understand what we are and what we want from life in general and from a partner in particular. If you suddenly feel that the whole world is against you and no one can understand your subtle nature, maybe it’s a matter of nature, since you cannot choose another world? Determine for yourself what you want from a partner, what you are ready to give in, and where you will lie down for the most expensive - this will give you the opportunity to set priorities, bring certainty into your life and relieve unnecessary stress and anxiety from constant misunderstanding of the situation … Perhaps the reason for your search on the side is not the lack of a partner, but the abundance of your merits? Then betrayal has an undeniable advantage for you - every time you discover something new in yourself and continue to learn the world. So is it worth stopping if is life for you an uninterrupted joy of knowledge?

4. About trust

"Dear, I looked at your mistress and decided - this is not treason! This is a feat!"

"Listen, do you have an honest wife?"

Often deceived spouses ask perplexedly: "What did he find in her (him)?" Because they rarely understand that the very fact of the relationship on the side is more important, and not their subject … And the desire to have an affair, as a rule, is associated not so much with the fact that the partner knows you as flaky (and this is usually just not the case, because people who know each other well know how to negotiate and understand mutual interests) and your marriage has lost its acuity, but with the fact that partners have outgrown each other. In such situation trusting relationships are becoming an important condition for the preservation of marriage, spouses become more and more friendswho are comfortable living together, raising children, having financial or other obligations, still spending time together, but not sharing a bed. This side of life is being replaced by hobbies, creativity, or another partner.

5. About friendship

"- Listen, your wife is such a laughing matter! I met her yesterday in the library, told a joke, so she almost fell out of bed with laughter!"

"If a friend suddenly turned out to be" … the lover (s) of your half, then this does not always need to be immediately explained by promiscuity or malicious intent. Think about why you are friends, what has connected you for so many years? Perhaps what you like so much about him was also liked by your partner? These are the very traits that complement you, give you the feeling of strong bonds. No wonder that a person who is part of the closest social circle and causes a feeling of warmth, attracts other people close to you … Women in such a situation burn bridges, get rid of their girlfriends ("the snake has been warmed on the chest"), which gives grounds for others to believe that female friendship does not exist. And men usually prefer to lose their marriage than to lose a friend. Both are justified, but! Your partner is not your property, think about it, is it possible to benefit from the situation? Compare what you have, but the friend is missing, "work on the mistakes." If marriage is important to you, then such an episode will benefit will force partners to understand themselves, help to become closer to each other. And if it’s not important, but you don’t want to destroy it, then “sin shamelessly, soundly,” taking on the side what you lost in marriage.

6. About resourcefulness

“The husband is returning from a business trip. The wife barely had time to hide her lover behind the TV.

The husband entered and immediately turned on the TV, began to watch hockey.

The wife does not know how to call him from the room, shouts from the kitchen:

- Wan, go quickly, what I will show, you will be stunned!

- No, no, you yourself come here, so surely you will be stunned.

Then the Canadian was removed for two minutes, so he was naked across our room."

Fill your marriage with humor, because there is nothing worse when your partner takes everything seriously and is obviously convinced of your mental and worldly inferiority. Set the heat! There should be a place for spontaneity and planned randomness in life. Experiment, and the marriage will open up to you from new sides!