Telepathy And Empathy

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

I wanted to write the rules for flirting, but there is one thing without which it is dangerous to enter into a relationship. Empathy … Empathy is misunderstood, confused with identification. And these are not just different, but in many respects mutually exclusive things. Due to a misunderstanding, they often say something like: she loved him so much, she gave him so much empathy, and he used it. Or: I showed great empathy for her, and she cheated on me with my friend. It's about something else. True empathy is inherently closer to telepathy. High-profile empaths exhibit such miracles that they can easily be mistaken for telepaths. To pump empathy means to be able to find the keys to any person and a way out of any conflict. And in general, full empathy pumping is the highest level of love resource pumping. Although for other resources empathy is also useful and there it is also necessarily pumped. Without developed empathy, there can be no mature ego. Of course, I will not tell you how to become an empath at the telepathic level in the post, the maximum is how to slightly increase empathy. But let's first figure out what it is. The first clear definition of empathy was given by Sigmund Freud, saying that in order to influence a patient, it is necessary to take into account his mental state, and in order to take it into account, you need to be able to put yourself in his place, taking into account all the nuances of his situation, to feel the way he feels, to compare with your state and only then get a real idea. Pay attention, it is not enough to put yourself in the place of a person and feel, it is important to compare with your state, only then is assessment and understanding possible, otherwise there is no empathy as such, but only identification … With empathy, your state remains the same, does not change, otherwise there will be nothing to compare with.

Identification - This is the identification of oneself with another, in which the previous state of health is lost. Empathy impossible because there is nowhere to return and nothing to compare with. It is as if a diver decided to study the bottom of the sea, sank there and drowned. Is his skill a useful and valuable quality? Identifying with another person and forgetting yourself is not empathy, since it is fundamentally different in result and meaning. Empathy gives the opportunity to influence the other, and identification - gives the other the opportunity to influence you. Identification is sometimes viewed as a kind of valuable gift, that is, not only is it confused with empathy, but it is also believed that this is the highest level of empathy - complete merging and self-denial. And for this unnecessary sacrifice, they want to receive bonuses in the form of love and gratitude. This is so childishly self-centered that one cannot resist the metaphor and again not remember the child proudly carrying his pot to his mother. To stop confusing God's gift with an omelet, or even worse, let's see what happens during identification. At the physical level, at the material level, no merging occurs, the person with whom the lover identifies himself remains on his own and may not even know about him. The merger takes place in the psychic field of the lover himself, in this field a person is created, an image that seems to the person identical to the beloved, but in fact can be very different from him. Since the egocentric is fixated on himself, his field is filled only with his problems and desires, he sculpts a person that is almost always similar to his own ideal self and ideal parental figure. This person turns out to be similar to a real person only externally, and even then not very much, since the egocentric is extremely inattentive. And this is what happens to this person identification person. Yes, the person is associated with a physical person, so the lover wants to constantly contact him, he really needs feedback. The person occupies such an important place in his field that the entire tension of this field depends only on her.(I talk about field tension in the concept of Kurt Lewin). A person wants intimacy, a person needs confirmation of what he has invented, it is difficult for his illusions to compete with reality, so he can suffer and constantly seek the location of a person. He can even invest on the physical plane, that is, do some work for a loved one and give him material values. This is exactly what gigolos, hunters and just people who find themselves in a position of pluses in an imbalance use, and do not understand why this cannot be done (the temptation of pluses is very great, I already wrote about this, since the minus is constantly trying to pull on the emotions of the plus, and you need not have only ethics, but also an understanding of what is happening in order to prevent the exploitation of the minus). The material values that the minus gives to the plus (if it gives) are certainly a victim, but is it itself a victim? identification? Why is she to someone who, by an unfortunate accident, became an object for creating a person in love in the field? The lover identified himself and merged with the person, and the person from this is only a problem, if he is not a conscious fraud, who knows how it can be materially used. You can't use it except materially (taking money). That is why I always use the gigolo as an example. The usual pluses, which do not take money away from the minuses, most often remain at a loss, even if from the outside it seems that they somehow "use" the minuses for self-affirmation. No, they often lose more.

Egocentrism (and narcissism as a pathological degree of egocentrism) interferes with the development of empathybecause the egocentric is capable of either alienating another from himself, or appropriating and identifying with him. Due to this, the narcissist cannot be a subtle manipulator, and in general, an egocentric is not capable of this, by definition. The egocentric is focused on himself and he can become interested in others only if he can identify himself with him. He is not interested in anything in the world except himself, so he physically cannot understand anyone, since understanding includes what Freud described "to put himself in the place of a man, to return to himself, to compare him and his state, to draw a conclusion." For illustration, an example. Let's say a friend asks you to rate his essay. You take this composition and from the first lines begin to correct it with enthusiasm. He writes "I was born in Omsk", you cross out and write "in Kaliningrad" because you were born there. He writes "my grandmother was a teacher," you cross out and write who your grandmother was. Then you rewrite how he treated his grandmother, because with your grandmother everything was a little different. To the surprised question of a friend why, you say that from the very first lines you were very carried away. And in response to his offense, you say that he should be grateful to you, because you felt the unity of your souls. This is how lovers often behave. An egocentric can only love himself, and if he loves another, he also loves himself in him. Empathy - this is something completely different, this is the separation of boundaries and the ability not only to feel in the place of another person in all the nuances of his situation, but also to return to his place in order to reflect. The diver must come up to the depth, otherwise the pearls that he found at the bottom of the sea will remain where they were, and the fish will eat them. Ability to empathy physiologically inherent in every person (mirror neurons and other capabilities of the brain for the most accurate reflection of the processes occurring in other people), however, this is only a potential ability, and the real ability develops only in the process of activity. Development activities empathy - this is a manifestation of a bright and emotional interest in other people while maintaining their own position of an observer. This is the ability to exist in two spaces at the same time. This is what Gurdjieff taught when he made you deeply and emotionally involved, and then remember yourself and quickly return to yourself. For this, for example, Gurdjieff would hit an enthusiastic student on the shoulder and say "Remember!" Many of Gurdjieff's techniques have remained secret or distorted by the narrators, so I cannot recommend them to anyone. In addition, I am not serious about any techniques if they are not integrated into real activity, because in this case spontaneity and will are separated, and nothing good comes of it. It works well neither when a person acts rationally, nor when he turns off his head altogether, but when he manages to achieve the state of "mind with heart in harmony", that is, to act in a flow, spontaneously, but at the same time consciously. And this ability develops only with the gradual pumping of various resources, when energy begins to suffice.

But here are some tips for those looking to increase empathy. 1. Do not conduct mental dialogues with people, especially significant ones. This increases personalization and reduces empathy … You are not talking to them, but to yourself. No tactile sensations and brightness of emotions are a sign that the image was created accurately, you saturate it with your own energy, moving away from real perception. 2. When talking with another person, often look at the subject of the conversation through his eyes. Do not think about your feelings and feelings constantly, sometimes lose your temper and look from the outside at yourself and what is happening. Do not be afraid of depersonalization, as long as you do it consciously, you develop this muscle and control the process. 3. Become interested in something more often, forgetting about yourself, that is, without drawing yourself personally into the field of this interest. There is no need to try on absolutely everything that you see, hear, read. Learn to enjoy things that are not directly related to you, from strangers to you and stories that do not concern you. 4. Don't confuse the previous tip with personalization. Sometimes people on the physical level separate boundaries, and on the mental, on the contrary, they merge. For example, romantic knights did this, settling the persona of the Lady in their field, communicating with her, loving her and even having sex with her (in late romanticism). It is not enough to separate oneself from a person in real life, one must also learn to separate him in the psychic field, but at the same time love him and be interested in him as before. 5. Conducting all these experiments with your psyche, do not be zealous and fear alienation. Alienation and depreciation do not contribute in any way empathy … If you managed to divide the boundaries, but the person ceased to interest you, then his devaluation has occurred. Remember, egocentrics can only either merge or separate, alienating and devaluing the object, and empaths are capable of experiencing strong emotions, love, interest, delight, even passion for someone (and something), but at the same time they feel the separateness and subjectivity of the other a person, and hence his own separateness and subjectivity.

(C) Marina Komissarova