2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
A married couple does not always seek to resolve sexual problems. They can serve as a distraction from more complex issues related to relationships with each other or in choosing a partner. And those who dare to make changes in their intimate life may lie in wait for unexpected discoveries.
Helen Kaplan writes in her work "Sexual Therapy": “… if a married couple has latent conflicts and problems in the relationship, then it is often possible to observe resistance to sex therapy intervention on the part of these spouses. They can counteract the improvement in their sexual behavior. Often the patient himself sabotages the treatment, as he or she foresees the normalization of the sexual sphere of his partner and considers such a normalization as a personal threat.
A couple may think that some kind of dilemma in sex is the cause of their unhappiness and dissatisfaction, but in reality everything is probably much deeper. Often, before starting to work with a sexological complaint, you have to deal with the relationship, and this is a longer process.
Repressed grievances and the inability to show anger, shame to express their requests, often cause reduced attraction, pain and vaginal spasms during coitus, difficulties with erection and orgasm.
All these symptoms help not to notice sharp corners, not to touch on painful and "dangerous" topics in a relationship. If you get rid of them, then some thoroughly avoided truth about yourself and others is exposed. And of course, this will entail the need to change something in their behavior, and whether people after that will suit each other is a question. There is a lot of fear in this, but also the possibility of creating deeper bonds of the soul.
It is imperative to establish communication and restore trust in a couple! Because, after that, the chances of achieving sexual harmony are greatly increased!
But, sometimes a banana is just a banana! Different ideas about how intimacy should take place. Inconsistencies in the types of sexual constitution and inability to agree on the frequency and volume of contact. Different tactile preferences. Someone wants to pay more attention to one aspect of the interaction and he silently waits for the other to guess. When periods of interest in new experiences and experimentation in one partner do not resonate with the other. Fear of sharing your erotic fantasies. If in a couple the attraction goes away due to boredom, which may hide resentment at the inappropriate sex technique. When there really is a sexological problem and no significant difficulties in the relationship. In this case, you can go directly to the solution of these particular issues.
How things are in a particular couple, what exactly is the difficulty, which will determine the route out of the impasse, is diagnosed at the initial consultation.
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