Who's To Blame That The Relationship Is Falling Apart

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Often, speaking about the relationship between a man and a woman, people imply what kind of experience they have in this matter, and not always focusing on its usefulness. Today I want to consider a few points that in most cases either ruin the relationship, or make it completely unbearable for both partners.

Let's start with such a thing as blackmail. Emotional blackmail is used in relationships by both men and women. It looks like an attempt to prove your worth to another. “I did so much for you, and you, ungrateful pig,” is a familiar phrase, isn't it? This is reminiscent of a retailer trying to get money from a merchant, only here instead of money there is a need for gratitude. But when this happens in the form of a scandal, one can hardly count on a sincere manifestation of positive feelings. The value that needs to be proven is not the default value. Although there is an option that for one it is valuable, but for another it is not, and the other does not need it. Sometimes it happens.

The next option is when people show their dissatisfaction in the form of silence, or with a dissatisfied look, they answer in monosyllables, showing how much they are disappointed. In whom? Of course, in a partner or in a partner. Without entering into open conflict, with such behavior they put pressure on the partner.

Resentment is another way to build relationships, or rather the one who is nearby. What a grudge, what silence or blackmail have their purpose prove your innocence. Moreover, what is interesting, when a person uses an offense, the first degree of real guilt does not matter, and the second is that a person becomes, it is very beneficial to remind another about this offense. That is, one gets a long-playing tool for manipulating the other. But the most important thing is that people know how to be offended, and how to stop doing it, they do not quite understand. Sometimes a person does not even know what the other must do in order to deserve forgiveness.

Go ahead, reproaches. Everything on which we focus our attention or the attention of a person who is next to us begins to grow. Any lie, repeated many times, begins to be perceived as true. This is the basis of any propaganda. In relationships, with the help of reproaches, people themselves convince their partners, and those, in the end, believing in this, really become such, acquiring the traits in which they were reproached. But this is not a reason to think that the partner is to blame for all the troubles. It is worth pondering what people themselves do with their life partners. There is an anecdote on this topic when a man divorces and says that his wife has become bad, and his mother reminds him that at the beginning of the relationship he really liked the woman, and became bad after living together. The question is, who messed up? This is true for everyone, regardless of gender.

Another point that does not improve the relationship. This is a condescending attitude as to an inadequate person. "These are men, they are morons" or "She is a woman, what can you take." That is, he or she is like me, just a little dumber. And then communication begins from a position from above, and the partner or partner is spoken of in the same tone both with relatives and friends. How will the person feel at the same time? How will he become, how does he feel about whoever talks about him and speaks to him like that?

But I want the relationship to be more about love, about gratitude, and not about manipulation. If something like this occurs in your relationship, do the following. Point at someone you think is the reason for this state of affairs, and now notice that you point at someone with one finger, and three at yourself. It is worth considering this.

When people use manipulation to build relationships, they get a short-term result, but they have to pay with a lack of sincerity, interest, attention and participation in themselves.

Everyone chooses for himself how to build relationships, but we must remember that the main thing in them is mutual comfort and the desire to continue and develop them.

Live with joy! Anton Chernykh.