Not? The Ideal Psychotherapist

Video: Not? The Ideal Psychotherapist

Video: Not? The Ideal Psychotherapist
Video: Eight Signs of a Good Counselor / Therapist 2024, May
Not? The Ideal Psychotherapist
Not? The Ideal Psychotherapist
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NOT? THE PERFECT PSYCHOTHERAPIST

“A psychotherapist with personal problems, with untreated traumas, with weaknesses and difficulties in life, a psychotherapist who allows himself to show himself like that in everyday life and in front of other people - cannot be a good psychotherapist and help others well” -

I believe that those who think so are categorically mistaken in their opinion.

I study a lot and have seen different specialists in different states. And I remember the cases when it also seemed to me that the person in front of me was inadequate. Especially when his personal painful points, "strings", so to speak, "souls" were touched.

I remember sitting and thinking: “My God, how can he (a) work? I would never go to him (her) …

And this person, a psychologist and a psychotherapist, sits next to you and cries or says nonsense. He is completely confused, indistinct, or, on the contrary, persistently gets stuck in some stupid and not worthy of attention, in your opinion, topic … And you see and hear this person when he talks about his pain and expresses it. You see how he looks for answers to his questions. As he wanders in his "darkness" in search of a way out. And, sometimes, he does not have time to find him …

And then, after a while, this same, quite recently "no" person sits on the "therapist's chair" and begins to work. Work as a psychotherapist with another confused, scared, confused or angry person who for some reason “chose” him.

And working.

Like a professional.

As a specialist.

As a psychotherapist.

He is attentive and sensitive. He monitors what is happening to the client and what is happening to him.

He analyzes.

He “follows” the client, orients, focuses, but does not “lead” with him.

He does the right thing. And what is important is the person in front of him.

After the session, he clearly talks about his impressions, feelings, actions, versions, difficulties and questions.

And there is no doubt that he is completely and completely COMPETENT.

A psychotherapist is not an ideal person. Not a steadfast tin soldier. Not a super successful professional or a super happy family man.

This is a person who has certain experience, knowledge and skills. Able to help other people in certain circumstances (given working frameworks) in some problems, topics and issues. Understand, experience, learn, acquire, learn, receive, etc.

And everything that happens outside the working process, in his life, is his own business.

The psychotherapist is an ordinary person, just like everyone else.

Well, maybe a little less in need of close communication like many people who work with people.

He also has losses and mistakes. Disappointments and crises. He also has "blind spots" and topics that "he has not yet worked through" - it does not matter whether it is seen from the outside or not.

Of course, there are more stable and prosperous people - both people and psychotherapists, but there are some with special features - with a complex personal history and personal limitations, and even with mental illnesses (in remission and even actualized during treatment) and chronic problems.

And at the same time, all these people, if they are well trained, including being aware of their condition and organizing the necessary support for themselves for quality work, are able to help another person cope with the difficulties in his life.

And they do it.

Maria Veresk, psychologist, gestalt therapist.

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