Why Does A Man Need Illegitimate Children?

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Illegitimate children are no longer a surprise, and even more so not a rarity. Maybe this is a new trend? The number of families where the husband is in a parallel relationship is increasing, and as a result of these relationships, the mistress has illegitimate children. Since adultery is still immoral. And a child who sees dad secretly and stealthily from his legal wife and children born in marriage is not the pedagogical and moral guideline that society can be guided by. In addition, the overwhelming majority of men with whom I had to work in conditions of their illegitimate children were themselves not delighted with this situation and none of them referred to the fact that he followed fashion in this matter. Some social categories of wealthy men, indeed, have a fashion for mistresses, but it does not apply to illegitimate children.

Until 2014, there was economic growth in the country. Many men and women were able to secure a high level of income, buy apartments (albeit on a mortgage). Not just wealthy, but consistently (for many years in a row) wealthy men, in a completely logical way, attracted increased attention of women, who for financially pleasant bonuses were ready to put up with the position of mistresses for many years. They, of course, sincerely loved their married lovers, but if they were poor, then the relationship would most likely be clearly shorter. Accordingly, some of these mistresses, wanting to have a child in general - after all, most women want this, all the more they were ready to have a child from a successful married lover. The logic of women is simple: First, a wealthy dad will be able to properly finance his illegitimate child and his mother. Secondly, if his wife finds out about this, she can expel her husband, being sure that he will well support her and her legitimate children after the divorce. Accordingly: an illegitimate child is a direct push for a man to leave the family. Thirdly, for many women, having a child from a married wealthy man is almost the only way to resolve the issue with his own housing, since this man can help with an apartment for his child. Fourthly, it must be remembered that many women are now making good money. Accordingly, some mistresses are ready to give birth to a child from a wealthy married lover and relying on themselves: they already have their own apartment, plus they have their own income or a profitable business (their own or their parents').

And then, that is, now, economics and psychology again play a role. The economy has deteriorated since 2014. There is less money in men's pockets. Competition for them has intensified. Some of the men have ceased to support the illegitimate child altogether. Someone was no longer able to properly pay alimony, and these angry mistresses began to directly or indirectly report this to their wives or go to courts with alimony. That they would finally kick the cheating husband out of the house. Indeed, in the conditions of drying up of the financial flow, it is better for a mistress to switch to a financially more favorable status of a legal wife. And as a last resort, if the man does not leave the family, at least receive guaranteed alimony in the amount of ¼ of the income of the child's father. Indeed, in the presence of car loans or mortgages, the guarantee and regularity of payments is very important.

In addition, it is important to understand that many illegitimate children born in the "well-fed" years 2010-2015 have already grown up, have gone to kindergartens and schools, they themselves communicate with their fathers, walk with them in public places, therefore, the likelihood of their detection by legitimate wives getting higher. Moreover, as the children grow up, their mothers become bolder. They are more actively beginning to defend their women's rights, more pressure on married lovers. And now these men themselves go to psychologists to consult on how to live on and whether the time has come to say goodbye to someone - to his wife or lover.

The situation looks like this:

- about 15% of illegitimate children, These are planned situations when a married man who is in love with his mistress deliberately went to conceive an illegitimate child, since he sincerely planned to leave the family in the coming months or years and raise his given child already married to his mother. At the same time, some of these men even say that by the very conception of this child, they themselves, as it were, spurred on, accelerated the adoption of their decision in favor of their mistress. But, in the future, two-thirds of these men understood that they were still unable to leave the family and the children remained illegitimate forever …

- about 20% of illegitimate children - This planned or spontaneous situations when men went on to conceive illegitimate children because of a sense of guilt in front of their faithful long-term lover. When a woman managed to bind a man and competently manipulate her lover, blame him for her “wasted years” because of him, etc. Or caused guilt about past abortions in the relationship. Which, by the way, actually might not have been. But they could have been.

- about 30% of illegitimate children - this is an outright deception on the part of mistresses, when women deliberately conceived children from married lovers, who at the same time deliberately did not want the birth of illegitimate children and the associated difficulties.

- about 20% of illegitimate children - are conceived at random, due to the simultaneous negligence of lovers and mistresses, when people in their relationships simply go with the flow, not thinking anything. Including - people are little familiar with each other. Or at the moment of conception they were not at all in themselves - in alcoholic or drug intoxication. Conception occurs naturally or the method of contraception does not work (usually interrupted intercourse). Nobody talks about abortions, because there are moral or religious prohibitions, or the woman has already had an experience of abortion (including from this man).

- about 10% illegitimate children are conceived by men at the direct request and activity of women, but against the background of the man's confidence that in the future he will in no way communicate with this woman and his child. These are casual acquaintances women, women by correspondence, work colleagues, communication on business trips, on vacation, etc. Women either confess their strong love, or complain that they cannot have a child from their existing husband, etc.

Well and more about 5% illegitimate children are born on the initiative of the men themselves, who just really want children, but initially do not plan to go to the mother of the illegitimate child. This, or if the man in marriage does not have children at all, or the spouse does not want to have another child, and the family has the means. Or a man simply wants more children for some of his own reasons. And, in gratitude for this, I am ready to buy an apartment for a woman and pay off her debts and promote her career, etc. In this case, men can motivate a woman for IVF or ICSI, so their motivation is high.

Total we get the following picture of illegitimate children - is it a planned strategy or not:

• - approximately at 15% cases, the man planned to go to his mistress;
• - about 20% cases, the man did not know what to do, but did not want to lose his usual mistress and simply went to meet her child's wishes.
• - about 30% cases are deception of men by mistresses
• - about 20% illegitimate children - are conceived by chance, when neither men nor their mistresses have such a plan.
• - about 10% illegitimate children are conceived by men at the direct request of women in the absence of plans to communicate further in life.
• - about 5% illegitimate children are born on the initiative of the men themselves, who really want to have many children from different women.

So, you can see that there is simply no one template of what the man thought about when he planned the appearance of an illegitimate child. There are several templates. Moreover, men are planning something, only 1/3 of all cases of illegitimate children.

It turns out that when conceiving illegitimate children, more often than not, men have the most vague idea of what awaits them, as well as their family and their children? Unfortunately this is the case. Hence, such a large number of difficulties, which then follow. After all, men do not understand the most elementary things about when he will still have illegitimate children:

1. The psychology of a pregnant woman and a woman who has already given birth is very different from the psychology of a woman who is not yet pregnant. Therefore, after the onset of pregnancy, or being left alone with an already born child, such emotional waves roll over a woman that she does not give a damn about all those agreements and plans that took place to be with a man before. Resentment, jealousy, envy of a lawful wife, love for your child, etc. do their job! A woman vomits and flashes, quarrels with the child's father, scandals with his wife, etc.

2. No man can be sure that he will be able to adequately support two families throughout his life

3. No man can be sure that he has enough health to have time to communicate with all his children and women when they do not live together

4. No man knows the strength of his jealousy for a woman and love for an illegitimate child, if suddenly the mother of his illegitimate child falls in love with another man and wants to get married and move far away

5. It is difficult for a man to appreciate the connection with his own legal family until he tries to go to his mistress. And having gone to the illegitimate child and his mother, the man suddenly realizes that without his family he will simply physically die.

Men - be faithful to your family, have children after all in a legal marriage! And then you will save yourself a lot of suffering. Wives - please support your husbands' initiative to bear children! Women who have not yet been married - do not create your own relationships with married men, do not give birth to children from married ones, since each such story is such a set of problems, which, then, has to be unraveled for a whole life.