2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
In Joaquim de Posada's book, Don't Throw on Jujube, an experiment at Stanford University is described.
Preschool children were offered a slice of marmalade, but at the same time, the condition was stipulated that if the child did not eat it right away, he would soon receive another one. Then the adult left the room, and the child remained alone for 15 minutes with a slice of marmalade. What a temptation for a child!
Those children who did not eat the marmalade right away were naturally rewarded.
Over the years, researchers tracked down families of children who participated in the experiment and obtained interesting results.
It turned out that children who did not eat the marmalade and waited for the experimenter to return perform better at school, get along better with other people, and cope better with stress compared to those who ate the marmalade immediately or shortly after the experimenter left them alone. In general, those who resisted the marmalade turned out to be more successful people than those who ate it.
Sometimes experience comes at a high price.
Recently, a mother and daughter came for a consultation. The girl is 10 years old, she has diabetes. And my mother told an amazing story about her girl.
Like all children, my daughter received a gift with sweets at school for the New Year. She knows she can't have sweets. Mom allowed me to eat a little, but on the condition that the sugar level would be measured and, if necessary, additional injections were delivered.
A couple of months later, while cleaning the closet, my mother found a bag of sweets. All of them were bitten a little after all. But just a little bit. On many, only tooth marks were visible. That is, the child took the candy in his mouth, gripped it a little with his teeth, and … took it out of his mouth, and put it back into the bag.
At the same time, the mother says that the girl is not afraid of injections, and puts them quite calmly. That is, after all, it was not the fear of injections that made her give up sweets.
I don't know if it can be said that life itself is the very "deferred reward" for giving up a little momentary pleasure.
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