2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Today I would like to share one of my favorite work practices. It seems to be very simple to perform, but it helps to quickly dive in and explore the meanings that are hidden behind this or that disturbing state. Suitable for independent use, as such an express diagnosis.
The first step is to recognize the condition. What are we going to investigate? I want to tell you by example, and since I have no ethical right to talk about clients, I will tell you about my experience. For example, I recently pondered the word "love", which, in addition to the generally accepted universal meanings, is different for everyone, reflects subjective knowledge and experience, and brings personal meaning. But I didn't understand why I felt sad and anxious when I thought about love. Therefore, I decided to see what is happening there?
The second step is to write a word in a column and without thinking too much, like in free association games, come up with a word for each letter. All the reflection later, now it is important to write down, even if the words come strange, ridiculous, obscene, slang. This is all important, requires attention and respect.
l - weasel
yu - skirt
b - pain
o - oval
c - attraction
b - death
It is important to understand that each incoming word is not spherical in a vacuum, but with a very high probability is somehow connected or associated with the main one.
The third step is to find those words that evoke some kind of response that is consonant with the request. In my example, a lot became clear to me at once, but sometimes this new word also requires unpacking, and then it can also be parsed in the same way as in the second step.
In my example, of course, every word is endowed with my understanding. "Laska" - here it is understandable, affection, care in love, tenderness. "Skirt" is about something feminine, about femininity, about passivity, acceptance. "Pain" is the word that captures the essence of my anxious attitude. Lacking the experience of living with my father, the experience of love of a significant adult man, his protection and support, I had to get the bitter experience of unhappy love because of the choice of cruel partners in every sense. For me, the pain in a relationship was expected, predictable, otherwise it is not love. My love was sacrificial, silent, suffering, sick, in tears and thoughts of death. "Oval" is also about something feminine, round, cyclical. "Attraction" is sexual attraction. "death" - literally, it hurts so much that it is better not to live.
Fourth step.
This is already a delicate work, psychotherapy, when you can carefully explore these manifested values and meanings, deconstructing those ideas that interfere with living, constructing preferred ones, or reformulating in some other way, offering your own unique alternative experience, which also exists, but whose voice is too weak.
The result of the work done is as follows. And these are not contrived forms, but also my experience, which I have strengthened and strengthened for myself.
l - weasel
yu - skirt
b - proximity
o - rest
c - loyalty
b - sadness
I left myself sadness, since the wound from the painful experience of the past years will still sometimes remind me of myself. And let it become my amulet.
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