Sob To Live

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

In the life of each of us there are moments when a deep wound in the soul with unbearable pain and crying becomes the only reaction to the injustice of this world.

But even more often, the socially determining subpersonality tries to correspond to some attitudes, patterns, stereotypes, clamping down on the emotional-sensual sphere of a person.

Such stereotypes operate regardless of gender, age, social status.

So, for example, a mother tells her six-year-old son not to cry. "You are a crybaby! Behaving like a girl!" Well, fears of rejection act as a companion of children's boyish tears. "Once again I will see that you are crying, I will not love! / I will send to the orphanage / I will call the policeman's uncle …".

Fearing that the mother will really do this, the child calms down, nervously sobbing from time to time, but obeys the parent, wiping his eyes.

The residence of the death of a close relative is also regulated by social norms. Men, with a few exceptions, try not to cry, mindful of the inadmissibility of such behavior.

Despite the fact that women are more whiny, less restrained in emotions, nevertheless, here there are a large number of prohibitions on crying.

So, at 6-7 years old, a girl may be faced with such a mother's reply-shout "You are already big! Stop crying!" And often this is followed by a destructive option: "Look at who you look like! How scary you are when you cry!"

Of course, there is no need to say that such words will make a child or adolescent feel better.

Tears, crying, sobbing act as a protective reaction of the body, a powerful breathing exercise, a cleansing agent that allows you to look differently at some of the pressing issues that bother a person.

A love experience with crying and sobbing is often devalued by the relatives themselves.

"Found someone to cry for!" "Wipe your snot, stop acting like a fool!"

Such "parting words" are destructive and create prerequisites for deepening a person's mental crisis.

Growing anxiety, neurotic dependence on social patterns (or rather, on the opinion of mom or "best" friend), decreased self-esteem, depression and many other companions of prohibitions on the expression of emotions. or unwillingness to accept the delicate, vulnerable soul of a person.

Many are ashamed of their tears, but in fact it means that a person rejects himself, suppressing and showing auto-aggression.

And yet, it is better to burst into tears than to suppress emotions.

In crying we will see ourselves as real, natural, we will see "children" with tears not cried, without masks and falsehood. And it is important to capture this moment. Cry, despite the fact that once it was "impossible", cry in order to feel all the pain of the human soul, cry in order to live on …