2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
The woman stood at the window and watched the storm gather. She lived with her husband and two children on the seashore. He went fishing, and she stayed. She looked after the household and took care of the children.
The clouds thickened, the wind intensified, as did her anxiety. She recalled conversations with her husband, in which she asked him to leave these campaigns. Find yourself a business on the shore. She cried and begged him to change jobs, saying that if something happened to him, she would not survive this loss. She urged to leave this business for the sake of children. If he does not return from the sea, how can they grow up without a father? If he loves his family, then he must give up the sea.
To which he replied that this was the last time, because they needed money. And that was his love for her and for the children. But he also loved the sea, and it was terrible for him to stay on the shore. And he chose to deceive her, saying that this was the last time.
And now she was walking around the house and was angry, fearing that something would happen to him. She felt despair and powerlessness. Accusing him of not protecting her.
Such experiences appeared when a thunderstorm arose. And the rest of the time she was calm, not forgetting to remind him about his promise.
Over time, he was going to sea again, assuring that this was the last time. She was offended. He promised, and she believed. But everything remained in place. It was like a game - he said that he was taking care of the family, and she was taking care of him. Both experienced, but did everything in the old way, so that nothing would change. For them, this was life …
They created distance as soon as tension and anxiety built up between them. When the husband went to sea, there was a place of love and care. This is how they kept the family together. They didn’t ask what would happen if he stayed ashore? What then?
When he went fishing, the woman was left alone with her thoughts and experiences. Loneliness … She felt loneliness and fear. What if he doesn't come back? Then she will be left alone with two children, and what can she do? She had a profession, but she did not like it.
She wanted to be engaged in sewing clothes. At times I sewed for the neighbors. They liked what she was doing.
She consulted with her husband, asked if she could go to fashion design courses? And he replied that this was unnecessary, because it was enough that the fishing industry brings. She was afraid to tell him about her experiences that prompted her to go to study as a designer.
Thought he would consider her selfish. But in reality - she considered him selfish!
“After all, he goes to his beloved sea! He says that he cannot live without him! This is what egoists do, they do everything for themselves, they think about themselves and their business. So I heard from my parents in my childhood,”she was indignant in her heart, but did not dare to tell him about her fears, which were visiting her more and more often.
She believed that he was missing one moment - there was a risk that he might one day not return. And that would be his concern, to give her the opportunity to acquire a new profession.
But can she worry about herself without waiting for her husband's permission and blessing?
From Uv. gestalt therapist Dmitry Lenngren
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