2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
How to refuse to live your life and ultimately fall into depression? There are many tried and tested ways - so familiar and familiar! They will teach you how to spend time and energy on anything other than what is really important to you and even help you get confused about what is important to you.
So, here are eight very harmful tips:
1. Immediately agree to everything every time the other person tells you what he wants. Under no circumstances should you ask yourself what you want. A habitual help here will be the ideas absorbed in early childhood that you should be “good”, that it is bad and wrong to refuse other people, that because of this they can refuse you.
2. Do not think about your limits: what are you willing to invest in relationships, work, hobbies. You need to take on everything, not giving yourself time to think about whether you really need it or whether you are rolling by inertia, which supports your accelerated rhythm of life. Do not think that the case is generally not for you, but for another person. A strong point here can be your sense of guilt, which others can successfully ride, creating the illusion that without you everything will fall apart at once, thereby nourishing another illusion - the feeling of “being needed”. And this feeling is illusory, because:
a) nothing will fall apart without you, b) this need is built on potential guilt for something that can collapse, and not on your value, c) your own need, in fact, you can choose for yourself: to whom, when and in what it is important for you to be needed and proceed from your needs and desires, and not under pressure from others.
3) Caring too much for loved ones. To such an extent that sometimes you begin to hate them for drawing all the juices out of you, but persistently do not say “no” to them and continue to make your loved ones pleasant at the cost of your own comfort and well-being.
4. To confuse love with caring and make loved ones helpless, at least in their own eyes, because it is so touching to see joy on their faces. At the same time, it is important in no case to admit to yourself that you are experiencing discomfort, fatigue and disgust.
5. Replace your ideas and values with others. If you were asked what you want, answer immediately, without delay, give back those desires that are either "expired", that is, with which you are no longer burning, but clearly remember that you once wanted. You can offer those desires that were not yours at all - spied on in movies, advertisements or heard from people who are your authority.
6. To envy. Also, the easiest way to lose your desires is to watch the success of another and want that result. The main thing is not to think about what path the other person has traveled and in what context this success exists.
7. Stop yourself in time on the way to fulfill your desire. Here, such attitudes will be useful: "I still won't succeed", "I don't have the resources for this, it's too expensive / time-consuming" and other variations on the theme "I can't afford it." The main thing is to repeat this installation as often as possible. Then it will be automated so much that it will cease to be noticeable even to you, and will appear immediately after the desire arises, so quickly that you will not even have time to realize anything.
8. Never go to a psychologist. And then suddenly you will begin to disassemble this strange apathy and feeling of detachment from your life and, even worse, you will find your desires, your joy and your meanings to live. Just imagine: leave the consultation of a psychologist and start wanting to live, plan something from the heart, feel inspiration … and all the years of self-stops to waste.
This list can be continued and diversified. Perhaps he will help you notice how you stop and interrupt the process of living your life, and at least realize that not close ones “steal” your life, and does not exist by itself, the fact of over-employment hanging over your life. What exactly do you organize your living space in this way? And if you can accept responsibility for your life and not fall into guilt and self-flagellation at the same time, then suddenly you will see that you have a choice to change. Change as a result of hard work, learn to notice your condition, recognize depression and fatigue, catch the moments when you have too much of something, and realize the need for rest, as well as understand what kind of rest you like. Do not use familiar ideas and ready-made answers, but rely on your desires at every moment. Start moving forward towards your goals, feeling yourself and your capabilities in return for the ideas once learned from someone.
Good luck along the way!
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