How To Prevent Cheating?

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

In any relationship, betrayal of a partner is his responsibility and decision (a person decided so, which means that he needed it). Sometimes, no matter how hard one of the partners tries to make the relationship ideal, the other still looks to the left (“like you don't feed a wolf, he keeps looking into the forest”).

How to prevent cheating? What needs to be done to make your partner feel good around you?

1. Let's start from the reverse. What should not be done in any case? Don't punish your partner with lack of sex or emotional coldness. Often, practically all parents behave in this way when children are small - they use the method of "emotional distance" if the child is naughty and does not obey. We carry this line of behavior into adulthood, which as a result leads to a completely justified reaction from the partner (“Okay, since you are so angry and unbalanced, I will find a kinder woman”). Nowadays, both men and women are punished with sex, but punishment by lack of sexual relations is akin to childish behavior.

Learn to communicate with your partner, you do not need to sit in different corners of the room and wait until the other starts the conversation first (“Why were you offended?”). Try to overcome the resentment and clarify the situation so that there are no misunderstandings between you (“Let's talk. I do not think that the fault lies entirely with me, but it is important for me to discuss the situation with you so that resentment, anger, disappointment and frustration recede into the background, and you and I could continue to live normally”).

2. Stop getting paranoid.

The more you try to "reveal" a partner in something, show him an open distrust, the more likely it can lead to betrayal and betrayal. Such a simple axiom is connected with the fact that one of the partners has an open trauma in his soul for rejection, betrayal, abandonment. Perhaps, as a child, he observed his parents cheating and thus provokes another partner. Trust your loved one. Trust is a two-way road. If you trust your partner, he will trust in return.

Paranoia most often occurs when partners become distant from each other in the face of trauma. Mental shock causes a certain tension, as a result, one of the partners reacts sharply to distance and to the fact that the other has become emotionally cold, stays longer at work, pays less attention to communication when he returns home, says little about himself, etc. As a result, there is emotional distrust, unreasonable suspicion is included.

How to deal with this condition? First, you need to ask yourself: “What does not suit my partner in me? What's not satisfying? What could have caused it to move away? " Perhaps there were too many of you in the relationship, or, on the contrary, you ignored your partner's emotions at the moment when he needed care and emotional involvement. " For example, after a year of joint relationships, one of the partners had a life crisis, respectively, the person wants to get more care and attention, and not getting what he wants, he is offended (“You don’t cook for me when I come home from work!”, “You don’t you meet me”, etc.). As a rule, claims are voiced repeatedly, but the second partner does not pay attention to them, hoping that they will love him and accept him as he is.

However, it is worth considering the downside - adult relationships by default presuppose reciprocity. You give, you are given in return. That is why you should not ignore the desires of your partner, listen to his needs, ask directly what you like (“I noticed that you have been moving away lately. What is this connected with?”). After receiving the answer, try to believe and hear exactly what the person wants to say, and not draw completely opposite scenes in your imagination.

3. Learn to forgive, close your eyes to some minor offenses of your partner (open tube of toothpaste, scattered hair, undersalted borscht, socks and shoes are out of place, etc.).

How to do it? It is enough to analyze a simple situation. For example, a partner used a kitchen towel to dry the table. If you focus his attention on this, firstly, he will stop helping in the future in the kitchen, and secondly, the situation will cause quarrels, resentment and, as a result, partners will stop communicating. Is the towel worth fighting?

Quite often we quarrel over little things - we want it to be so, that's all. But can this be put on the scales of your relationship?

4. It is necessary to add "peppercorn" to the relationship - no scandals, nagging and quarrels (although it depends on the couple, some, on the contrary, are excited by screams). On the Internet, you can find millions of tips on how to do this - eroticism, flirting, role-playing games in unusual clothes and an unexpected place.

The most important thing is the effect of surprise for a partner (an unusual romantic meeting, a completely new role in a relationship (a decent harlot girl), etc.).

5. Give each other a sense of importance and importance, show care, attention, respect and emotional warmth. Harmonious relationships are built on these whales.

In fact, nothing keeps partners together, except for emotional involvement in each other (admiration for each other, sparkle in the eyes, some subtle excitement, a sense of significance, interest and involvement in the life of a loved one).

Communication with a psychotherapist is valuable because, unlike many people in the world, a psychologist is completely devoted to the client (all emotions experienced are closely related only to him). It is this behavior that we lacked in childhood with our parents and we lack in adulthood in close relationships. If you can give it to your partner, he will never leave you or cheat on you.