2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Nowadays, a lot of people turn to fortune-tellers, psychics and astrologers "for help" in order to reduce their anxiety, but they do not receive exactly the information they want to hear, so the level of anxiety only increases
Why do people turn to such specialists? Wanting to reduce their anxiety, they try in this way to shift responsibility from themselves to another person (“It was not me who made the decision, someone else did it for me!”). However, on the other hand, we go to them, trying to get consolation, to hear that everything will be fine. In most cases, psychics give their client what they want - they calm, comfort, convince that everything will be all right and not worth worrying about. But there may be a reverse situation - a person is given various conflicting information (for example, something will happen, etc.), as a result, he becomes obsessed with it. In order not to fall into this vicious circle, we must remember that our fate is in our hands. Yes, there are undoubtedly moments in life that we will never be able to influence and control (for example, some disasters, fire, plane crash, etc.). On the one hand, each of us has a choice, but on the other hand, there are places and situations that we do not choose - what happens happens.
So why do people try to find out their destiny? The main reason is an increased level of anxiety associated with a rejection of one's true self, one's desires and needs, a lack of understanding of one's “I” and life goals. When a person clearly understands what he wants to get out of life, he confidently goes to his goal.
Another reason is some toxic shame that we may not even be aware of or feel. Against the background of all this, an attempt is made to correspond to the image we have created (as a rule, it is collective - from our parents; those who raised us; people whom we consider to be authorities, because they live right, their recognition, acceptance, love and contact is important for us). Conditionally - if I behave differently from what my mother expects, she will abandon me (according to my ideas). This is often a false belief, because if you look at the whole situation with the eyes of love and acceptance, you realize that your mother will accept you as you are. If a child chooses a path other than the parental path, it is always difficult for the parent to come to terms, he will experience a frustrating experience and strong emotions, but sooner or later he will make this decision. Behind all this, at an unconscious level, there is a rather strong erroneous belief that there is some kind of correct decision, the right path, events and actions, and only then can the correct result be obtained.
In most cases, if you dig deep into such a psyche, it will become clear that a person inside his consciousness experiences himself as small (to varying degrees). It was then that he had a feeling in life that everyone around was adults and serious, and I am the smallest among them, I know nothing about life and must obey adults. Nobody really knows how to live right! In life, there is no definition of what is right and what is not. The rules are created by people, doing this because of their increased anxiety - they do not want to make decisions, take responsibility, admit the fact that the present situation is a consequence of their own decisions, once made, and actions within the framework of the choice made. In order not to make a decision every time (do it now or that, put on a dress or trousers, etc.), I will act in accordance with the accepted rules. That's it - there is no more anxiety, there is no need to constantly think about the choice, the decision was made for me.
However, in all this there is a huge minus - obeying the rules and norms, we lose a creative streak in life, we lose the ability to adapt, we cannot adapt to our character and characteristics. This point is very important. The easiest way is to say: “I was told that I need to live like this!”. Perhaps, in a particular individual situation, such actions are really correct and acceptable, but you cannot put everything on the same level (even if it seems to you that the situation is as close to yours as possible, there will still be at least 1% difference, and the decision must be made differently).
Undoubtedly, having made a decision based on someone else's opinion, you will be calmer, and besides, there is someone to blame in case of failure. It's easier to live this way, but this is the infantile position of the inner child that you consider yourself to be.
Pull yourself out into reality every time. If you are over 18 years old, you are an adult, the same participant in society, like everyone around you - you are responsible for your actions, you are obliged to make decisions, like those around you.
This is your own task.
It is very important here to reduce the level of anxiety by thinking over and accepting all possible events and results that your actions will lead to. At the same time, it is imperative to ensure your safety (first of all, within you). Conventionally - if the world turns upside down, you can still return to your present position and status. Yes, you may have to work harder and longer, reconsider desires, but you will come to the desired goal. The bottom line is that it doesn't matter how you achieve what you want. There are skills, knowledge, skills that you can rely on in order to ensure your safety at any moment of time, and the most important values and resources are deeply rooted inside your consciousness.
Who are you inside? The answer to this question will make your life safe, everything else is just temporary relief from anxiety (no matter who you go to, no matter what you say).
Stop relying on the outside, rely on yourself and your values, desires and path. And be sure to adhere to the belief that everything in your life depends only on you!
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