2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Closeness is manifested in the mutual ability and willingness to show oneself to the Other, to open up as “who I am”, to talk about one's feelings and thoughts, to share worries and doubts, creates conditions for the opportunity to be oneself next to the Other.
Intimacy has its own functions: it satisfies the need for belonging, helps develop the self-awareness of partners, creates an opportunity for a full and deep understanding of one's life experience, and ensures the successful implementation of family functions.
Emotional closeness also has its own stages of development: the emergence of interest and sympathy, mutual understanding, empathy, acceptance and support, trust, readiness and desire for self-disclosure.
True closeness opens up opportunities for a true Meeting - not only with the Other, but also with oneself. Meeting with the Other is that spiritual resonance, after which transformation, changes, psychological and spiritual maturation occur. The personality feels itself in a new quality, which begins to manifest itself in all spheres of life. Any transformation is inherently accompanied by intense feelings and pain. This explains the paradoxical nature of the phenomenon of the Meeting - we simultaneously strive for it with all our souls, and are afraid of it. Fear of pain. Fear of judgment. Fear of rejection. Fear of evaluation. During the Meeting with oneself, a Meeting with one's vulnerabilities, sore spots, unhealed wounds can occur. These are the threats and risks of close relationships.
For true intimacy to emerge, you need a safe relationship space. And both are responsible for creating this space.
How do I myself influence the safe space of our relationship? Do I often criticize my partner? In what form do I criticize him? Am I not devaluing him, not judging him, not ignoring him? How do I support him?
What actions and reactions of my partner do I perceive as dangerous for myself? What is the threat to me? This allows you to discover your vulnerabilities, your sensitivity, your wounds and injuries. And the most effective way to heal them is through psychotherapy.
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