Skype Or Non-Skype

2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43

Dear colleagues, in this message I share a generalized experience and some observations obtained in two ways (from about 2009 to the present): in fact, consulting on Skype as such and consulting colleagues about working on Skype, which, in an acceptable sense, can be called learning. I do not encroach on the truth under any circumstances, I only state the reality that I observe. I hope you find this article interesting and helpful.

Contents: introduction; technical points and explanations to them; main secret; completion; illustrations.

Introduction

Skype consulting is one of the forms of online consulting. There is also consulting by email, consulting in the Internet cabinet, consulting on specialized Internet sites (websites, forums). For groups: conducting webinars and Skype groups.

We do not consider such forms of counseling in this article, but we are talking only about individual counseling via Skype. Also, we do not consider other signs of an online consultant, such as: a website, a blog, a page on a social network, and so on - this is another topic that deserves special attention.

Among the colleagues who asked for advice: general and social psychologists, psychotherapists, coaches, gestalt therapists, psychoanalysts. The consultation process always takes place via Skype, the number of hours of consultation for one person is from 1 to 6 hours. The age of colleagues and the number of years of practice are different.

In general, according to my feelings, the main (but not the only) components of the process on the part of the person who asked for advice are:

a) fear / rejection of the Internet in general and the computer in particular;

b) doubts / obtaining an internal work permit via Skype;

c) a ban on the beginning or continuation of practice (in general, that is, not only through the Internet).

The content of clause "c" is not initially included in our contract, therefore it is not discussed, we do not focus attention on it, but one way or another, the topic of "practice in general" may sound. For me it was a revelation, and for those who asked for advice - a kind of bonus.

In other words, the content of point “b” can be presented as follows: “If there were Skype in the time of Z. Freud, would he conduct consultations via Skype? »My option: I would. Probably, if in the time of S. Freud there were no couches, telephone communication and paper, he would have done without them.

Sometimes doubts are expressed something like this: “The Internet is something inanimate, dead, and Skype is cold, I feel uncomfortable in it. I need the client to be in the same room with me, this is the only way I can work, the only way is the therapeutic alliance possible."

As for the first part of this fantasy: if the consultant in front of the monitor is “inanimate,” “dead,” “cold,” “uncomfortable,” this does not mean that the client is the same. There are live people on both sides of the monitor, even if they do not see each other, but are texting. Is someone typing "letters"? Definitely not a robot or a dead man.

For the second part of this fantasy: a personal analyst or supervisor. My opinion is that the best office is an alliance between the therapist and the patient, and it does not depend on the shape of the office. If the alliance is not in the "regular office", then it will not be in the Skype-office either, the "Internet itself" has little to do with it.

On point "a". In Russia, "computers and the Internet" have been actively present for more than twenty years, as well as the opportunities they provide. Why give up on them? We once did without mobile phones and other "gadgets". As soon as they appeared, it turned out that we really need them. Among the fears, colleagues named: fear (sometimes - confidence) of causing harm to the computer, “pushing the wrong place”, “catching viruses”, “I keep breaking the computer”.

None of the above points was included in the contract for training Skype-consulting, but one way or another it could be voiced. In order not to go beyond the scope of the contract, but to be precisely in the topic of "learning Skype-consulting", she suggested "to go from the other side."

Namely, as it turned out:

if we simply explain the technical component of the process, show “where to press” and “what to do specifically,” that is, to give an opportunity to master a space in a safe environment that turns out to be not so scary or quite simple and it turns out that frightening space quite manageable, then most of the fears and obstacles disappear.

We will deal with this, right now, and go from simple to complex.

Technical and explanations

1. Laptop, desktop computer or other gadget?

Definitely a laptop (netbook). Because he's mobile. Not “another gadget” because at the moment there are or may be software compatibility issues, for example, on your gadget and the client's computer. A desktop computer is not bad at all in Skype consulting, but it is difficult to move, and such a need may arise.

2. Webcam and headphones.

"Webka" - a webcam. All modern laptops have a built-in webcam. Then it's a matter of taste: choose a webcam that can be closed with a shutter for the time of inactivity or without a shutter. If you don't have a built-in webcam, you need to purchase and test one (see Lighting below).

Headphones here are conditional. You actually need a headset (headphones and microphone). Even if the consultant is alone in the room, a headset is needed. The typeface is one of the confidentiality symbols of the process. It is not only symbolically a means of ensuring the confidentiality of the process, but also in fact.

The presence of a headset means “I am exactly now and here - with you and with no one else. I not only hear you, I am ready to listen and hear you."

If the consultant works without a headset from home and even in a separate room, the client will hear everything that happens in the apartment. The barking of a dog, screams from the kitchen "dinner is ready", doorbells, children's games - all this will be heard by the client. Not all of the listed everyday sounds are present in the “ordinary office”.

The headset should be chosen in the same way as young ladies choose elegant shoes for a holiday: long and carefully. The consultant will be wearing the headset, possibly several hours a day. Accordingly, it should be as comfortable as possible. Female consultants are more likely to choose a headset with a “headrest”, when the headband is on the back of the head and “does not spoil the hair”.

You need a comfortable and "ordinary" headset. There is no real need to buy a headset designed for computer games or listening to music. Also, do not buy a headset with in-ear headphones, they are inconvenient to use. A remote headset is also not needed (without a wire), since the length of a conventional headset's wire is enough to (for example) sit in front of the webcam so that the client sees the consultant “in full”.

If you have difficulties with the choice, you need to tell the seller: "I need a headset for talking on Skype." See Figure 1.

3. Microphone.

Headset microphones generally come in two flavors: a rigid or flexible arm. Choosing flexible because the location of the microphone is important for environmental friendliness and the adequacy of the process of dialogue with the client.

The most common mistake: the microphone is positioned by the consultant exactly under the nose (at the mouth) so that “it is better heard”. First, for "better hearing" use the sound level setting.

Secondly, we all, from time to time, sneeze, cough, snore in sessions. And, if in the “usual office” our client hears our cough “in the background”, then in this case he will hear our snorting “in his ear”. Moreover, if the client is also wearing a headset.

If there is no therapeutic need to sniff the client directly into the ear, it is better to remove the microphone from under the nose. This is easier to do with a gooseneck microphone. The microphone should be placed either near the bridge of the nose (that is, above the mouth) or take it forward, away from the face.

During the session, a phone call may sound … More often, the consultant lowers the headset around his neck, forgetting that the microphone has not gone anywhere, and the client can hear the entire telephone conversation.

In this case, there are two options: 1) completely remove the headset and put it on the table, 2) lower the headset around your neck, completely cover the microphone with your palm (cover) and only then bring the phone to your ear. The same should be done if the consultant wants to take a sip of coffee. You just need to consider: the sound in Skype consultation is not the same as in the "regular office".

As practice shows: during the sessions, the simple procedure of turning the sound level to "zero" is forgotten, it is not a quick process, that is, the option with covering ("capturing") the microphone with the palm of your hand turned out to be more acceptable and convenient.

4. Lighting

All webcams work differently … Some of the consultants attach importance to lighting, some do not, some do it from time to time. Sometimes (not always) lighting can play a role. For example, when working with a client living in a different time zone, you can shade the windows and turn on artificial lighting, since the client is "already evening" (by time). For this purpose, the webcam settings are also suitable, which you need to know about in advance (see paragraph 2).

Same…

Backlighting is a light source behind the consultant's back (for example, the consultant sits with his back to the window, behind his back is sunlight, there is no artificial lighting in front of the face). In this case, the client sees only the dark silhouette of the consultant. If there is no need to present the client with the Shadow in the literal sense, it is better to just rearrange the laptop and change seats or turn the webcam in the other direction so that the light falls from the side of the consultant's face. If it is not possible to change seats, you can draw the curtains and turn on artificial lighting.

The most successful lighting during the session (again - if there is no other need): one source of ceiling lighting, one source of side lighting (for example, a wall sconce), one source of frontal lighting (for example, a table lamp half a meter from the face). There are consultants who practice working in the dark, that is, they are illuminated only by the light coming from the monitor. Sometimes it is necessary to do this, but it also needs to be taken into account - under such lighting, the consultant looks more blue and ominous than mysterious. See Figure 2.

5. Consultant in front of the webcam

There are more nuances of the location of the consultant in front of the webcam than you might think … Here are some of them … All of the following matters.

The close-up should not "cut" the consultant exactly along the neckline, the middle shot should not "cut" the consultant exactly along the waist line. Any webcam distorts the proportions, should it be aggravated? That is, it will be correct: a close-up - the face, neck, partially shoulders, and the middle plan ends under the chest or just below the waist.

Skype consultants have an expression: "I climb into your apartment." This is a "very close-up". To find out what it looks like, ask your Skype interlocutor to move significantly closer to the monitor. More often, a "very close-up" is obtained "by accident", when the consultant reflexively approaches the monitor "in order to hear better" or "to better listen." There is already a headset for these purposes.

If we tilt the monitor forward (that is, we tilt the webcam towards us, down), then from the client's side it may look like "I am taller than you, I am looking at you from above."

If we deflect the monitor away from us (that is, we deflect the webcam away from us, upwards), then from the client's side it may look like “I am below you, I look at you from below”.

There are clients who ask you not to look at them, in this case you can offer to work only with audio (without turning on the webcam) or move from the webcam to the side.

Often, consultants in front of the webcam turn into a pillar of salt, as if they are waiting for a photograph. You can move. Experienced Skype consultants know about the quality of the Internet connection (it can be different), so they are used to freezing images in "ugly" angles.

For consultants practicing literal client mirroring (this can be especially important in Skype, face-to-face), it is all the more important to be able to move. To do this, it is important to remember not only about the very possibility of "moving yourself", but also about the position of the laptop, and about the height at which the chair is.

A bit of practice. When I was using a netbook (this is a small laptop), it was very difficult to find a body position in which to be "face to face". Then I put several thick books under the netbook. Then I changed the chair, changed the classic one to a modern office one, the height of which is regulated by an elevator. The session begins, I sit, as usual, and the client sits "somewhere on the floor", downstairs, I take an elevator "zip" and already "next" to the client.

Special note for female counselors … This secret was revealed jointly with fellow Skype consultant Shami. The quality and cost of cosmetics is not visible through Skype. Skype-consultant has several sets of cosmetics: “for every day and for holidays”, “for Skype”. Make-up for work on Skype is really different from the daily and holiday. What is “correct” is achieved purely empirically.

Here we will smoothly move on to anecdotes, then - about the most important and secret. From my previously published post "How to know that you are an online consultant":

“You wake up with your head buried in your laptop, lying on your headphones, and your first morning action is to turn on the computer, if you turn it off at all. You have several virtual wallets, and it seems to you that you remember their numbers by heart. First, you swear at the "high percentage" that virtual banks take, then you add this percentage to the estimate, shifting the responsibility to the clients. Sample accounts for legal entities and individuals hang on the computer desktop and hang in the place where it is most comfortable to click the mouse. Once every six months, you wipe the keyboard with a special cloth, and when the keyboard turns white, a new stage begins in your life. You have long ceased to chase the cat off the table when she walks on the keyboard. For he learned to see through the animal. Even if you remember that you need to hide the headphones at night, because the cat has already gnawed the previous ones, all the same - one day you will forget to remove the headphones and in the morning you will again find instead of one wiring - two that the cat made at night. The order in the room is limited by the frame of the webcam."

The most important secret of Skype-consulting

The frame of the frame (the space that is limited by the webcam's eye) is the OFFICE (the same as “normal”).

Everything that is in the frame is in the office. Everything that is outside the frame is OUTSIDE the cabinet. All that the webcam sees is an office. Everything is exactly “everything”.

Respectively…

Would a consultant hang an elegant carpet on the wall in his “usual office”? Would a consultant want to come to a specialist who sits with his elbows on a dirty tile? Would a consultant want to come to a specialist with a shelf of pots over his head and a kitchen sink with unwashed dishes behind him?

Skype-cabinet is measured in the same way as a "regular cabinet" … A "regular office" has an area, walls, ceiling, window (as a rule). The "regular office" has furniture. Skype-cabinet is also measurable and has its limits. We measure not only in height and width, but also in depth.

Skype-cabinet is equipped with exactly the same care and thoughtfulness as a “regular office”. If the consultant works from home (however, this is also related to work from the office), then he provides a "cabinet picture" in the frame. This, of course, is ideal, but you can strive for it.

If the consultant loves comfort in a "regular office", then why make the Skype room cozy as well? It is not difficult at all: “fence off” a small enough space in the house and arrange it in such a way that the client sees something else besides the consultant's head and the wallpaper behind him. In a "regular office" the client sees not only the head and the wallpaper.

If you have any problems or questions about organizing Skype-consulting, you need to find direct or indirect analogs in working in a "regular office":

- How can I do this in Skype?

- How would you do the same in a "regular office"?

The client comes to our office, wherever the office is located, and not "home", do not "visit". At the moment, in most cases, Skype-cabinets are in two states: it is either outright "household trash" or "face-wallpaper". As a rule, colleagues treat their usual offices with respect and reverence. What prevents you from treating your Skype account in the same way?

At the end of our practice-oriented lecture …

I have never offered, do not offer and do not plan to offer Skype-consulting instead of working in a regular office. Skype-consulting is just one of the possible forms of work organization. Traffic jams are at least in favor of Skype consulting. If on the way of the client to the office there was a giant traffic jam or Yandex-Traffic jams warned about it in advance, the client will be late for the session anyway, if "he arrives at all". One more argument in favor: a "contagious disease" of a client or a specialist ("I can work, but I am a bacillus"). One or two sessions from time to time can be carried out via Skype, while the setting will be preserved.

In addition, based on experience, I can say with confidence: "such" sudden or planned change in the organization can play a role in the dynamics. And the most interesting option is to combine "regular" counseling with remote counseling. For example, when the client and the consultant live in different cities, and the client from time to time comes to the "regular office".

Skype counseling is the same as "regular" and not the same as "regular" - at the same time. In some ways "easier", in some ways "more difficult". The form is different, the content is "the same".

Fig. 1

This headset is most likely intended for computer games. It will be hot in these headphones. The microphone does not have a gooseneck.

In-ear headphones are uncomfortable for extended periods of time.

The most comfortable headset: flexible microphone, lightweight headphones, the bow is located at the back of the head.

Doubtful location of the microphone "under the nose".

Fig. 2

Lighting, from left to right: frontal, side, backlight.

On the left - frontal lighting, on the right - back lighting.

Text: E. A. Nechaeva, January, 2015. Illustrations: from open sources.