2024 Author: Harry Day | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 15:43
Often we can condemn ourselves for our insecurity, fall into despair because of it, feel guilty, feel anger at ourselves, often because of the fact of such insecurity, we can shame ourselves.
Why are we doing this? How will this help us? Did you have a feeling that all this, all this criticism directed at you, all this censure, rejection of yourself, helps you? Something I strongly doubt! We already feel bad at some moments, but we still practically physically beat ourselves for the fact that we are already feeling so bad.
Is it not absurd? Are we worthy of such an attitude, an attitude towards ourselves !? If we do not love ourselves, if we offend ourselves, why should others respect us, appreciate us? If we respect ourselves, if we are interesting to ourselves, if we support ourselves, then others will treat us accordingly!
The main difficulty lies in how we relate to our insecurity. If you allow yourself to be insecure about something, allow yourself to be imperfect, shy, making mistakes from time to time, then you will gain strength!
Yes, and why is it necessary to call it uncertainty? Maybe there is some other way to call such our manifestations ?. For example, I prefer to tell myself in such situations that this is some experience, thanks to which I grow. I tell myself that this is a common thing, everything is vital, I am not a robot to be emotionless, insensitive, flawless always and everywhere …
Is this the point - to spread rot on yourself? You are shy, and even punish yourself for it: I'm defective, bad!
Isn't it better to support yourself? Yes, everyone is not perfect, everyone is shy from time to time, everyone is wrong, I am the same as everyone else!
Yes, as I mentioned above, I am also shy, mistaken, sometimes squeezed. But I do not blame myself and do not blame for this! And if someone blames you for it, blames you? I think you fear this in the first place, and not just that you made a mistake, were insecure. I'm right? To this I can tell you that these people who condemn us are simply very afraid of such manifestations themselves, they themselves do not accept them, they hide them from others in every possible way. And in order to better hide them, it is important for them to attack another. They simply place their imperfection in the other, project it onto the other. That's all! You can sympathize with them! A truly self-confident person treats others with support and understanding, he does not need to shame others in any way.
How do you like my words?
I look forward to your comments!
Vladislav Mashin, psychologist
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